Im fairly unhappy, but not really depressed, ive only been getting better over the last year, so thats something to be glad about, I'm just intensely lonely and isolated the way things are right now, so it makes things a bit more difficult, it will unfortunately be a very long time until I will be able to break my isolation in any significant manner... in the mean time the majority of my contact with the outside world is here, facebook, and a few other forums,lol...
At this particular moment, I can say that I am happy. There is nothing in my life that would cause me to feel terribly unhappy, of course there are areas I would like to improve, but there will always be something to improve anyway. That's why I can't really say that I'm ecstatically happy and I think it would be unrealistic to expect to ever feel like that. I feel good about myself, about the people in my life, the way things are in my life at the moment. I feel good, that's it. Feeling like this is kind of strange because a year-1,5 years ago I felt so lost and broken, so I'm fully aware that it's not a good idea to rely on anything lasting forever. Everything passes. You better enjoy what positives you have while you have them.
I was going to start a similar thread where people talk about their needs. It's the same principle; people should have places to just describe their needs, whether they are met or not, and the intensity of suffering.
I read a book about "The Suicidal Mind", and in it they divide needs into 20 areas. He researched 1000's of suicides. It's not which of the 20 areas people fall into, but the INTENSITY that they have feelings about it. I looked for the book, and I didn't find it this morning, but it's a good study.
I can say that I have numerous complex feelings. I have observation points where I can observe emotions like watching the weather. Thus it would be more accurate to say, "It is looking gloomy today!", or "BAJ is sure morose! Wow!"
If I can dive down and identify with the emotional state, then it is like making soup. I can mix in mystical or mythos. For another metaphor, I can "tend my garden" so that certain attitudes are nourished and therefore choose to feel certain ways. I can watch the emotional state occur, and choose (somewhat) not to identify with it.
That said, emotions can attack me. Heck, I've been caught in a rainstorm or two. Happens all the time.
If you seek the rose, there will be thorns. Watch out!