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  1. #1
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Default Why are people nice?

    Ive been wondering about this for a while.

    I dont like the connotations of 'being nice'? It always seems like some manipulative attempt at getting others to like a person.

    But why are people 'nice'? What does nice even mean? If im honest Id rather have 100 complete cucking funts who were decent in action than 1 person who was nice in words and demeanor.

    Can anyone tell me? Is there a point to niceness that isnt mired in manipulation?
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  2. #2
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Default

    trust me it's not a manipulative way to get people to like me. i usually don't give a fuck if someone likes me, i just find it more natural personally than being a complete bitch.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  3. #3
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    Can anyone tell me? Is there a point to niceness that isnt mired in manipulation?
    People are susceptible to give consideration to an alternate way of understanding.

  4. #4
    Member midnightstar's Avatar
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    It's because being nice doesn't cause trouble
    “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”
    ― Anne Frank
    "How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on... when in your heart you begin to understand... there is no going back?" - Lord of the Rings
    "I'll keep you locked in my head until we meet again " Pink - Who Knew

  5. #5
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oakysage View Post
    People are susceptible to give consideration to an alternate way of understanding.
    So all is fair in love and war? Well I suppose Oaky, but I dont know, I find it hard to get past my view of this.

    I think im just projecting my own negative view of my style of dealing with people, it's completely fabricated and I cant deal with that. It OUGHT to be genuine but it isn't.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  6. #6
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    So all is fair in love and war? Well I suppose Oaky, but I dont know, I find it hard to get past my view of this.
    If you value a person and wish for them to value you back, hostility is a sign of disrespect and holds little value in mutual care. If you value a person's thoughts and wish for them to elaborate, hostility will hold the individual on the defense which will cause a greater deal of difficulty in understanding the way they enjoy perceiving things in the world.

  7. #7
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oakysage View Post
    If you value a person and wish for them to value you back, hostility is a sign of disrespect and holds little value in mutual care. If you value a person's thoughts and wish for them to elaborate, hostility will hold the individual on the defense which will cause a greater deal of difficulty in understanding the way they enjoy perceiving things in the world.
    But what about if the hostility is actually the true value? I think it was a specific type of niceness I was talking about maybe. I just dont get it, why would I be nice to anyone, but I am...regardless and I hate it.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  8. #8
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by midnightstar View Post
    It's because being nice doesn't cause trouble
    Yeah, it just prevents overt conflicts that could be damaging to the goals and/or the well-being (physical, emotional, mental) of the people involved.

    Some people also actually don't enjoy conflict; it scares, unsettles, or disturbs them.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  9. #9
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Yeah, it just prevents overt conflicts that could be damaging to the goals and/or the well-being (physical, emotional, mental) of the people involved.

    Some people also actually don't enjoy conflict; it scares, unsettles, or disturbs them.
    Yeah I suppose, but I already sortov get that, but I dont understand somewhat of my own need to be nice, or natural inclination to be so. I dislike it because internally I value conflict where I perceive it to be necessary, but I dont seem able to force that out.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  10. #10
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    But what about if the hostility is actually the true value? I think it was a specific type of niceness I was talking about maybe. I just dont get it, why would I be nice to anyone, but I am...regardless and I hate it.
    Not being genuine in the way you project yourself to others will hold a number of views. One would say it would limit the drama caused if one were far more genuine in showing their emotions towards someone. Pointless drama is not necessarily the most wonderful thing. Another would say it's simply a matter of respectful behaviour which would be genuine in the sense that you yourself have the value of holding to professional mannerisms no matter the situation. A third could say that if he were to project a sense of resentment towards another individual, the other individual could cause uncertain damage to any particular aspect of the individual's life and so a fear of such would be present. It could simply be job position, health risk, family threats and all the other possible things a malicious individual could accomplish.

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