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  1. #791
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    I wonder if I've let myself go.

  2. #792
    Anew Leaf
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    Well, how did you want me to respond to your snark?



    Bolded: Wait, aren't these kind of contradictory? Or am I misunderstanding it?

    I understand what you mean overall, bologna. I'm a bit of a neurotic when it comes to people genuinely liking me or not, I'll admit. Possibly because I've kind of... lost something when I began college. Feeling like I lost what made me likeable.

    You're an insighful man.



    Yes indeedy. I knew what I was getting into.
    The point is that you apologize excessively and often exceedingly. Often, I don't even understand WHY you are apologizing to me. There was one incident where I recognized that I went too far with you and I apologized to you. And instead of just accepting my apology or ignoring me, both are viable options, you instead apologized TO ME. It's just so wtf and overboard.

    You are a very kind person on the boards and go out of your way to say nice things to many people. I think that you just need a bit of a backbone at times and maybe some self esteem so that you don't have to base friendships off of you apologizing all of the time. It's ok for you to get upset with people at times if they bother you.

    I've also seen some threads where you start posting your opinion on things and then someone disagrees with you and you back down and apologize and mumble. It is ok to take a stand on topics, and you, of all posters, would probably be quite polite in disagreeing so it's ok.

    And more directly at the bold. You called me passive aggressive in this thread, and I see you as being quite passive aggressive, like with this comment. If I seem passive aggressive to you it's because I feel I can never just state an opinion to you without you being hurt or apologizing fifty times, so I try and go the indirect route. Calling my Ne posts as "cornball", I take offense to that honestly. If you choose to see me as some silly pointless person who derails threads, then you don't know me at all and you just see what you want to see.

    The End.

  3. #793
    Senior Member Santosha's Avatar
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    Do you doubt my ENFP-ness or 6w7-ness?

    If so, Why?

    If I see this thread as being a narcissists wet dream, would that be: a) and objective perception b) a narcissist projection c) a subconscious desire for wet dreams or d) none of the above

    Have you ever seen an ENFP's Fi/Te converge to look like Ti/Fe?

    Am I the only forum member here that is convinced a certain ENTJ is really Fe dom?
    Does this perception (Of ENTJ looking Fe) occur often?
    Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun - Watts

  4. #794
    libtard SJW chickpea's Avatar
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    am i taken seriously at all?

  5. #795
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saturned View Post
    The point is that you apologize excessively and often exceedingly. Often, I don't even understand WHY you are apologizing to me. There was one incident where I recognized that I went too far with you and I apologized to you. And instead of just accepting my apology or ignoring me, both are viable options, you instead apologized TO ME. It's just so wtf and overboard.
    If you're talking about the blog name thing, I apologized because I kind of lashed out in an accusatory way. Doesn't mean I didn't think you were wrong, but I could've dealt with it better.

    You are a very kind person on the boards and go out of your way to say nice things to many people. I think that you just need a bit of a backbone at times and maybe some self esteem so that you don't have to base friendships off of you apologizing all of the time. It's ok for you to get upset with people at times if they bother you.
    Heh, I guess I'm afraid of the backlash... Silly, right? ^_^;

    I've also seen some threads where you start posting your opinion on things and then someone disagrees with you and you back down and apologize and mumble. It is ok to take a stand on topics, and you, of all posters, would probably be quite polite in disagreeing so it's ok.
    That one's got a lot to do with my difficulty in logically defending my position... I never quite have all bases covered, so I kowtow before someone can stab at the chink in the armor. Also very silly.

    And more directly at the bold. You called me passive aggressive in this thread, and I see you as being quite passive aggressive, like with this comment. If I seem passive aggressive to you it's because I feel I can never just state an opinion to you without you being hurt or apologizing fifty times, so I try and go the indirect route.
    Oh, I didn't mean to me, I meant in general. (You're quite direct with me, if also impish. ) But maybe I was projecting, which is always a likely possibility; as such, I apologize.

    Calling my Ne posts as "cornball", I take offense to that honestly. If you choose to see me as some silly pointless person who derails threads, then you don't know me at all and you just see what you want to see.

    The End.
    Ah, I think I went for the wrong word. I meant more along the lines of "screwball", like something off-the-wall and unapologetically whimsical... And yes, I do take you seriously, you no longer derail threads like a boss; it's more like you encourage some pretty bizarre tangents.

    Peace + love, bunny buddy?
    Tentative typing: ISFJ 6w5 or 9w1 (Sp/S[?]).

  6. #796
    Anew Leaf
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    @Viridian

    If you're talking about the blog name thing, I apologized because I kind of lashed out in an accusatory way. Doesn't mean I didn't think you were wrong, but I could've dealt with it better.
    Doesn't mean you have to apologize to me about it. The two options are quite cut and dry: either accept my apology and we move on, or don't and we move on. Saying 'I think you are wrong' and 'I am sorry for my actions' does not solve the situation. A - you aren't accepting my apology, B - you are creating a situation where I am even more in the wrong. Just say something like "Thank you for apologizing, I appreciate it. I am sorry that I came off so strong, but I was startled." And........ we're done. Instead it's this long, drawn out process.

    And other times I have had you apologize to me like 5-10 times over some comment you made... and I literally have no idea why you are apologizing because the comment was no problem at all. It makes me uncomfortable.

    Heh, I guess I'm afraid of the backlash... Silly, right? ^_^;
    I understand why, but I really don't think you have much, if anything, to fear over backlash. You are kind to others all over the board. You have a right to your own opinion! So state it! Maybe you will have a perspective that no one else has thought of before. Won't know unless you put your thoughts out there a little bit. I can understand having a fear of conflict, I am personally not a fan myself. However, it is a part of life, and here is as good a place as any to start practicing a little bit. It will probably help give you a sense of confidence in your abilities. People won't dislike you because you have X opinion on a topic, even if they personally believe Y.

    That one's got a lot to do with my difficulty in logically defending my position... I never quite have all bases covered, so I kowtow before someone can stab at the chink in the armor. Also very silly.
    Oh, I can understand this one as well. Don't let the super logicals intimidate you into not stating an opinion on a topic. Just have some fun with it. It isn't wrong to have an opinion on something because it feels right. Just because you can't build a rock solid theorem revolving around a topic, doesn't mean you are wrong.

    Oh, I didn't mean to me, I meant in general. (You're quite direct with me, if also impish. ) But maybe I was projecting, which is always a likely possibility; as such, I apologize.
    Yeah, rewording it like this doesn't make it better.

    Ah, I think I went for the wrong word. I meant more along the lines of "screwball", like something off-the-wall and unapologetically whimsical... And yes, I do take you seriously, you no longer derail threads like a boss; it's more like you encourage some pretty bizarre tangents.
    Ok.

    Peace + love, bunny buddy?
    Yes, it's just fine.

    Just be yourself more on the boards and stop hiding from that self. Get feisty!

  7. #797
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    ^ I agree with @Saturned on this. @Viridian, I think the forum would benefit if you didn't walk on eggshells as much. I know you have lots to contribute, but it seems like almost everything you post comes with a cushion -- with the dual purpose of protecting the other person against possible offense, and protecting yourself against potential backlash. Even with inoffensive topics, I've seen this. Maybe this is part of the social awkwardness that you've said you have trouble with irl? Is it because you have a hard time reading people, and figuring out what would be offensive, so you just apologize for everything instead?

    And the way I think of the issue of not having a fully formed opinion yet, in those situations, is that honestly, you have all the time in the world to form an opinion and post it. You could ask someone questions about the topic. You could even do that in the thread where the issue is being debated! That sort of behavior is not looked down upon, unless the debate is competitive, because most discussions like that are for the purpose of gaining new information and ideas. If you do that, you'll be seen as "above" the petty competitiveness, and you'll be respected for it.
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  8. #798
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    I guess we can be "brutally honest" about ourselves, too.

    It takes a lot for me to not like someone--really, I have to not like them on multiple channels: their communication style, their ideas, their personality, and so on. But when I don't like someone, I actively and consciously create distance between us. I don't know whether that's the "right thing" to do or not, but I figure it's okay to distance myself between me and the people that I don't want to associate with.

    Screw "the truth"; I have better ways to seek it out than to discuss it with other people who aren't worth my time.

    That's my standpoint. It may or may not grate some people

    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    Bolded: Wait, aren't these kind of contradictory? Or am I misunderstanding it?


    My thought is this: They're contradictory when you're too assertive of a person--when you're a total asshole who doesn't give a crap about other people at all. They're not contradictory when you're typically on the other end of the scale (like us) and you tend to need to assert yourself more (though in a diplomatic way).

    My own lack of self-worth and seeking of approval came from bouts of clinical depression. Therapy and right medication has definitely helped.


  9. #799
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    Quote Originally Posted by Huxley3112 View Post
    Do you doubt my ENFP-ness or 6w7-ness?
    I didn't before, but now I doubt both.

    If so, Why?
    Because deception knows no bounds with you, Huxley.

    You lied about being 4w3 for so long, that I have no idea what to believe from you anymore. It makes me think, my god, if she's capable of lying about her enneagram type, then what other monstrous things is she capable of? Has this all been just an act? Who is the real Huxley? All those nights passing yourself off as a 4w3, was it all just some big charade?

    If I see this thread as being a narcissists wet dream, would that be: a) and objective perception b) a narcissist projection c) a subconscious desire for wet dreams or d) none of the above
    Slightly more B than C.

    Have you ever seen an ENFP's Fi/Te converge to look like Ti/Fe?
    Once, but I was on shroomz.

    Am I the only forum member here that is convinced a certain ENTJ is really Fe dom?
    If we're talking about Lark, then I don't think you're alone.

  10. #800
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    I did! But we posted them at around the same time. Just like on the other thread.

    I'm just sayin'.
    This is getting entertaining.

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