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  1. #71
    Member DisneyFanGirl's Avatar
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    I really hate mean people and if they don't respect me, I don't respect them. I can be a bit manipulative if I feel the person deserves it. I also can get a bit prejudiced if several people who have things in common are mean to me; I'll just avoid them and think that all people who have that one thing in common are jerks (I knew a few horrible ESTJs and for a while I thought all ESTJs were complete jerks, not anymore now I've realized it was just those people). I also really hate math and anyone who tries to get me to understand or force me to do it will see a completely different side of me. I hate housework and my house is a mess. I also really REALLY hate off key singing. So if you can't sing on key, I'm pretty likely to tell you to stop. I'm working on not being so harsh.

  2. #72
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    These are what I have heard -

    Aloof. I think this is a very common INTJ thing.
    Arrogant. Confused with confidence.
    Snobbish about some things.
    I don't like a lot of spontaneous things. I don't care for surprises either, so don't do it. Save that for people who enjoy it.
    High standards.
    I can be confrontational.
    Mean. This is often confused with honesty and directness. If you don't want either of those, please don't ask me questions. I would be lying if I cushioned the blow that much so do you want honest or do you want kinder and more gentle?
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  3. #73
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    -I can be very self-righteous and able to give people better advice than I then apply for myself.
    -I can be a bit of a downer if I'm feeling grim.
    -I will cut you out of my life and dislike you pretty much permanently if I feel you've messed me around.
    -I'm the person who always says "yeah, but what about this? it could go wrong!!" when you're excited about something. (Then again, I'm often right )
    -I have a hard time being spontaneous and will probably seem uncomfortable and irritable if put on the spot.
    -Over-analytical, a bit long-winded and a bit neurotic.


    The one that's been thrown at me as a really unpleasant thing is the self-righteous bit, and probably with some justification.

    I'm happy to say that people aren't usually highly critical of me otherwise and I don't think they're usually talking about me behind my back, as a lot of my friends know a lot of my other friends and these things usually come round at some point... I do get weird looks and slight nervousness/incomprehension about the neuroticism and over-analysis sometimes, but I don't think I'm hated for those!
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    I DOORSLAMMING

  4. #74
    Member Ethanescence's Avatar
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    Don't come into my room when I'm thinking or daydreaming or writing, unless it's important. I don't mind if you interrupt or talk to me any other time, just respect my space when I'm in it. And don't expect long answers to your boring questions. And expect to be yelled out if you don't leave.

    "So... (long pause where they stand at the door, forgetting why they opened it in first place) um... what hours are you working next week?"
    "Saturday, and a few weekdays, I think. I can't remember. I'll check again later."
    "What times?"
    "I said I don't know."
    "Can you find out for me now?"
    "WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW? DEAR GOD, WHY?! GET OUT!"

    It's probably one of the few times I noticeably lose my temper.

    Apparently this makes me "antisocial". I have no idea where they got that idea.

  5. #75
    Superwoman Red Herring's Avatar
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    - socially passive and oblivious or clumsy
    - pedantic ("well, actually...")
    - chaotic
    - tends to automatically be serious when everybody else is silly and silly when everybody else is serious
    - a bit of a snob
    - conflict avoidance leads to passive-aggressive behavior when pissed off
    The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge. Neither love without knowledge, nor knowledge without love can produce a good life. - Bertrand Russell
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  6. #76
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    As in the opposite "What makes you likeable" thread, I'm going to force myself to list 10 things.

    1. I can be too absorbed in my own thoughts and feelings to be aware of what's going on around me.
    2. I put myself down too much. People don't always like downers.
    3. I can be overly technical in my explanations of things.
    4. I'm not very self revealing, especially with people I don't know very well.
    5. I'm not all that physically affectionate.
    6. I can go on and on about the same thing.
    7. I can be unforgiving when wronged
    8. I may not be the best listener when something more pressing grabs my attention
    9. I may not be the most 'fun' person around.
    10. I'm not good at initiating contact on a more emotional/personal level.
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  7. #77
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mane View Post
    meh, i'm not even going to try and go against the main theme i'm noticing here: i am so awesome that people feel threatened by it and resent me for taking out more then my fair share out of the universal pool of awesome.

    ...also, sometimes i'll point out stuff like that.
    This is my main answer. I'm not hostile, and I don't 'call out' a lot of things, but I will on occasion note what I perceive to be unwarranted pride. Self-confidence is a great asset, as is finding a worthwhile place in the world and turning weaknesses into strengths. It's also worth understanding that what others don't like about us (and vice versa) isn't a universal judgment and that it is more of a reflection of the interaction between both parties. This is not the same thing as self-delusion and using excessive self-love as a defense mechanism. (Incidentally, I wonder how several people with conflicting viewpoints can all claim to "tell it like it is, objectively"--at least one of them must be 'wrong.') I recognize full well that this is one of my 'buttons,' and I'm learning to accept and even embrace this trait in other people.


    Back in grade school and high school, I was never particularly popular; my interests weren't aligned with my peers', and I was the shortest kid in the class (I'm above average height now, surprisingly). So, those things made me unlikeable. Nowadays, though I don't necessarily look for social approval, I'm simply not a polarizing figure who many people dislike.

    Other than the above.. if anything makes me unlikeable now, it's a dysthymic sort of depression and an inconsistent mood brought about by chemical imbalances; which is, of course, a thing that I've been attempting to correct for several years and that affects absolutely everything else. While I never turn these moods toward the outside (in the form of anger or otherwise), I'm sure that they cause some confusion for other people, especially acquaintances.

    In addition, some people would like it if I were more direct, firm, or assured in my stances, and some have claimed that I try to 'sound smart.' I must say that some don't like that I live a lifestyle that differs from theirs, especially the more traditional ones. Also, some don't like that I try to frame and discuss 'unframeable,' 'untouchable' ethical problems. Some of the criticisms levied against me are more valid than others.

    There's also some criticisms that I suspect in others but that I haven't explicitly heard. I'm sure that some would call me sanctimonious, for example.

    The traits that make me agreeable or unlikeable to others are not necessarily the same traits that, respectively, I like or don't like in myself; in general, the feedback from the outside is much more positive than the feedback from the inside. That is, if the question were "What don't you like about yourself?" (or "What do you like about yourself?") I would give you a different set of answers than I did in this and the sister thread.

  8. #78
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DisneyFanGirl View Post
    I also really REALLY hate off key singing. So if you can't sing on key, I'm pretty likely to tell you to stop. I'm working on not being so harsh.
    I hate off key singing too but it's very difficult for me to ask someone to stop. Besides not wanting to offend someone, I know that singing is very cathartic, even therapeutic for some people. It's how alot of people express joy and unwind. If that makes them happy, who I am I to deny them that pleasure? This is speaking from someone who liked to sing as a child and repeatedly got told be parents to stop singing off key. So eventually I stopped singing in front of people altogether.
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  9. #79
    lab rat extraordinaire CrystalViolet's Avatar
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    A little bit Whiney. Can give people whip lash with my mood swings. A bit sensitive. Argumentative for the sake of it. Stand offish and detached. People find me a little weird, and off putting. Withdrawn. Quiet but Outspoken, puts people off kilter.
    Mostly it's the unpredictable moods, and semi-permanent state of seeming depression.
    Currently submerged under an avalanche of books and paper work. I may come back up for air from time to time.
    Real life awaits and she is a demanding mistress.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  10. #80
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    - once stirred I have one hell of a temper
    - I can be distant
    - can be cold
    - can be self centered
    - have a hard time letting others get close to me
    - I can be lazy in stupid ways
    - I have stupid high standards and tend to cast aside people who don't make the cut

    I'm sure this is just the tip of the iceberg, but it's all I can come up with right now.

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