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Thread: Confessions

  1. #2491
    Queen hunter Array Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    I see that people give me strange look about my switch to Te dom so I will copy/paste post from another thread. The problem is that I am here because of my inner struggle regarding other people.

    Therefore I think that is perhaps time to put some things into perspective.



    Well, the thing is that I can brag how I finnished high school at the very top of my class, how I started my careeer with saving of pretty expenssive multi million project, and tell you how in group assignments in collage it was ALWAYS me who was in charge of organizing the group and how we always had pretty good final results/grades, back in a day when I played video strategy games it was in general everybody against me most of the time (and it was still a fair fight), I am pushing myself to be the head of the familiy since it is obvious that the familiy doesn't know what they are doing and someone has to repair plenty of things, I have a very concrete plan in motion to be a buisness owner despite the fact how socialistic my country is, I have climbed mountains and walked through mine fields, my father claims I am better cook than my mother, I have a degree in my second language and I also have on the side one mini buisness degree that I ended with straight A, I have "connections", I pay close look on public finances and general political climate (and make my own theories what should be done), when I was buillied in school I realized that no one cares so I have solved that with brute force on my own, I was sarcastic with people no one even dared to look in the eye, when I am angry I cut down a tree in my mothers garden ....


    Here I don't share parts where I am doing good or great but instead I push into the part where I have problems and that is: why people think I am unfeeling bastard and say that I belong to mental institution, why most of my social activities often ends up in me bossing or fighting people? Why on 10 dates with different girls all 10 ended with them disappearing afterwards or saying they don't date machines or people who give advantage to debating foreign politics to just saying how great their day was. Why were 4 of my friends celebrating publically and loudly on the street when they combined barely managed to win a single game against me ? (and even that is questionable since the fifth guy came behind my back and saw where and what are my troops and passed on the info) ... etc.


    I am simply tired of being "the rock" no one wants really close.
    Trust me my typing is pretty spot on, but feedback of people about me in real life is often so negative that I just keep things to myself in real life. It is just as they are jealous or scared of me.




    EDIT: and I am tired of my "childhood war talk", it is just that wherever I go that bubbles out to the surface in my arguments since I have to explain myself.

  2. #2492
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
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    As much as I like the new Radiohead single, my first reaction to it was to roll my eyes at how incredibly Radioheady it is. Treading absolutely no new lyrical ground. Same themes as always.

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  3. #2493
    like snow, like gold Array magpie's Avatar
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    There is nothing I hate more than the sound of people chewing. I have to leave the room.

  4. #2494
    ♂ Bᴏʀɴ Tᴏ Mᴀᴋᴇ Hɪsᴛᴏʀʏ Array Yamato Nadeshiko's Avatar
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    I can't be happy for him if he leaves... I can't see him off with a smile.
    Johari / Nohari
    6w7 9w1 2w1 - so/sx
    Phlegmatic - Melancholic
    Sensitive - Solitary - Serious

  5. #2495
    Senior Member Array Eskimo2's Avatar
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    Ive posted too much today. More than I would have liked to. But the thing is, content hasnt been so bad and I got other stuff done so I am not that angry at msyself. Feels healthier- more like a hobby than a second life now. Still getting there tbh though. I cant lie and say that sometimes the urge to come on here when I know I shouldnt hits me- come on here in a really bad state. But so far for the most part Ive been able to prevent that. But again, honestly, Im not a perfect person so I could fuck up. Going to try not to fuck up any more though. I hate doing that.

  6. #2496
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
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    I'm in friend-love with someone who moved to Kansas a few months ago, and I want to visit her, but probably won't because I'm 1) afraid of driving* and 2) too prideful to let myself be chauffeured around.

    *to clarify: afraid of being pulled over, not afraid of the act of driving itself

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!
    Likes five sounds liked this post

  7. #2497
    4x9 Array cascadeco's Avatar
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    It is not a lifestyle I want/regular schedule I want, but I have to say being an opener at the store (4:30am start), now and then, isn't so bad. Getting a full 8 hrs of work in, while being done for the day at 1pm, is pretty kickass. But yeah, I don't want to it every day. lol
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

    My Photography and Watercolor Fine Art Prints!!! Cascade Colors Fine Art Prints
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    Likes EJCC, Yamato Nadeshiko liked this post

  8. #2498
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
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    I have a habit -- maybe it's type-related? -- of not making myself learn the details of things, and instead making myself learn the gist and assuming the details will work themselves into my brain on their own. It's gotten me into trouble in recent years.

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  9. #2499
    FRACTALICIOUS Array phobik's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hel View Post
    There is nothing I hate more than the sound of people chewing. I have to leave the room.
    To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
    ~ Elbert Hubbard

    Music provides one of the clearest examples of a much deeper relation between mathematics and human experience.
    Likes magpie liked this post

  10. #2500
    Fantasticality. Array Forever's Avatar
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    I am starting to plan and underthink. Wtf.
    In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks. - John Muir

    Founder of Serious Level

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