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  1. #11
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    yes. as long as they don't remind my of their beliefs every 4 seconds. like @Beorn said you can seperate the person from the beliefs, if I didn't do that I'd have even less friends than I do.
    I've always found that really difficult. I guess I could try harder, though I usually assess whether I like somebody based on where their heart is. That said, I hear this hateful ideology day in and day out and it grates on my nerves.
    Enneagram: 6w7 (phobic) > 2w1 > 9w1
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Holland Code: AIS
    Date of Birth: March 15, 1996
    Gender: Male
    Political Stance: Libertarian Liberal (Arizona School/Strong BHL)
    ATHEIST UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST HUMANIST
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    SCIENCE ENTHUSIAST


    I say this as a reminder to myself, but this goes for everyone:

    You can achieve anything you set your mind to, and you are limited only by how dedicated you are to succeed!

    -Magic Qwan

  2. #12
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beorn View Post
    You know it's possible to seperate people from their beliefs. To be intolerant of beliefs and tolerate the person.

    Hate the bigotry.
    Love the bigot.
    But can you like a person whose beliefs you abhor? Because friendship is usually built on a basis of mutual liking.

    I think the christian notion of 'love the sinner, hate the sin' requires either a split personality or a good deal of hypocrisy to be put into practice.

  3. #13
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Ehh some of my extended family is slightly racist and very homophobic. I debate them to a certain extent, if they say things that I find particularly unfair, but I try to get along with them. I think their views suck, but I have a better chance of changing their minds if I am friendly than if I am unfriendly, and I also don't want to become hateful while trying to fight hate. So I try to walk a balanced path of affirming them as fellow beings while pressing them towards more openness and tolerance. But it depends on how far their speech and behavior goes, of course... I try to stay grounded, but it's hard at times.

  4. #14
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic Qwan View Post
    I've always found that really difficult. I guess I could try harder, though I usually assess whether I like somebody based on where their heart is. That said, I hear this hateful ideology day in and day out and it grates on my nerves.
    oh no i wouldn't be friends with those people.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  5. #15
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beorn View Post
    You know it's possible to seperate people from their beliefs. To be intolerant of beliefs and tolerate the person.

    Hate the bigotry.
    Love the bigot.
    this
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  6. #16
    Rainy Day Member Ingrid in grids's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic Qwan View Post
    Well, where do you live? It would be nice to be in a place dominated by love and compassion rather than hatred and fear.
    I live in a multicultural city with a lot of diversity.

  7. #17
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    oh no i wouldn't be friends with those people.
    It is mainstream where I live, as well.
    Enneagram: 6w7 (phobic) > 2w1 > 9w1
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Holland Code: AIS
    Date of Birth: March 15, 1996
    Gender: Male
    Political Stance: Libertarian Liberal (Arizona School/Strong BHL)
    ATHEIST UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST HUMANIST
    and
    SCIENCE ENTHUSIAST


    I say this as a reminder to myself, but this goes for everyone:

    You can achieve anything you set your mind to, and you are limited only by how dedicated you are to succeed!

    -Magic Qwan

  8. #18
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    Ehh some of my extended family is slightly racist and very homophobic. I debate them to a certain extent, if they say things that I find particularly unfair, but I try to get along with them. I think their views suck, but I have a better chance of changing their minds if I am friendly than if I am unfriendly, and I also don't want to become hateful while trying to fight hate. So I try to walk a balanced path of affirming them as fellow beings while pressing them towards more openness and tolerance. But it depends on how far their speech and behavior goes, of course... I try to stay grounded, but it's hard at times.
    I respect you. I deal with the dual reality of always being kind to everybody, and continuing to fight this growing anger and resentment for the way things are and the negative vibes I get from everybody and everything. You are a fighter in the war on injustice. I am proud to be your ally, soldier.
    Enneagram: 6w7 (phobic) > 2w1 > 9w1
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Holland Code: AIS
    Date of Birth: March 15, 1996
    Gender: Male
    Political Stance: Libertarian Liberal (Arizona School/Strong BHL)
    ATHEIST UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST HUMANIST
    and
    SCIENCE ENTHUSIAST


    I say this as a reminder to myself, but this goes for everyone:

    You can achieve anything you set your mind to, and you are limited only by how dedicated you are to succeed!

    -Magic Qwan
    Likes skylights liked this post

  9. #19
    LL P. Stewie Beorn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    But can you like a person whose beliefs you abhor? Because friendship is usually built on a basis of mutual liking.

    I think the christian notion of 'love the sinner, hate the sin' requires either a split personality or a good deal of hypocrisy to be put into practice.
    In general it does take mutual interests and beliefs for a friendship. But I don't think it takes a split personality to get along with someone whose beliefs you abhor. You just have to find things you can appreciate and interactions that you value even if you'll never be BFFs.

    I mean, we have, uh, some significant differences between us but I appreciate your quick-wit and takedowns when I think they're merited. It's much more difficult for me to get along with dull-witted lefties even if they have more in common with me religiously.
    Take the weakest thing in you
    And then beat the bastards with it
    And always hold on when you get love
    So you can let go when you give it

  10. #20
    LL P. Stewie Beorn's Avatar
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    On the hypocracy: That can definately happen. I hate fake nice Christians. Annoying as hell. I guess being on the Internet it probably makes it more difficult to establish any friendships across enemy lines as determining people's genuiness or intentions isn't as easy or at least it isn't for me.

    Edit: Come to think of it just a couple of weeks ago, Nico, I believe you asked my opinion on something and I expressed skepticism that you really wanted to hear it.
    Take the weakest thing in you
    And then beat the bastards with it
    And always hold on when you get love
    So you can let go when you give it

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