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  1. #81
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    Smile A Sparkle and a Curl

    My girlfriend says I am an animal.

    I try my best ever since I heard her speak at a feminist gathering. She said what a woman wants is a mink in the wardrobe, a tiger in the bed and a donkey to pay for it all.

    I don't fancey being a mink or a donkey so I have gone for the tiger. But afterwards she looks at me, and half with disgust and half with admiration, she says, what an animal you are - with a sparkle in her eye and a curl of her lip.

  2. #82
    Ginkgo
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    My girlfriend says I am an animal.

    I try my best ever since I heard her speak at a feminist gathering. She said what a woman wants is a mink in the wardrobe, a tiger in the bed and a donkey to pay for it all.

    I don't fancey being a mink or a donkey so I have gone for the tiger. But afterwards she looks at me, and half with disgust and half with admiration, she says, what an animal you are - with a sparkle in her eye and a curl of her lip.
    I think you're a mytho-poetic narwhal.

    Do you fancy narwhals?

  3. #83
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    I want to be the apex predator so I'll be a fat chef with a gun.

  4. #84
    likes this gromit's Avatar
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    Sloth. Sloths are so cute and awesome!!!





    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

  5. #85
    Insert Snarky Quip Here Stigmata's Avatar
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    I'd be a circus elephant with post traumatic stress disorder after watching all the elder members of the herd, including my mother, slain right in front of my very tusks.

    The emotional distress from this event would lay mostly dormant for the majority of my adult elephant life. The humans would think of me as gentle and tame, until one day the flashing red lights the circus lights coupled with the children waiving red and blue flashlights in the audience would overwhelm my retinas, thus inducing those same mental images of my herd's dripping elephant blood, which would destroy the last barrier of mentally stability I was clinging to. I would then proceed to run a muck into the audience and trample a group of mischievous 6 year olds to death at one's birthday circus party.

    The tragedy would later bring forth questions of "Why did he do it?" or "He was always such a nice elephant", but it would be too late as the damage had already been done, and the humans would've paid the ultimate price for their misjudgment. I would later meet the same fate as my ancestors.

  6. #86
    philosopher wood nymph greenfairy's Avatar
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    I have several power animals, but to be I'd have to choose cat.

  7. #87
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    If I were an animal, I would choose to be homo sapiens.

  8. #88
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    Jack Russell Terrier



    Higher classification: Dog

    Temperament: Stubborn, Intelligent, Athletic, Energetic, Fearless, Vocal, Loyal

    The Jack Russell Terrier has been bred to be very intelligent. The nature of the work that Jack Russell's are meant for is unpredictable at best. There is rarely a consistent hunting experience unless a hunter chooses to hunt the same spot every time of a regular basis. This is rare. Even if the same location is used consistently, there are often obstacles that haven't been encountered on previous hunts. The most valuable Jack Russell's are the ones who can meet challenges and do complex problem solving on the spot in order to gain the advantage. Much of the prey hunted by the Jack Russell, such as the fox and the raccoon are equally as intelligent and it takes a clever dog in order outsmart the sly and elusive game it is hunting. The Jack Russell quite routinely was placed at the front of the pack and was meant to run far ahead of the other hounds and hunters.

    Many dog lovers have gravitated towards the breed for its friendly, curious personality and diminutive size. Above all they prize this dog for being fearless, intelligent and alert. A dog that is truly ready to face the world head-on without a second thought.

    Jack Russell's are very playful and have very flamboyant personalities. Jack Russell's have been known to play for hours, until they collapse from exhaustion. Allowing them a chance to exercise these traits will help keep your Jack happy and healthy. Jack's that are not properly attended to will often exhibit excessive and unwarranted barking, an unstoppable urge to escape from your home or property, unwanted digging and damage outside and inside the home as well as damage to personal belongings within the home that are within reach. The key is to keep them active. The Jack is also unique as it has one of the most well defined senses of personal boundaries of any dog breed, which is often unexpected because of its size.

    The Jack Russell is also unwaveringly loyal. The mighty little wonder will go to any lengths to protect its home and family. A jack will not hesitate to protect owners and children in its family. Some Jacks have even been known to protect other pets in the family from harm. If a Jack perceives a member of the family to be in danger they will even often protect them by placing their own body between whomever they are protecting and the perceived danger. This loyalty makes the Jack Russell one of the bravest little dog breeds in the world, and many a Jack has been injured or even killed while protecting loved ones from harm.

    Thanks to its energy level this mighty little bundle of fur requires a huge investment of time and attention. A Jack who hasn't been allowed to run outside recently will often mope and appear to have "the blues". At times a frustrated Jack can even exhibit a preference for independence, even rebellion. It's all a part of a rich, exhausting tapestry. With these things in mind, it's easy to see why the proper environment is important to maintain the famous traits of the Jack Russell temperament. Owners of Jack Russell's also have to exhibit a certain amount of acceptance of their Jack Russell and the history behind the breed that makes him who he is. Your Jack Russell is who he is, and you will not change him.

    They need to run. They need to hunt. They need to play. And in down times, they need to be shown intimate affection. When enjoying downtime Jack Russell's love to snuggle. They enjoy nothing more than making you keep them warm in your own bed, and taking up as much space as possible while doing it. If a Jack Russell is in the mood for petting and isn't getting, it will let you know by forcefully ramming its head under your hand and making it run along his head. It's best to take the hint and give him some affection.

    The main point of focus that any researcher should take away with them is that although the descriptions of the Jack Russell personality may seem to contradict each other, in fact is signifies the duality in the breeds personality that is necessary for it to function as both a loyal companion and a fearless hunter.

    Good Jack Russell owners usually find it fairly easy to accept their Jack Russell's personalities because in the end, even with all of his quirks, there is a bond of unconditional love between the dog and its owner.

  9. #89
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    An elegant Camel...I can relate to her endurance, in being able to survive with no food or water for days....

  10. #90
    Senior Member kyli_ryan's Avatar
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    I'm going to be repetitive...

    baby-elephant_lznp-0645.jpg

    I'd choose elephant... but I'd have to be a baby one

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