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  1. #21
    Senior Member Ism's Avatar
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    I just had a dream that I was about to die. There was this weird thing talking to me in my mind, telling me what to do and say to the people around me to, like, make sure everything went according to plan.

    I remember only feeling that I wish I didn't have to die. Not because of any outright fear, but just because I didn't want to leave so soon. Then again, that's usually the reason for most people, so...

    Point being, I'd wish I didn't have to leave so soon, but I guess it'd be alright.

  2. #22
    ndovjtjcaqidthi
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    Thanks. : )

    My only regret would be that I made too much of an impression on people, or life itself.

    I wouldn't be proud of anything.

    That century's old grave stone at the end of the cemetery, where trees and vegetation have overgrown, hiding it. The one who's name has been erased over time. Belonging to someone whom no one remembers. I want that to be me.

  3. #23
    Senior Member Ism's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saudade View Post
    That century's old grave stone at the end of the cemetery, where trees and vegetation have overgrown, hiding it. The one who's name has been erased over time. Belonging to someone whom no one remembers. I want that to be me.
    That's pretty cool, actually. Do you have a particular reason for why you prefer this over (in a way, I think) sticking around?

  4. #24
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    No, because I haven't yet set up the process I intend to be carried out when I die (liquified into a nutrient and fed to a developing fetus).

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saudade View Post
    Thanks. : )

    My only regret would be that I made too much of an impression on people, or life itself.

    I wouldn't be proud of anything.

    That century's old grave stone at the end of the cemetery, where trees and vegetation have overgrown, hiding it. The one who's name has been erased over time. Belonging to someone whom no one remembers. I want that to be me.
    That's interesting. Even though this makes it so that you relinquish all attachments - bonds, affiliation, etc... in a way, it creates more of a myth surrounding you, by nature of it's oddness/mysteriousness, my eyes avert from the masses of gravestones, and onto yours. So decrepit and lonely, I wonder. :P

  6. #26
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I have thought about where I want to be buried and for awhile I thought I'd want it to be in a place my kids considered home so that it would be convenient for them to visit.

    Then I realized that they aren't very likely to visit my grave (cuz it's kind of pointless) so it might be better if there wasn't a grave for them to potentially feel guilty about not visiting. So maybe I could be scattered somewhere, but I couldn't decide where.

    Then I thought it might be kind of cool to keep my ashes in a recycled pastic margarine dish that they could pass around. But then I pictured them being left in the back of the fridge and accidentally getting thrown instead of the moldy leftover spaghetti (because that's usually what happens to recycled margarine dishes at my house), which wouldn't be a big deal to me, but it might be to one or more of the kids.

    Then I thought I should just probably stop thinking about it because this isn't going anyplace good and I probably shouldn't have been allowed to breed. But I still think I'd like to be put in a recycled margarine dish. Preferably a yellow one.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  7. #27
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    Non, je ne regrette rien. There a few things I'm proud of yes, and I'm pretty sure some people will remember me, even if I died before I wrote a great novel or did something awesome for humanity or had a baby or something. I like to think that the tenacity, passion, and sense of adventure for which I have lived life would inspire even just a very small number of people (say, 2? 3?) then I have lived. I'm sure my nephew would remember me fondly.

    Besides, now that I'm in my 30s instead of 20s I'm a lot less terrified about leaving without earthly glory (perhaps I should reflect and find out why I think I already have accomplished earthly glory? maybe that's why I don't care as much as I almost think I "should") and more concerned about my consciousness being aligned with the divine.

    A roommate of mine said just the other day, "huh what if the big one happened tomorrow and we all died" I was just like "well I would just hope that my soul would be right and I could accept it calmly." I think she found my response unexpected or baffling, from the look on her face, I guess she just thinks differently.

    I'd like for someone to tell my mom what happened to me. I prefer to be cremated and my ashes scattered in the ocean, preferably off the coast of Santa Monica/Venice beach or in North Carolina from Wilmington.

    If I have to die RIGHT NOW, and can't go or do or prepare in any way, but maybe have even an hour, I'd like to go to the house of the guy I'm seeing and die while I'm in bed with him, that would be pretty cool.

    I've always kind of had these thoughts, like I want to die with someone holding me, and if it can't be my lifelong love, it might as well be someone I'm infatuated with.

    Par-tay.

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    Just to add, I think the thing I'd miss the most is discovery and learning. I'm not here to "do" a lot of things. I'm here to absorb.

    It seems that when I think of people who died, it's the first thing I ponder as well. Like "I wish so and so lived along enough to see this" or that. I pity people who purposely destroyed themselves, when they could have fought through some troubles just a little longer, and "discovered" information that would have made life worth living again.
    I agree with that. But sometimes people who die young really end up reaching a lot of people, and a lot of people remember these magnificent bright people who died and left creative works behind (music or writing or something) before they got a chance to become trite or boring, or put out a terrible album.

    Then again you have these legendary people like Veronica Lake, who was this great beauty, who ended up living in run-down hotels and walking the streets and dying of hepatitis and alcoholism at 50, or Dorothy Parker who outlived almost everybody she loved, and was very sad and lonely for it.

    Then you have your Henry Millers of the world. I'd rather be like him. He was really radiating life up until he was 90 something whenever he died. He lived to be old, but also maintained his vitality, he didn't allow himself to be "dead alive."

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Loki View Post
    Yeah. There's nothing meaningful. I haven't impacted anyone. No one has impacted me. Achievements are hollow to me. Loved ones? I feel a detachment and disconnect to my family. I respect and love them, but I deep down it feels hollow. Perhaps respect, no, love, is coming from an inauthentic place. Is it coming from obligation? Or maybe guilt? No. I don't know. I look at the space I occupy in life and feel stuck. I look at these familiar faces and am reminded of failure. I want, but yet it feels pointless in the end. You can only fuck, munch on goodies, have meaningless conversations, get zombified by television, and lost in dreams for so long. Looking back on my death bed, I've lived a life unfulfilled. This cancer known as resentment eats away at me. I've been looking for an answer, but perhaps that's my problem, analysis paralysis that gives an illusion of the answer, but only strengthens inhibition. I just have to do it. Immerse myself in the world and in experiences. Perhaps then I can finally be present and not be engulfed by feelings of frustration and lack.
    Dude, I think you might already be dead.

    YOLO, bro, YOLO.

  10. #30
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    Dude, I think you might already be dead.

    YOLO, bro, YOLO.
    your point is so mainstream.
    loki's got a point
    y'only die once too.
    YODO motha, YODO.
    may as well extend the process and enjoy it a bit.

    (post meant in jest of course, with regard to Loki's troubles)
    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
    06/13 10:51:08 shortnsweet: no you!!
    06/13 10:51:12 shortnsweet: go do your things and my things too!
    06/13 10:51:23 five sounds: oh hell naw
    06/13 10:51:55 shortnsweet: !!!!
    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
    06/13 10:52:19 RiftsWRX: You two are like furbies stuck in a shoe box

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