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  1. #61
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    The chances of having this conversation are slim: very few people are married to their mothers.
    Not in my family.

  2. #62
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    Not in my family.

  3. #63
    Riva
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    Giving a overweight lady your seat in a bus/train thinking she is pregnant.

    Happened to me once.

    Hmm... But that was not what the OP was asking for.

  4. #64
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Your little brother asks: "What is "panini"?"
    You answer: "That's Italian for this sandwich costs $2 extra"

    Prosecuting attorney asks witness: What is your date of birth?
    Witness: July 18
    Attorney: What year?
    Witness: Every year

    Prosecuting attorney states to witness that all of your responses must be oral, and asks: What is your occupation?
    Witness: Oral.

  5. #65
    Just a note... LittleV's Avatar
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    Premise:

    Er: Speaking of mustard… I wonder where it comes from.

    Me: I’m actually not sure where the seed comes from.

    *Er looks at my roommate*

    Er: Where does mustard come from?

    R: Umm… Italy?

    Er: Okay, so, to clarify… ketchup : tomato plant :: mustard : Italy (?)

    R: Maybe Europe…

    Conclusion:

    *Er looks at me and whispers LOUDLY*

    Er: Is she stupid?


    (Maybe I shouldn't have laughed, even if just a little. She understands.)

  6. #66
    Senior Member Stigmata's Avatar
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    While being pulled over

    "Hey, officer. Do me a favor and hold my beer while I look for my license..."

  7. #67
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stigmata View Post
    While being pulled over

    "Hey, officer. Do me a favor and hold my beer while I look for my license..."
    I only drink out of vodka bottles on the car rides -- there's an open-container restriction, and I don't want to spill beer on my lap.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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