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Thread: Anger/Hatred

  1. #11
    hyggelig Array EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    173 so/sx


    I think I overuse the word "hate". I say that I hate things on a regular basis. I hate cantaloupe. I hate people who cut in front of me in line. I hate the apartment above mine and how they're always having parties. But I don't know if I actually hate anything. I have a hard time distinguishing, within myself, the fine lines between frustration and anger and hate. They all build up and make me blow up, in the T-ish way that @metalmommy talked about.

    I tend to be fairly self-controlled, like @Saturned, but the only times that I actively allow myself to rage at/about things, i.e. to let myself be verbally angry without self-censorship, are when I know that I'm in the right and I know that it's justified. Which makes me a pretty typical 1, I guess, in that I almost like letting anger out too much, to keep it in all the time. The catharsis feels too good.
    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do

    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw or gryffindor (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  2. #12
    Senior Member Array Jaguar's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    I hate cantaloupe.
    Think of all the potassium it gives you. No good deed goes unpunished. Hater!
    If this is the best of possible worlds, what then are the others?
    ― Voltaire, Candide

  3. #13
    lurking Array Rasofy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    5w6 sp/sx


    Contempt and frustration are much more common; anger and hatred aren't very sustainable emotions for me.

  4. #14


    I was once angry at a friend. He, a girl I was seeing, and I all hung out, and immediately I could tell there was something between the two. About two weeks after they met, he biked over to my house to tell me they were dating. I went inside and paced around my room for a bit, culminating in punching something and hurting my hand.

    Thinking back though, what a good friend. Not many would have done what he did, and I suppose that's why we still hang out nine years later.

    When I was young, me and my father would spar. He obviously would always win, but I feel he would try just hard enough to let me think I was getting close... I remember being so frustrated at my inability to gain ground against him I would burst out in tears of anger trying to strike him. Never worked.

    As for hate..... perhaps I will try another post down the thread.

  5. #15
    Meat Tornado Array DiscoBiscuit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009


    It's always there.
    Your representative owes you, not his industry only, but his judgment; and he betrays, instead of serving you, if he sacrifices it to your opinion.
    - Edmund Burke

    8w9 sx/so

  6. #16
    Reptilian Array Snuggletron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by jontherobot View Post
    I was once angry at a friend. He, a girl I was seeing, and I all hung out, and immediately I could tell there was something between the two. About two weeks after they met, he biked over to my house to tell me they were dating. I went inside and paced around my room for a bit, culminating in punching something and hurting my hand.
    How close was 'seeing' in this case?

  7. #17
    Charting a course Array
    Join Date
    Jan 2009


    Have you felt anger recently?
    Yes. As DB said, it's always there. Smoldering, just waiting to explode into flame.

    And for most of my life I've kept it hidden away, till it would explode like Krakatoa.

  8. #18
    darkened dreams Array labyrinthine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    4 sx/sp
    INFp None


    I don't sustain feelings of anger, but can have an immediate reaction of frustration/anger if someone is crossing a line, being unfair, being hurtful, etc. I naturally detach to be analytical and so it doesn't last long because I understand that every effect is the result of a cause, so being angry at a destructive/hateful person is similar to being angry at the damaging effects of a tornado. I realize that anger is more of an expenditure of my own energy and so it doesn't hold up once reasoned.

    As far as hate, I think I have had opportunity to deal with it at a fundamental level. There was someone in my early life that tried to kill my mother and brother. I have spent a couple of decades dealing with where to put that in my head and I don't hate, although I view such a person as a rabid, diseased animal. I feel very protective of myself and others because I know the illness of hate and anger are very contagious and harmful.

    When I feel anger towards someone I ask myself: 'Would I want to trade places and feel what they are feeling?" The answer is "No". When I realize that it sparks a sense of their humanity and suffering, so it is possible to distance myself and realize that anger/hate is an illness and people who feel and act upon it should be given a cautious compassion.
    Last edited by labyrinthine; 09-17-2012 at 07:36 AM.
    The first man to raise a fist is the man who's run out of ideas. H.G. WELLS
    The first principle is that you must not fool yourself, and you are the easiest person to fool. FEYNMAN

    If this is monkey pee, you're on your own.SCULLY

  9. #19


    Quote Originally Posted by Snuggletron View Post
    How close was 'seeing' in this case?

    Not very, perhaps a month of dating twice a week or so.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Array Pseudo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    5w4 so/sx


    The last time I felt angry was at my dad. I'd missed some of his calls so he did an all out communications assault on me . Several calls, texts e-mails liking over teeny of my photos on Facebook. I get angry when he seems to be demanding my attention like this. He's done it before. I don't like being at people's neck and call. I don't like talking on the phone. Also he wasn't around from when I was six so even though I know he's sorry it makes me resentful that I'm some how obligated to see him and talk to him.

    It's bad of me. I think a combination oft not wanting to be control and some lingering resentment towards him.

    I also felt anger at my friend the other day because I felt like since she's been married she doesn't want to do anything interesting. Just have dinners and decorate her house. Also I always over there and they've never come to hang out t my place. It makes me resentful because I'm Te one always makin the 40 minute drive and it's always to do boringthings! I don't why being married has sins deny turned them into 90 year old people.

    I don't think I really hate anything.


    I get really angry about no being able to call out unfairness. At work or at school when your grade or job depends on just doing what someone says. Generally my outward release for this is ripping paper into smaller and smaller peices. It lets me be destructive in away but also calms me down by being sor of sutatic. Fold rip fold rip fold rip.

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