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  1. #31
    Senior Member Stigmata's Avatar
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    I don't expect people to reply to me at all, or even acknowledge my existence considering most of the time I post things that even I find to be extremely cringe worthy. On one hand, it's despicable, yet on the other hand, I like knowing that my posts are like that one overly cooked hot dog at a picnic, in that, everyone can obviously see it there, but no one ever chooses to formally acknowledge how utterly grotesque it looks in an effort not to hurt the feelings of the cook, so look, shudder internally while lightly gagging, and continue on thinking "As long as I don't look at it directly, maybe it will just....go away", but it never does. It just sits there for eternity decomposing while also slowly being picked away by flies and pelicans. I'm kind of torn on reps. On one hand, they can provide a small dose of validation, but yet on the other hand I feel like the other person is condescending rubbing their fingers through my hair and over enthusiastically congratulating me for what I'd consider to be mediocrity while saying "Ya did good, sport" with a big thumbs up, a sly wink, and pinning a giant golden star on my shirt.

  2. #32
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Are you saying we should be using sticky stars instead of pinned ones?

    (We can do that. It's cheaper.)
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  3. #33
    Senior Member Stigmata's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Are you saying we should be using sticky stars instead of pinned ones?

    (We can do that. It's cheaper.)
    It's really a toss-up. Obviously sticky stars are safer, but pinned ones provide that added element of risk of potentially being fondled by whoever is pinning it on your shirt. I like security as much as the next guy, but deep down I like knowing that somewhere out there congratulating a student for winning the spelling bee by pinning a star on their shirt could be escalated into a case of sexual misconduct with a minor. Sometimes you gotta live life on the edge a little.

  4. #34
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stigmata View Post
    It's really a toss-up. Obviously sticky stars are safer, but pinned ones provide that added element of risk of potentially being fondled by whoever is pinning it on your shirt. I like security as much as the next guy, but deep down I like knowing that somewhere out there congratulating a student for winning the spelling bee by pinning a star on their shirt could be escalated into a case of sexual misconduct with a minor. Sometimes you gotta live life on the edge a little.
    It's the potential to draw blood, not the sexual overtones, that stimulate me... but I guess you do have a point.

    PS. Were you ever in a spelling bee? Spelling bee etiquette is complex and volatile. I am still scarred from my sixth-grade bee, where the last five finalists were so good that they had to throw out the list and give us words we did not study. I screwed up "fantasize" out of all things, probably the least-compelled speller was the only one to get her word right because she drew an easy word, and my pain still continues 30+ years later. Alas.

    Quote Originally Posted by giggly
    Is it considered rude to not respond to someone's post in a thread?
    On occasion, it is acceptable to not respond (especially if they are talking about weiner dogs or exotic cheeses made from the milk of chocolate-colored hamsters), but one should not make a habit of it. I think most people, if no one responds to their contributions for a period of time, will become disenchanted with the forum and potentially capable of anything... including leaving and posting nothing else.

    What about a response (not a question) in your blog or thread you made?
    I always acknowledge it, even if very brief (because I have nothing to say in return). I feel they were kind enough to post in my thread, so I want to recognize that and encourage them to post more.

    (I'd feel different if they had peed in my pool and would not respond in an appreciative way at all, but as for internet threads, I'd reciprocate somehow.)

    What about reps?
    Reps are the most ignorable of all these, but again, if I want to encourage people to leave me reps, I feel I should acknowledge the rep on the Wall or with another rep. If people stop leaving me reps that I appreciated because I ignored all the other ones, I only have myself to blame.

    It's just me, though. I enjoy the communication.
    (All right. I crave it because I'm lonely. So there, I admitted it. Rep me!)


    (ps. no, i'm not tipsy tonight. I'm just in a weird mood.)
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  5. #35
    Senior Member burymecloser's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    PS. Were you ever in a spelling bee? Spelling bee etiquette is complex and volatile. I am still scarred from my sixth-grade bee, where the last five finalists were so good that they had to throw out the list and give us words we did not study. I screwed up "fantasize" out of all things, probably the least-compelled speller was the only one to get her word right because she drew an easy word, and my pain still continues 30+ years later. Alas.
    I think it's a violation of forum etiquette to bring up painful memories. :steam: I remember...


    I was 10. There were only three of us left. The judge spoke a word.

    "Links. L-I-N-K-S. Links."

    A sad look. "I'm sorry, that's wrong. The correct spelling is L-Y-N-X."



    I lost because I didn't ask for the word to be used in a sentence. How heartless do you have to be to let a 10-year-old lose on a fucking homophone? Give me the definition and a chance. I knew how to spell "lynx".

    I wonder how many other kids have been scarred by "complex and volatile" spelling bee etiquette. How did you spell "fantasize"?




    Oops. I seldom reply unless it seems like a response is called for. Don't take it personally.

    I think this is the most smilies I've ever used in a single post.

  6. #36
    Senior Member Stigmata's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    PS. Were you ever in a spelling bee? Spelling bee etiquette is complex and volatile. I am still scarred from my sixth-grade bee, where the last five finalists were so good that they had to throw out the list and give us words we did not study. I screwed up "fantasize" out of all things, probably the least-compelled speller was the only one to get her word right because she drew an easy word, and my pain still continues 30+ years later. Alas.
    I was........Once *turns head and begins staring deeply into the sunset while introspecting*, but that was a long time ago.

  7. #37
    Senior Member Synapse's Avatar
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    I sometimes wonder where the line is between not enough and too much response. I sometimes respond, sometimes I try to respond to everyone when I feel in the moment other times I am going through something and can't respond to anything even when I want to. Then after a time I wonder whether its okay to respond when delayed or leave as is and in general drift even though my intuition says its a welcome to reply, rep or comment back for when something resonates and acknowledge the moment. There is this internal struggle going on, just say whats on your mind, then when it passes its like doubt.

  8. #38

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    This is the internet, one of its benefits is not being held to the same social obligations we are held to during face to face contact.
    I respond if I have something to say or feel like perpetuating the conversation.
    I try not to do this in real life as frequently.
    "... generalities are intellectually necessary evils. Not philosophers, but fret-sawyers and stamp collectors compose the backbone of society."

  9. #39
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    I always reply to personal messages sent to me. There's a couple reasons for that. One is that they are more personal in nature and the person took the time to compose it, so I feel its only right to reply.

    Visitor messages and reps I'll sometimes but not always reply to. Alot depends on the context and how lazy I am.

    Summary of response rates:

    Private messages > Visitor messages > reps
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  10. #40
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by burymecloser View Post
    I remember...

    I was 10. There were only three of us left. The judge spoke a word.

    "Links. L-I-N-K-S. Links."

    A sad look. "I'm sorry, that's wrong. The correct spelling is L-Y-N-X."



    I lost because I didn't ask for the word to be used in a sentence. How heartless do you have to be to let a 10-year-old lose on a fucking homophone? Give me the definition and a chance. I knew how to spell "lynx".

    I wonder how many other kids have been scarred by "complex and volatile" spelling bee etiquette. How did you spell "fantasize"?
    A homophone? In a spelling bee? Not used in a sentence? How lame.
    You were robbed.

    I spelled it: "fantacize."

    Afterward, I felt stupid. I had panicked. Obviously "fantasy" is spelled with an "s" so my logical guess should have been with the "s". But it just didn't seem right at the time, in my state of panic. I started bawling after everyone left the auditorium, and went on for 5-10 minutes; my best friend at the time stayed with me until I got a grip. I never joined another spelling bee.


    It looks like a number of us need to pool together and create a support group for Elementary-School Spelling Bee Victims. The pain and shame is real, the h-o-r-r-o-r lingers forever!

    Quote Originally Posted by coriolis
    I only discovered what reps are and where to find mine a month or so ago, and by then there were a handful accumulated. So, if you sent me one and I didn't reply, nothing personal, just my being dumb about the forum. There are many more features here than on my past forums, and I am still learning my way around.
    Yeah, reps are weird that way. Some other people have discovered them later as well. They're kind of tucked away.

    Quote Originally Posted by strawberries
    hullo i'd appreciate it if everyone left me at least one rep or wall message per day. please search my archive on the days when i don't post. whether i reply is entirely at my discretion. thank you kindly.
    Whereupon Strawberries gets a rep that says "hi" from fifty forum members every day for the next eight months, until she finally has a nervous breakdown and has to leave... whereupon all the reps change to "bye."
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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