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  1. #21
    Senior Member danseen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Urarienev View Post
    I don't like hypocrites...someone whos actions contradict what they say.

    ...but then again... show me one person that's never been a hypocrite in their whole life....

    one can't dislike them without disliking oneself.
    True. but then many people lie and we generally don't tolerate liars.

  2. #22
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    I'd define it as saying/doing one thing and then in a later instance doing the opposite without explanation.

    I don't get why it's wrong, since it's normal IMO.
    I think it depends on the frequency and the outcomes. If someone occasionally deviates, that's entirely normal and should even be expected from time to time. That said, it's responsible and conscientious to try to let people know when you've changed your mind about something that's going to significantly affect them. It can also get to the point with some people where it is so constant that you just can't trust their words at all, and then that's frustrating.

  3. #23
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    i don't really monitor or internalize other people's behavior very much. i do appreciate people who change a lot though, because it's a sign of active exploration and growth, from my point of view.

    i like to explore new ideas, try on new hats, and feel free to change my behavior and beliefs as the nuances of situations vary and as i get new information. from there, i to answer to myself on integrity issues. i feel like it's easy to get the wrong idea about the "whys" behind someone's actions as an outside observer, and i think people get too worked up about that kind of thing.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  4. #24
    Senior Member danseen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nicolita View Post
    i don't really monitor or internalize other people's behavior very much. i do appreciate people who change a lot though, because it's a sign of active exploration and growth, from my point of view.

    i like to explore new ideas, try on new hats, and feel free to change my behavior and beliefs as the nuances of situations vary and as i get new information. from there, i to answer to myself on integrity issues. i feel like it's easy to get the wrong idea about the "whys" behind someone's actions as an outside observer, and i think people get too worked up about that kind of thing.
    Maybe it's me, but what others do in life is not really something I monitor either, unless it causes harm to me or others I care about. I guess I have a very live and let live/liberal worldview.

    But I personally wouldn't consider changed behaviour contradiction. If a person I know was a vegan and I saw them drinking cattle or goat's milk, then I'd think they'd either dumped veganism, become vegetarian and had a change of heart. To expect somebody to be static IMO is a fool's errand.

  5. #25
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    Maybe it's me, but what others do in life is not really something I monitor either, unless it causes harm to me or others I care about. I guess I have a very live and let live/liberal worldview.

    But I personally wouldn't consider changed behaviour contradiction. If a person I know was a vegan and I saw them drinking cattle or goat's milk, then I'd think they'd either dumped veganism, become vegetarian and had a change of heart. To expect somebody to be static IMO is a fool's errand.
    yeah i think we're pretty like-minded here. funny you mentioned veganism. i was just saying yesterday that i should tell people i'm vegetarian so they don't hound me when i pass on meat, but i want to be able to eat meat when i want to, so people would criticize me for that. i can admire consistency in a person, but i think i'm generally more pleased when i see people moving through phases or holding multiple (possibly contradictory) ideas as possibilities. it seems more natural to me.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  6. #26
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    Humans are not perfect, so why does it matter if people contradict?

    It's common to know that self-interest is the major motivation, is it not?
    Inconsistent people, as in people who are consistently inconsistent or contradictory, they can contradict elsewhere. That behavior is flaky, unstable, whatever the reason but just go away from me. This doesn't include - rethinking a situation. Changing minds when new information is made available..etc. This is about people doing it on a regular basis.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  7. #27
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    I am generally an inconsistent person. But largely in the realm of moods and whims more than anything deep-rooted.

    What I mean is that I tend not to outwardly state my positions in certainty, largely because I really am NOT certain of them and it's one of the few things I take seriously.

    After all if I am going to hold myself to an ideal, then the verbalisation of that ideal should come after the demonstration of it in myself, rather than the other way around.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  8. #28
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    Is or should there be a difference between intentional inconsistency and supposed "unintentional" inconsistency?
    That is in part what I am saying. It also partly deals with motivations. If a person is intentionally trying to deceive another and their behavior comes across as inconsistent as result, then I judge that far more harshly. I don't judge so harshly when someone doesn't really know what they want, is indecisive, doesn't know how they feel, etc.

    Your use of the word "supposed" seems to implies something. Does it mean you believe it isn't unintentional?

    Please provide feedback on my Nohari and Johari Window by clicking here: Nohari/Johari

    Tri-type 639

  9. #29
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Things like this thread make me believe everyone hates and against me,.even though I.can't.give.proof it's true

  10. #30
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Urarienev View Post
    I don't like hypocrites.
    Hypocrisy is the homage vice pays to virtue.

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