our family would be about as functional as the Lannisters
ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
Motivation: Dark Worker
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
MTG Color: black/red
Male Archtype: King/Lover
"You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
"I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire
Can I be a forum granny with lavender hair who plays jazz organ in chunky shoes?
Who wants to be my children and grandchildren?
The first man to raise a fist is the man who's run out of ideas. H.G. WELLS
The first principle is that you must not fool yourself, and you are the easiest person to fool. FEYNMAN If this is monkey pee, you're on your own.SCULLY
With a wife who wouldn't give me the time of day and kids I was unable to control, I'd develop a drinking problem and start staying out at strip clubs long into the night, and come home stinking of Mai-Tais and cheap perfume. Upon arriving home YWIR would viciously question where I've been while I would tell her that, in fact, I was actually just out bowling with the guys baby, that's all, calm down, I don't ask you about your god-damn cell phone bill, and these loud arguments would penetrate, muffled through the drywall, into the children's bedrooms, where they both in their own ways quietly lament the living arrangement, old enough to understand that something was wrong but still young and in need of much guidance, and they would act out their frustrations, getting in fights at school and smoking the dope.
This downward cycle would culminate in my crashing of the family mini-van, reeling from gin, into the suburban neighbors mailbox and causing a scene where, too drunk to form a coherent sentence, I call the neighbor, a 70 year old widow, "a crusty old cat-breeding factory."
After my license suspended and I'm unable to drive to work, Dee would be forced to bring home all the bacon while older sister chana, full of resentment, would be forced to take on the duties of chauffeuring Elfboy around to his lessons after school. Eventually, after a period of sleeping in the garage and listening to a lot of Skynyrd, I would clean up my life and start acting like a husband to my wife and a father to my children.
This upward cycle would culminate in a late night group visit, the whole family, loading up the still dented mini-van and making our way to Denny's. At which point there would be an adorable scene where everyone laughed and smiled and fed each other the whipped cream off their sundaes with spoons across the table while spilling some and giggling. Group hug!!!
This is like the anti-thesis of everything I described my hypothetical relationship with @Rasofy to be in that dating thread, and I love you for it.
Also, @Jaguar adopts @nicolita and teaches her the ways of the assassin. They live from contract to contract in some not wholly unpleasant vagabond existence until Jag is inevitably shot and killed. Nico mourns his passing, and swears revenge. Somewhere, Luc Besson makes millions in royalties.
“That we are capable only of being what we are remains our unforgivable sin.” ― Gene Wolfe
reminder to self: "That YOU that you are so proud of is a story woven together by your interpreter module to account for as much of your behavior as it can incorporate, and it denies or rationalizes the rest." "Who's in Charge? Free Will and the Science of the Brain" by Michael S. Gazzaniga