I was quite a loner though. I didn't really talk about anything with my parents, and also from junior high on I also ceased really talking / being open with my peers, and ceased knowing how to relate to them. I wanted friends, but didn't know how to make them, and also didn't trust most of the people, because having become extremely observant rather than interacting, I saw all of the gossip and shifting allegiances, and I heard all of the talk, and couldn't identify with any of it. A lot too was self-perpetuating; I closed myself off, and thus blockaded others from getting in, or for even seeing me as anything but 'the quiet girl' who they were afraid to talk to, simply *because* I was so quiet. I'd say I had one real friend in high school. Everyone else I only said 'Hi' to and exchanged pleasantries,but nothing more.
I was also quite embarrassed about all of this and who I was and what I was interested in, as I knew it didn't fit in anywhere. I mean, I was out birdwatching in 6th/7th grade. So very uncool. So I really had no one who shared any of my interests, nor who I trusted to be around, because in late elementary through junior high my former friends all left me because I had become uncool. I was also the kid who spent oodles of time on science projects / presentations because I really really liked the subject matter and was interested in it and wanted to do a good job and also liked any chance to extend myself creatively.. They were often fun for me.
In any event - I wasn't happy, really, from age 10 on - I wasn't happy in terms of how I interacted with people and where I fit in. My only solace/ happiness was in activities (ballet, music, nature, reading), which were all solitary in the end, even though with dance/music, I was obviously interacting superficially with people. It was just that deeper level that was 100% non-existant. I was pretty much alone and got used to that. Used to doing everything on my own and not sharing anything with anyone.