Here's some brutal honesty for you.
I went out last night to talk this bar tender I kind of liked.
And who I thought liked me. I asked for her number and got shot down. She said she was too busy to do anything, which in girl means "not interested".
I was gracious in defeat, and didn't get all pissed off or anything, and apologized for being so forward. But I did drink a good bit more than I usually do, and was kind of bummed out.
The messed up thing was I had been coming into this bar for a while, and would always chat up the bartender. I thought I had been smooth and tried to slow play it. She would twist her hair around her finger when I would talk to her, and she would always light up like a Christmas tree when I would walk in. I really thought she was interested, and thought I was being pretty cool by not just throwing myself at her the instant I got any positive feedback.
This game shit sucks. I wish I were better at picking up on signals. It's exhausting to think you've got a grasp on the situation for months only to later realize you were an idiot the entire time.
Luckily, a good friend of mine (an old fraternity brother) saw me at the bar and we hung out. He just finished his masters in business and was back in town for a while.
I'm also pretty good friends with the hostess, and she could tell how bummed I was so she pulled me off my bar stool and got me to go dance.
Even though I got disappointed, I still managed to have a pretty good time (and a monster hangover this morning).