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  1. #1
    Vulnerability Eilonwy's Avatar
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    Default What should I tell the veterinarian?

    Background info: When I moved here, I took both of my cats to Vet A, whom I like. He is willing to discuss options with me, will listen when I say I can't afford something and try to offer me cheaper options, and so far has done a good job.

    I started bringing one of my cats to Vet B because he offers laser treatments that have actually helped my cat's arthritis. Vet A doesn't offer these treatments, and is aware that I'm going to Vet B for them.

    Vet B is some flavor of TJ. He pressures me to do what he thinks is best, regardless of cost or my wishes. He made adjustments to some of my cat's arthritis meds and when I asked for a refill of those meds, he refused and tried to get me to try a different med that my cat had previously tried and refused to take. Vet B pushed for me to get the medicine in a different flavor and try again, but experience has taught me that if it tastes that bad in one flavor, it's not going to taste any better in another. I told him I was not going to throw another $30 into the trash and that I wanted the old medicine. He still refused.

    Vet B is also pressuring me to transfer my cat to his practice for all treatments, not just the arthritis. I have not been able to find a diplomatic, yet honest way to tell him that I don't want to do that because his personality is off-putting to me. I need to not insult him because the laser treatments really help my cat in a way no other treatment does, and he's the only vet that offers them in this area, but I want him to back off and a simple "no" hasn't done the trick. Any suggestions?
    Johari / Nohari

    “That we are capable only of being what we are remains our unforgivable sin.” ― Gene Wolfe

    reminder to self: "That YOU that you are so proud of is a story woven together by your interpreter module to account for as much of your behavior as it can incorporate, and it denies or rationalizes the rest." "Who's in Charge? Free Will and the Science of the Brain" by Michael S. Gazzaniga

  2. #2
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    He, as a service provider, is subordinate to you, the consumer of his service.

    You can dictate what it is you talk to him about. If he brings up something you don't want to talk about, just say "I've voiced my thoughts on the matter and they haven't changed." Or..."I do not want to do x, for personal reasons."

    It's a business relationship, you are always in control.

  3. #3
    Vulnerability Eilonwy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xisnotx View Post
    He, as a service provider, is subordinate to you, the consumer of his service.
    Tell that to him. He didn't get the memo.

    "I do not want to do x, for personal reasons."
    This holds promise. Thanks!
    Johari / Nohari

    “That we are capable only of being what we are remains our unforgivable sin.” ― Gene Wolfe

    reminder to self: "That YOU that you are so proud of is a story woven together by your interpreter module to account for as much of your behavior as it can incorporate, and it denies or rationalizes the rest." "Who's in Charge? Free Will and the Science of the Brain" by Michael S. Gazzaniga

  4. #4
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    If he is a TJ, just state bluntly and politely: I appreciate your advice, help and your zeal to help me out, and I understand that you mean well, but I do need you to respect my doubt and final decisions on this matter, as I *am* the owner. The laser treatments you provide are great, and for that I will definitely be returning here, but I am perfectly happy with my other vet on other matters and I need you to respect that. I heard you, I know where you stand, now I need you to hear me and acknowledge that I made my decision and it is final.

    Smile, make sure he realizes you're serious, and that you will stand your ground with polite directness. After that, interact with him as if nothing has happened and make the next appointment for the laser treatments, as it should signal to him that this is a done matter, and you're not holding any grudges and neither should he (nor try that shit again).
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





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  5. #5
    Senior Member Ism's Avatar
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    I told him I was not going to throw another $30 into the trash and that I wanted the old medicine. He still refused.
    Lol, he sounds like a big asshole. Sorry he's the only one who can offer anything for your cat. =/

    I agree with Xisnotx, though. He sounds right. Maybe you just haven't been blunt/acted personally offended enough. They're obligated to do whatever you want, then. :P

  6. #6
    Vulnerability Eilonwy's Avatar
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    Thanks, @Amargith and @Ism.

    I wasn't sure how blunt I could get with a TJ and not cross over into offensive. Thanks for everyone's suggestions. They helped me figure out how to say what I need to say.
    Johari / Nohari

    “That we are capable only of being what we are remains our unforgivable sin.” ― Gene Wolfe

    reminder to self: "That YOU that you are so proud of is a story woven together by your interpreter module to account for as much of your behavior as it can incorporate, and it denies or rationalizes the rest." "Who's in Charge? Free Will and the Science of the Brain" by Michael S. Gazzaniga

  7. #7
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    Just say no and don't feel about it.

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