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  1. #41
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009


    I did just find out she hadn't turned in her science homework that was due on wednesday. Her best friend didn't either. I asked her friend why she didn't turn it in and she said it's because she doesn't "like" science. So apparently she's making friends who don't turn in their work either. (I really like the kid though, she's nice and aud needs nice)

  2. #42


    Quote Originally Posted by Patches View Post
    My brother (ISTP) used to have a similar problem in elementary school. It escalated to the point where he was given a Student Planner which he had to write all of his assignments in. At the end of the school day, his teacher had to sign that day in the planner (to confirm that all assignments were written down). When he was home, our parents had to sign that day in the planner to confirm that they had seen the planner/assignments.

    Then it was just on my parents to make sure he completed all of his assignments while he was home now that they were well informed about what exactly he had to do.
    This is pretty much what most private schools here do & I'd have prolly done waaaaaaaaay less h/w in primary school were it not for this measure.

  3. #43
    lab rat extraordinaire CrystalViolet's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    5w4 sx/sp


    At least she attends class. I'd simply just wouldn't go to classes I didn't have an interest in, and /or deemed useful. I was a pretty good kid though, so most of my teachers ignored it, except the more anal ones. I did go through a stage of not handing assignments in. I wouldn't recommend my mother's methods though, although it did work. I mastered the art of coasting though.
    Currently submerged under an avalanche of books and paper work. I may come back up for air from time to time.
    Real life awaits and she is a demanding mistress.


  4. #44


    Damn, I relate.

    Nothing would have fixed my lethargic attitude towards school.

  5. #45
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    497 sx/so
    IEE Fi


    Sounds familiar.

    I loved the teachers, as they were adults and not as moronic as my peers in their behavior, and I was cooperative in class as well...i was there, forced to be there, might as well just keep myself busy, but I resented homework. Fuck, I just spent 7 hours at that school, plus commuting to come home and what, again be forced to do something I didn't decide to do myself? Really? And so, yeah, the second I came home, I forgot about schoolwork. Pushed it aside really.

    I did not want to be longer in school than I needed to though, so I gamed the system just enough to pass. Drove my ISFJ mom batty like that every year as she was terrified Id fail. I ended up doing some of the homework (not all of it) during my recess and on the train to school, since I was already trapped during that time. Might as well keep the teachers somewhat off my back.

    But I refused to do any work at home, on principle. Basic 'screw them and their fucking demands' -attitude.

    For me, it was basically the lack of choice in it. You're a kid and you'll do as you re told never really stuck with me. It helps to somewhat help them explore the options in school, to give some freedom in their choice of school, direction and classes they can take, I think. And to somehow make a reasonable argument for the classes they have to take, besides the 'thats the rules'-argument.

    I couldnt even bother to look at a subject I considered uninteresting and useless. But if someone explained to me how it would come in handy later on, pique my curiosity as to how it fit into the larger overview of the world, what you could do with it and how it fitted in with other subjects? That was a different matter!

    i very much enjoy studying, i am in fact an eternal student. But, i decide when and where and how much. And what. Definitely what. And i have no problem with subjects that are less interesting *as long as* I can see the relevance of them to what Im trying to accomplish.

    School basically pushed every rebellious button I had. And so I repaid it with obstinance. In fact, I prided myself in it, while gaming the system by knowing my teachers so well that I knew what they'd ask at the finals (so I only had to study 1/8 of the material), and making them want to give me the benefit of the doubt, when I was late with an assignment or even letting me off the hook entirely.

    ....funny enough, those skills do also serve you well after school, so in a way school taught me plenty

    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  6. #46
    Retired Nicki's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010


    Teachers are usually strict about things that don't matter. Maybe your kid should ask for extra credit? That could really help.
    I really like cats and food.

  7. #47
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    5w6 sx/so


    Art is all about keeping up a flow, and if you don't follow or even resist the currents, then it is only inevitable that you will fail; that's exactly what happened to me - movement is where it's at in artistic success rather than stagnation.

    In other words, if you don't do anything, you will fail art.

  8. #48
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    5 sx


    Quote Originally Posted by Poimandres View Post
    Art is all about keeping up a flow, and if you don't follow or even resist the currents, then it is only inevitable that you will fail; that's exactly what happened to me - movement is where it's at in artistic success rather than stagnation.

    In other words, if you don't do anything, you will fail art.
    This is a good point and I think it applies to any other class, too. I went through a phase where I gradually stopped doing any coursework and eventually even the easiest assignments began to look overwhelming. You just have to motivate herself to get back into that rhythm.

    I read something recently about how procrastination isn't as much a sign of laziness as a sign of shaky confidence. i.e. if a child has received a lot of praise during the early part of her education, the weight of others' expectations can be nerve-wracking. This is true for me, and I wonder if it might be your daughter's situation too.

  9. #49

  10. #50
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    1w2 sp/so
    EIE Fe


    Your daughter sounds like me when I was in elementry school, and when I was 12 it was at its worst. If she is anything like me, nothing will fix her, or make her stop.

    I just didn't care. When I was at school, I tried, and liked being there. When I was done, I was done. I did not want to do homework, studying, projects, independent learning. Home was home, school was school, and I did not want them to mix at all. I was a very bright child, but just didn't try. Why? I was lazy. I had no reason. I turned it into a game where I just manipulated shit to minimize how much extra work I had to do, and then never did it. I had TV taken away, wasn't allowed to play, couldn't draw, read, anything. All I was allowed to do was homework. Did I do it? Nope. It was something I so profoundly did not want to do that there wasn't a single thing that could motivate me. I was super stressed, cried about it all the time. I raged, stormed, lied etc. I was truly miserable, but it was never enough to get me to actually do it. Granted, I had a lot (A LOT) of social problems, and was on an antidepressant I didn't need for most of it.

    I failed reading in 7th grade, and had to do summer school. That failure didn't so much bother me. I was just glad to be done with 7th grade. I did summer school, and cause I realized that if I didn't do it, then I would have to repeat 7th grade, I did it. It was also the ONLY thing I had to do. I wasn't overwhelmed with assigments I loathed and felt were boring and useless. Or worse; busy redundant work. I passed with flying colors. Then I changed school districts.

    What truly "saved me" was getting to hit a big fat giant reset button. New school, new standards, new friends, new teachers, no history about me. A truly clean slate. From that point on I was a great student, and I gained the maturity level to self motivate and learn. That, and the material in 8th grade finally started to be interesting to me. And there was WAY less "pointless" assignments.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
    Functions: Fe > Te > Ni > Se > Si > Ti > Fi > Ne
    Enneagram: 1w2 - 3w4 - 6w5 (The Taskmaster) | sp/so
    Socionics: β-E dimer | -
    Big 5: slOaI
    Temperament: Choleric/Melancholic
    Alignment: Lawful Neutral
    External Perception: Nohari and Johari

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