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  1. #51
    Senior Member Pseudo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    See I find it interesting that people keep mentioning intelligence yet do not actually select their mates for intelligence (relatively speaking).

    In my case pretty much everyone I dated or considered dating for over a month had at least 2, generally 3-4 SD above average in terms of IQ(i know its cliche but its the one rather reliable test in existence, so suck it).

    Don't say you want intelligence if your experience says you always end up with just, normal people.
    Someone intelligent as a selection criteria means you probably automatically rule out(consciously or are just not attracted to, the latter in my case ) between 95 to 99.5 of people based JUST on that factor.


    Can you honestly say that

    I think when people say intelligent they mean "as intelligent as me" nt wanting to have to explain things to their partner or do things for them. I don't think they mean they want the worlds smartest person. So the intelligence factor is determined by the intelligence of the seeker.

  2. #52
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    I can definitely identify with that guy... I know half of the town and they know me- I have a ton of acquaintances and they like me- I can charm the socks off of just about anybody in a couple of minutes and it's all shallow in a way. I have no social life outside of what the man tends to provide and even then I spend half of the time feeling like I don't fit in... I'll go to the casino with a group and end up spending an hour chatting with the security guards instead of anyone I came with

    and too bad you aren't over here... you actually get it!
    oh dont get me started. I used to know the name of all the bartenders, security guards for half of the bars in the city. (I just forgot after changing phones, I have a terrible memory with names and they were written down, more importantly they all remembered me and knew my name)
    It's the, exciting 'other perspective' of a guy who just works there that attracts me I guess. It's insane actually, quite a few people mentioned parties a few days / weeks ago ( i forgot who said what at this point) for NYE. The other friends all went back to europe or other. I, as novacationguy just stay here. and while i know of a few parties I have no fucking clue what i 'll be doing in 2 hours (so 10.20 pm here).

    but if i dont do anything, i 'll get that annoying Fe thing "do people actually like me?' and have to get some kind of external proof.

    I guess, to link to the OP, it'd be easier to just have a girlfriend to remind me that I matter. I've been a bit overly traumatized /scared for life by my last serious one I guess. Maybe.
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
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    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE

  3. #53
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pseudo View Post
    I think when people say intelligent they mean "as intelligent as me" nt wanting to have to explain things to their partner or do things for them. I don't think they mean they want the worlds smartest person. So the intelligence factor is determined by the intelligence of the seeker.
    statistically the seeker is barely able to tie its own shoes without extensive training.
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
    Richard Feynman's last recorded words

    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE

  4. #54
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    oh dont get me started. I used to know the name of all the bartenders, security guards for half of the bars in the city. (I just forgot after changing phones, I have a terrible memory with names and they were written down, more importantly they all remembered me and knew my name)
    It's the, exciting 'other perspective' of a guy who just works there that attracts me I guess. It's insane actually, quite a few people mentioned parties a few days / weeks ago ( i forgot who said what at this point) for NYE. The other friends all went back to europe or other. I, as novacationguy just stay here. and while i know of a few parties I have no fucking clue what i 'll be doing in 2 hours (so 10.20 pm here).

    but if i dont do anything, i 'll get that annoying Fe thing "do people actually like me?' and have to get some kind of external proof.

    I guess, to link to the OP, it'd be easier to just have a girlfriend to remind me that I matter. I've been a bit overly traumatized /scared for life by my last serious one I guess. Maybe.
    I worked business sales for 2 1/2 years... it's a GOOD way to know everyone

    but yeah, lost a lot of numbers in phone switching, and if people want me they have to call me and then it depends on whether or not I'm in the mood to pick up

    I guess that's a benefit of having a significant other in a way... you always have someone there I went for someone who is just as independent as I am, so that's always an adventure in a way... he accepts my habits of disappearing from time to time to do my own thing and I accept that he'll do the same thing and when the town is REALLY unlucky, we team up together and go out, which means that there's 2 people who both want to chat with strangers, though he's the warmer one. it's nice to know that there's someone who likes you best though
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  5. #55
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    I worked business sales for 2 1/2 years... it's a GOOD way to know everyone

    but yeah, lost a lot of numbers in phone switching, and if people want me they have to call me and then it depends on whether or not I'm in the mood to pick up

    I guess that's a benefit of having a significant other in a way... you always have someone there I went for someone who is just as independent as I am, so that's always an adventure in a way... he accepts my habits of disappearing from time to time to do my own thing and I accept that he'll do the same thing and when the town is REALLY unlucky, we team up together and go out, which means that there's 2 people who both want to chat with strangers, though he's the warmer one. it's nice to know that there's someone who likes you best though
    Alright. just called an acquaintance. i have a villa party for tonight.

    Yeah well, my half-hearted search for a SO that can understand how it makes sense that im both extremely accepting and a total, absolute asshole (the entj i mentioned thinks im a bigger asshole than he is) is still ongoing.
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
    Richard Feynman's last recorded words

    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE

  6. #56
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    Alright. just called an acquaintance. i have a villa party for tonight.

    Yeah well, my search for an SO that can understand how it makes sense that im both extremely acceptant and a total, absolute asshole (the entj i mentioned thinks im a bigger asshole than he is) is still ongoing.
    the key is to find someone who LIKES guys who are assholes... the boyfriend has pointed out a few times that he's always had a thing for bitchy women and has always found the villainess to be much hotter than the girl next door... more of a snappy dialogue, no need to be sappy sweet ... I rest, reassured, that my bitchiness is an accepted attribute in the relationship

    funny how some of the people on here who are assholes in real life can come across as perfectly normal on the forum and vice versa
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  7. #57
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    the key is to find someone who LIKES guys who are assholes... the boyfriend has pointed out a few times that he's always had a thing for bitchy women and has always found the villainess to be much hotter than the girl next door... more of a snappy dialogue, no need to be sappy sweet ... I rest, reassured, that my bitchiness is an accepted attribute in the relationship

    funny how some of the people on here who are assholes in real life can come across as perfectly normal on the forum and vice versa
    We're a select bunch

    My last date kept saying that I was NOT a nice guy, which i'd have to agree with. A girl who was interested in me before going away due to my interest being restricted to talking to her brought up some stuff about personality which seemed to correlate mostly ENFP or INFJ mbti wise, i was puzzled. She thought of me as some sort of gandhi. (it's actually a pattern in me, if ppl are willing to talk to me, and exchange stuff only then will i start classifying them as attractive or not, its weird, yes)

    I think the reason Im attracted to much above average intelligence in a partner is that much of the stuff i think about is a mix of selfish interest/'cold' logical analysis and macro trends. I even think of selfishness in macro terms. That takes quite a bit of interest in discourse or/and N type intelligence to understand and appreciate.

    people who do not think at this level of breath (i dont blame them or think its bellow contempt if they dont, but i wont be particularly interested either) do not understand how to link what seems to be nearly sociopathicly cold reasoning and seemingly totally altruistic trends in me. I can explain of course because i 've worked toward being who I am, but I doubt it interests many people.
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
    Richard Feynman's last recorded words

    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE

  8. #58
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    We're a select bunch :coffee

    My last date kept saying that I was NOT a nice guy, which i'd have to agree with. A girl who was interested in me before going away due to my interest being restricted to talking to her and brought up some F stuff about personality which seemed to correlated mostly ENFP or INFJ mbti wise, i was puzzled. She thought of me as some sort of gandhi. (it's actually a pattern in me, if ppl are willing to talk to me, and exchange stuff only then will i start classifying them as attractive or not, its weird, yes)

    I think the reason Im attracted to much above average intelligence in a partner is that much of the stuff i think about is a mix of selfish interest and macro trends. I even think of selfishness in macro terms. That takes quite a bit of interest in discourse or/and N type intelligence to understand and appreciate.

    people who do not think at this level of breath (i dont blame them or think its bellow contempt if they dont, but i wont be particularly interested either) do not understand how to link what seems to be nearly sociopathicly cold reasoning and seemingly totally altruistic trends in me. I can explain of course because i 've worked toward being who I am, but I doubt it interests many people.
    I've actually dated some people who would be classified by the board as SJs who were perfectly content to debate topics such as social interactions and trends, conventional and non-conventional morality and that some thoughts that are horrifyingly cold on the surface are actually driven by the best interest of humanity in general... it was an interesting perspective in a way, one person bringing warp and one weft to build a decent conversation... it's surprising where conversations can come from and where they go- as if they've taken on a life of their own- in a way, it's less about type and more about curiosity and curiosity is a trait that anyone can have but too few truly show

    though I've dated some truly squishy feely types who ended up thinking that I was fascinating, but perhaps the devil incarnate... and I have certain tendencies that would lead them to think that
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  9. #59
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    I've actually dated some people who would be classified by the board as SJs who were perfectly content to debate topics such as social interactions and trends, conventional and non-conventional morality and that some thoughts that are horrifyingly cold on the surface are actually driven by the best interest of humanity in general... it was an interesting perspective in a way, one person bringing warp and one weft to build a decent conversation... it's surprising where conversations can come from and where they go- as if they've taken on a life of their own- in a way, it's less about type and more about curiosity and curiosity is a trait that anyone can have but too few truly show

    though I've dated some truly squishy feely types who ended up thinking that I was fascinating, but perhaps the devil incarnate... and I have certain tendencies that would lead them to think that
    told ya. we'd make great partners in crime.

    the entj i befriended, despite freakish intelligence and blablalba, is quite low N and has, I think, more Ne than a 'hardcore entj'. but he does the whole 'thinking before talking' of the Ni types.

    i'd actually love to work with him as our skills are very complimentary.

    i've noticed that quite a few of the people that interested me these days were not 'cliche' mbti types but more like borderline rare mutant breeds, enfps with low P, entjs with below av. E, N and J, istjs with high N... or to connect to the thread someone like you, a high N yet estp person
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
    Richard Feynman's last recorded words

    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE

  10. #60
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    Based on your list, we should be dating.

    I'm just saying.

    How YOU doin?

    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    told ya. we'd make great partners in crime.
    This is about the relationship I want. I've always used this as an example... Well. That and these two:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1zMp43KcT0

    I just find them deliciously in love in their own deformed way. (The story isn't about love at all. XD)
    Kantgirl: Just say "I'm feminine and I'll punch anyone who says otherwise!"
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