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  1. #11
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Hmm. I didn't grow up thinking I was beautiful, but I grew up wanting to be--I always liked the old Hollywood glamorous look, and wished I could look like Lauren Bacall or someone like that. I think that started a tendency to compare myself to others, and find myself lacking. I was definitely not in the popular crowd and not one of the ones that everyone thought were the beauties of the school.

    As an adult, though, I've become more appreciative of my looks, and people generally consider me pretty and assume I grew up "one of the pretty girls." I don't think of myself that way, really, and if anyone makes too big a deal out of my looks, I'm uncomfortable--b/c I feel like saying, "yeah, but did you notice the following flaws?" Sometimes I feel really beautiful/hot, and I accept and embrace every part of myself, so flaws don't feel like flaws--they feel like uniqueness/quirks. Other times, I can totally pick myself apart and not feel very attractive at all. I get frustrated sometimes that I can't maintain the acceptance of myself--but sometimes it's like my mind needs something to analyze, and it might as well be my looks, when there's nothing else to chew on.

    I've always been fascinated and appreciative of human beauty. But it's kind of more like on an artistic appreciation level. I don't choose friends based on looks or anything like that. With guys, I'm actually more likely to be turned off by the super-prettyboy look. I like a face with character in it.

    Looks can help or hurt in the real world. I know I've been judged in the academic world for wearing makeup and reasonably fashionable clothes, etc. In other arenas, that kind of stuff is your ticket in. It's kind of ridiculous, but you learn to play the game.

  2. #12
    almost nekkid scantilyclad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainChick View Post
    scantilyclad...

    FWIW, I find you incredibly attractive. (This fact was crystallized, oddly enough, when I saw your youtube response to the "Two girls one finger" video.)

    You exhibit a radiating "x-factor" feature, that's the best way I can describe it.

    Thank you CaptainChick

    I also think you are incredibly attractive physically, but i think your brain is more attractive.
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  3. #13
    `~~Philosoflying~~` SillySapienne's Avatar
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    I am very lucky in that I've never been one to really compare myself to others, and I think that this fact about me is partially responsible for my relatively high self-esteem.

    Note: My sister who is absolutely beautiful and privileged in more ways than one suffers from an excessive habit of comparing herself to women who she perceives to be "better" than her, and that reeks absolute havoc on her self-esteem. :sad:

    Re: Tallulah about picking yourself apart. I tend to do this too, but more so in regards to my entire person than just my physical appearance. It can be helpful and interesting to a point, but let's just face it, in excess, it can be catastrophically devastating!!!

    A face, in totality, is beautiful and or appealing, and one step further, so is a person.

    Long story short, I believe that when we uber-analyze ourselves and others, we effectively divide and destroy, and conversely, when we step back and synthesize, we appreciate and rejoice!!!
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  4. #14
    only bites when provoked
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainChick View Post
    How long have you thought yourself as being physically unattractive, and what is it about yourself that you find unattractive?
    A long time. Everything.

    Do you have issues with your figure, your face, etc.?
    Yes.

    How important are looks?
    People judge you on them all the time, so probably rather.

    How important is it to feel or not feel physically attractive?
    I have no clue.
    I 100%, N 88%, T 88%, J 75%

    Disclaimer: The above is my opinion and mine alone, it does not mean I cannot change my mind, nor does it guarantee that my comments are related to any deep-seated convictions. Take everything I say with a whole snowplow worth of salt and call me in the morning, if you can.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clover View Post
    It's just that I always compare myself to other girls and think I don't stand a chance around them, there's always someone prettier than me, more fit, taller, thinner, who would settle for me?
    You're super attractive. Mind you, just pictures, but seriously, wow.

    Yes, a few. I have very fussy skin which causes me a lot of woe.
    Eh, everyone has spots on their skin sometimes. It's us really pale people that get the worst effect from it, though.

    I like feeling attractive, but it's mostly for myself. I have to like what I see in the mirror, but I know there's no way I can make other people like it too.
    You should - good stuff!
    I 100%, N 88%, T 88%, J 75%

    Disclaimer: The above is my opinion and mine alone, it does not mean I cannot change my mind, nor does it guarantee that my comments are related to any deep-seated convictions. Take everything I say with a whole snowplow worth of salt and call me in the morning, if you can.

  6. #16
    almost nekkid scantilyclad's Avatar
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    I think you are very cute wolf.
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  7. #17
    Senior Member helen's Avatar
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    How important are looks?
    Probably not very, it's all about the soul shining through. If I love someone or even like them strongly, I think they are good looking by default. I've had the experience of starting out thinking someone was not so great looking, then reversing this decision on a closer acquaintance and vice versa. Obviously it wasn't them changing, only my perceptions.

    How important is it to feel or not feel physically attractive?
    Well, it helps with confidence in some ways. But those who feel they are attractive are probably more prone to be suspicious of attention paid them by would be admirers. "Oh, he's just talking to me because he thinks I'm pretty" kind of thing. It never used to occur to me in my teens, but it does sometimes now and I could live without it.

  8. #18
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    I'M DEAD SEXAY.
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  9. #19
    almost nekkid scantilyclad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jeffster View Post
    I'M DEAD SEXAY.

    we already know this, next person please.
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  10. #20
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Do you think you are physically attractive?

    apparently...


    How long have you thought yourself as being physically attractive and what is it about yourself that you find attractive?



    I never really thought much about my looks until rather recently- I was always the smart girl, my sister was the hot one. Recently though, since I've gotten out of the academic sphere, people have started to focus on my looks instead of my mind- I'm guessing that looks are more important than brains in the real world it seems My boss hired me for my looks instead of my education or intellect (he's one of those people who doesn't think that girls can be smart really ) I get a lot of really positive reactions to my appearance, so I'm guessing that I'm pretty unhideous to behold.

    Personally though, I'm not my type (I totally wouldn't hit on me if I passed me on the street!)


    Do you like your figure, your face, etc.?


    I'm pleased enough with both

    How important are looks?

    I get tips based on how I look, and people are signifigantly less willing to complain about someone who's good looking instead of someone who isn't. I get fewer complaints filed against me than any of my coworkers, but I'm also the only one who gets asked out on dates by the comment system

    As much as I hate it, looks matter a lot. Without them I wouldn't have my job


    How important is it to feel or not feel physically attractive?


    Considering the importance placed upon appearance in our culture, to feel physically attractive is a feeling of power, and to feel less attractive is to feel that you have less power over people. At least in my thoughts.
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

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