Squeaky and Huey,
Two cats at war,
One blocks the litter boxes,
So the other shits on the floor.
It would be a small problem,
Hardly a care,
If I did not walk around,
On feet that are bare.
But barefoot I am,
And barefoot I was,
When my foot it did squish,
In shit covered with fuzz.
A casualty of war,
In bombings of stink,
A refugee in the bathroom,
Washing her fucking foot in the sink.
"Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get, but if you work really hard, and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you...amazing things will happen" --Conan O'Brien
Some corporate bigwigs are supposed to visit my store tomorrow, so my manager asked me to clean the breakroom, generally make sure it was presentable. Little did she know that I had implemented a weekly cleaning schedule last Monday and I had already scrubbed ALL THE THINGS, like a boss. I told her this, said I even disinfected the water cooler and scrubbed out the refrgierator. She was happy that I did all this without being asked and looked like this:
I then went on to say, "I was also going to rearrange the breakroom to make more efficient use of our limited space. If you'd like, I can do that now, too. Here, I drew a picture!" And I whipped out of my pocket a detailed sketch I had made that morning of my proposed breakroom redesign, complete with accurate distance perspective and labels accounting for everything down to the trash bin.
She barked out a surprised WTF kind of laugh, then stared at me oddly for a moment, and then gave me permission to spend the rest of my shift in the back to make the changes.
I get the impression that my manager thinks me odd. :P Ah well.
Never wrestle with a pig. You will get dirty and the pig will enjoy it.
two nights ago I went out with the guy I like, we went to this hole in the wall club where they were having open mic night it was byob so we split a pint of gin and a 20 oz sprite. and than we smoked, and i was non functional in terms of driving for 2 hours, so we hung out in this private room in the back and just chilled. I had a great time and he said he did to, and made me text him when i got home to made sure i made it home safely.
I remember driving home and i was fine to drive, if i wasn't i wouldn't have driven it's a hard fast rule of mine. but i do not remember getting out of my clothes and getting into pajamas.
and than today i ran out of cigs, and now i'm making corned beef for dinner.
Woke up at 4 or so to head down and help set up the banding station for the fall. Rebar, metal poles, mist nets, the wafting odour of the cormorant colony, and tens of thousands of red ants were involved.
yesterday I woke up went to a family therapist appointment, than I went to perkin's with my dad had the country fried steak and eggs got the muffin to go. than i got $20 from my mom and put $13 of it into my bank account, than i went to the Blue Monkey where someone bought me a cup of chili, than I helped someone move. Than i visited with the guy I like we drank some gin and smoked some resin, than he gave me a massage which lead into foreplay than actual sex, than we showered together. than i came home and made reubens.