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  1. #11
    Senior Member SubtleFighter's Avatar
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    I think it isn't as precise a term as it should be. Normally I see it said with the meaning of, like you said, "feeling entitled to the wrong things" as opposed to feeling entitled to anything.

    For instance, if you see the super-rich on TV shows throwing a fit because they can't get a designer bag in a specific color by a certain date--when they already have 20 other good bags. That's feeling entitled to get anything they want whenever they want it, no matter how much you already have, which is just stupid. This is what I'd call "entitled."

    To compare, I wouldn't call a middle class family "entitled" for making a plan to save up for a vacation they want. Just wanting more things isn't wrong--but it could become wrong if the family has an over-the-top reaction if they aren't able to go on that vacation after all.

    And also, I wouldn't call a poor person "entitled" for feeling entitled to having three meals a day, every day, even if they became very upset over not having this. Some things are just basic human rights.
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  2. #12
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    A prerequisite amount of entitlement is necessary in life to have appropriate boundaries for oneself- otherwise we’d be far too easy to take advantage of.

    I think when people throw it around cavalierly here as if it’s unequivocally bad, they intend for it to be understood that they’re talking about an inflated sense of entitlement. Where someone has an inflated sense of entitlement- other people are necessarily reduced to objects because not much thought is put into whether or not one’s sense of entitlement is fair.

    I do agree that the terms ‘narcissist’ and ‘entitlement’ are thrown around a lot here…..but this is a psychology forum. On the one hand, it’s strange to me that people would think these terms are thrown around ‘too much’- that’s like thinking the words ‘carburetor’ or ‘transmission’ are overused in an auto repair forum. On the other hand, I do agree that common usage of “entitlement” here in the forums is a bit too obtuse to be as useful as it could be: it's like there's an assumption it should be taken as meaning 'bad', when it's actually daunting to consider how many shades of grey there are (only some of which are 'bad').
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  3. #13
    Theta Male Julius_Van_Der_Beak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    A prerequisite amount of entitlement is necessary in life to have appropriate boundaries for oneself- otherwise we’d be far too easy to take advantage of.

    I think when people throw it around cavalierly here as if it’s unequivocally bad, they intend for it to be understood that they’re talking about an inflated sense of entitlement. Where someone has an inflated sense of entitlement- other people are necessarily reduced to objects because not much thought is put into whether or not one’s sense of entitlement is fair.
    It is hard to know how much thought someone has put into something like that if they are never really asked, however.

    I do agree that the terms ‘narcissist’ and ‘entitlement’ are thrown around a lot here…..but this is a psychology forum. On the one hand, it’s strange to me that people would think these terms are thrown around ‘too much’- that’s like thinking the words ‘carburetor’ or ‘transmission’ are overused in an auto repair forum. On the other hand, I do agree that common usage of “entitlement” here in the forums is a bit too obtuse to be as useful as it could be: it's like there's an assumption it should be taken as meaning 'bad', when it's actually daunting to consider how many shades of grey there are (only some of which are 'bad').
    It's clear to me, that when someone is using the terms "entitled" or " narcissistic" that a value judgement is being applied. Here are some of the things one can act entitled to.

    Food.
    Shelter.
    Respect and decency.
    A fulfilling career.
    Sex.
    Romance.
    Solid gold toothbrushes.
    Beliefs.
    Control.
    Fairness.
    Sperm whale baby meat
    Vegan options for every single meal in every dining location on the planet.
    The success of the political party of your choice
    Indie cred.
    The admiration of others.
    The approval of others.


    Not all of those things need to be bad.
    [Trump's] rhetoric is not an abuse of power. In the same way that it's also not against the law to do a backflip off of the roof of your house onto your concrete driveway. It's just mind-numbingly stupid and, to say the least, counterproductive. - Bush did 9-11


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  4. #14
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by msg_v2 View Post
    Solid gold toothbrushes.
    Exactly.
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  5. #15
    Theta Male Julius_Van_Der_Beak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    Exactly.
    What about a solid gold hammer? I can't think of anything more useful.
    [Trump's] rhetoric is not an abuse of power. In the same way that it's also not against the law to do a backflip off of the roof of your house onto your concrete driveway. It's just mind-numbingly stupid and, to say the least, counterproductive. - Bush did 9-11


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  6. #16
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by msg_v2 View Post
    What about a solid gold hammer? I can't think of anything more useful.
    Well it's a given that this hammer would go with a diamond studded tool-belt, right? Anything else would be tacky, and it should be considered a human birthright to not have to be tacky.


    eta, but worth mentioning: solid gold hammer encrusted with rubies = narcissistic.
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  7. #17
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    A prerequisite amount of entitlement is necessary in life to have appropriate boundaries for oneself- otherwise we’d be far too easy to take advantage of.
    That is very true

    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    I think when people throw it around cavalierly here as if it’s unequivocally bad, they intend for it to be understood that they’re talking about an inflated sense of entitlement. Where someone has an inflated sense of entitlement- other people are necessarily reduced to objects because not much thought is put into whether or not one’s sense of entitlement is fair

    I do agree that the terms ‘narcissist’ and ‘entitlement’ are thrown around a lot here…..but this is a psychology forum. On the one hand, it’s strange to me that people would think these terms are thrown around ‘too much’- that’s like thinking the words ‘carburetor’ or ‘transmission’ are overused in an auto repair forum. On the other hand, I do agree that common usage of “entitlement” here in the forums is a bit too obtuse to be as useful as it could be: it's like there's an assumption it should be taken as meaning 'bad', when it's actually daunting to consider how many shades of grey there are (only some of which are 'bad').
    It bothers me a little when people overuse the term because it loses its significance and real meaning. Issues related to entitlement are relevant in today's society given the growing divide between rich and poor, generational differences, etc. When you throw around a term indiscriminately, it begins to lose its meaning.

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  8. #18
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    I think I agree with the gist of @highlander's question - a sense of entitlement tends to follow from those who feel oppressed or victimized if they think they should be compensated.

    That said, I don't think that a sense of entitlement is a bad thing unless is persists after compensatory measures have been adequately made.

    I personally feel entitled to the ability to think for myself, the ability to consider my feelings as intrinsically "OK", and the ability to speak and stand up for myself if I am abused.

    It seems like entitlement holds some personal qualities - if you feel entitled, then you are under the impression that you have been given permission to own something. However, that doesn't mean that ownership entails the right to do as you please with that which you own.

  9. #19
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    I heard an interesting description of entitlement. The person portrayed it as a continuum. If you learn appropriate obedience to authority, that least to responsibility and ends in taking ownership. If you become accustomed to fighting appropriate authority, it least to irresponsibility and finally, a sense of entitlement. As I applied that idea to a number of different situations I could think of, I believe it rings true.

    Often the people who take the least responsibility also feel unsatisfied with what they are given and display a sense of entitlement - an expectation that they should have much more, without any responsibility to accompany it.

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