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  1. #1
    Member Emerald Rain's Avatar
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    Default Why do I find myself fascinated/ infatuated with this girl?

    Even though I know I can never have her?


    I've never met her in person.
    She posts online in another forum.
    She's bubbly, an ENFJ...yes, she took the test.

    We've exchanged couple of messages, I have her on Skype, but I'm afraid to talk to her as I don't know what might happen. She knows my intention. she also knows other guys in that forum are also equally fascinated with her. So far I've been trying hard to eliminate the thoughts of her as I know I will never meet her.

    I try to think of this logically, but it still doesn't help. I still find myself wanting her. What can I do to eliminate the thoughts of her?

  2. #2
    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    If you got her on Skype, she must like you enough to give that out....So I recommend talking to her--going with your heart. Love/affection is irrational. The only way out is through it.
    Ni/Ti/Fe/Si
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    The more one loves God, the more it is that having nothing in the world means everything, and the less one loves God, the more it is that having everything in the world means nothing.

    Do not resist an evil person, but to him who strikes you on the one cheek, offer also the other. ~Matthew 5:39

    songofmary.wordpress.com


  3. #3
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    Um, talk to her and get to know her. You might get closer, or you might at least get over her.

  4. #4
    Let me count the ways Betty Blue's Avatar
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    Why can you never have her? (not that having is the best want)
    Is it an expectation you have put on yourself...or is she with someone already... it makes a big difference.
    "We knew he was someone who had a tragic flaw, that's where his greatness came from"

  5. #5
    Member Emerald Rain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    If you got her on Skype, she must like you enough to give that out....So I recommend talking to her--going with your heart. Love/affection is irrational. The only way out is through it.
    She seems to like everybody, so I'm not special. I've contemplated writing her a lengthy pm explaining my feelings toward her, and get it over with. I'm not sure if I can express myself properly over skype.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Um, talk to her and get to know her. You might get closer, or you might at least get over her.
    At this point I just want this wanting to stop. I feel agitated at myself for wanting someone I've never met.







    I really hate my mind.

  6. #6
    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emerald Rain View Post
    She seems to like everybody, so I'm not special. I've contemplated writing her a lengthy pm explaining my feelings toward her, and get it over with. I'm not sure if I can express myself properly over skype.
    Yes. Do it. I think communication is the only/best way.

    And let us know how it goes if you do!
    Ni/Ti/Fe/Si
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    ~Torah observant, Christ inspired~
    Life Path 11

    The more one loves God, the more it is that having nothing in the world means everything, and the less one loves God, the more it is that having everything in the world means nothing.

    Do not resist an evil person, but to him who strikes you on the one cheek, offer also the other. ~Matthew 5:39

    songofmary.wordpress.com


  7. #7
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    crybate?

    I'm kidding. I have an unrequited crush too so I sympathize.

  8. #8
    Member Emerald Rain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HelenOfTroy View Post
    Why can you never have her? (not that having is the best want)
    Is it an expectation you have put on yourself...or is she with someone already... it makes a big difference.
    It's an expectation I've put on myself. I don't feel like I can ever get her.
    Also,
    She lives in the USA




    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    Yes. Do it. I think communication is the only/best way.

    And let us know how it goes if you do!
    I will do that.

  9. #9
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
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    I would venture to guess that you enjoy not being able to get her. The agony is so wonderfully painful.

    If everyone wants her maybe that leaves open someone that isn't so universally amazing that you are ignoring because you are focusing on someone you think is out of your league?

    Or, since you have her skype:

    Will: Yeah, I went on a date last week.
    Sean: How'd it go?
    Will: It was good.
    Sean: Going out again?
    Will: I don't know.
    Sean: Why not?
    Will: Haven't called her.
    Sean: Christ, you're an amateur.
    Will: I know what I'm doing.
    Sean: Yeah.
    Will: Yeah. Don't worry about me. I know what I'm doin'. Yeah, but this girl is like, you know, beautiful. She's smart. She's funny. She's different from most of the other girls I've been with.
    Sean: So, call her up, Romeo.
    Will: Why? So I can realize she's not that smart, that she's fuckin' boring? Y'know--I mean...this girl is like fuckin' perfect right now, I don't wanna ruin that.
    Sean: Maybe you're perfect right now. Maybe you don't want to ruin that.

  10. #10
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Dude, you can't have her. Repeat that to yourself a million times. So you need to just get over it now, NOT write her a sappy PM getting yourself deeper into the dismal abyss.

    Find someone in Canadialand.

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