Just like I like feeling up Victor, in the way he likes to be touched, I have also noticed you, SuchIrony :P
Well, myabe not in the same way, since that would indicate polygamy. In a way. ^^
But I notice you as much as I notice a lot of the more long-time members, and it seems (to me at least) that you get normal attention for someone with about 1.5 k posts.
Mightier than the tread of marching armies is the power of an idea whose time has come
Actually, I DO notice your posts, SuchIrony. The main reason I don't usually say anything, is because you don't make it clear that you want any attention. You seem to give the impression that you'd rather be left alone. Now that I know, I may very well have something to say.
Thanks for the feedback. Maybe its the way I was raised or maybe its just me, but its very hard for me to come out and say that I want attention. For some reason, I feel like if people were really interested in me, they would pay attention without my ever having to ask for it.
I have mixed feelings about attention. It bothers me when I feel like I'm not being noticed but I don't like too much attention either. I've never been much of a self-promoting type- preferring to let my talents speak for themselves and waiting for someone to compliment me on that. Maybe I do need to put myself out there more.
One reason why I was so hesitant to post this thread is because I worry that the new attention I receive is because people feel sorry for me not so much because I'm genuinely an interesting and likeable person. It feels manipulative somehow to post about being overlooked- as if I'm fishing for compliments. That's another reason why I agonized over posting this thread for two weeks.
Originally Posted by Athenian200
The thing is, a lot of us were here early on. We had a chance to get in on the ground floor, so to speak. By the time you joined, everything was already established, and there wasn't a lot left for you to point out or add. If you had joined earlier, it's quite possible that you would be just as well known as everyone else.
I never thought of that but that is a good point. I've only been on this forum for 7 months now. Maybe my expectations are too high.
Originally Posted by Athenian200
If you want to draw attention, timing is key. If you say something similar to someone else who has already posted, it will generally be ignored unless you differentiate yourself. You might actually be at a disadvantage, because there are so many INTPs here, and this forum was spawned from a forum full of INTPs, so the INTP perspective is already well-known and represented here.
But I think that if you stay long enough, and make an effort to reach out to people... you'll find that we start to include you more often. This thread could be a good first step for you, actually.
I can relate to your feelings, however, because I tend to have the same experience in real life. But I'm usually pretty good at getting attention on the Internet.
I'm going to try to pass for an ESFJ. That'll catch peoples' interest.
I try to avoid too many of the "me too" types of posts. I try to post threads that haven't been previously posted in the past and are different from the current topics of discussion.
I may be just another INTP but I also feel different enough from most of the INTPs. I'm not so sure other INTPs would care so much about the possibilty of being overlooked. Sounds like more of an extravert and/or feeling thing. Maybe its a social subtype thing though- caring what the group at large thinks of you.
Originally Posted by Arclight
It's a rather fickle forum that way..
I notice your posts and find you point of view interesting and thought provoking.
I find you very polite and maybe a bit shy.
But I am certain no finds you insignificant, even if that doesn't make it feel any less real.
I for one, Hope you stick around and find a level of comfort here.
Friendship request sent
Thanks for your kind words. Friendship accepted.
I come across to most people in real life too as polite and a bit shy. Shyness is something I'm working on but that's for another thread.
Originally Posted by tawanda
Haha, you posted here, too.
I responded in your blog.
Thanks! I think I'll also copy this over in the NT forum, the fluff zone, the graveyard, the NF forum, the health forum, the sexuality forum, the relationships forum, well how about all of the forums? That would certainly be a way of attracting attention.
Originally Posted by ThatGirl
It's okay everyone feels that way their first week on the forum....
Eventually you will grow breasts!
P.S. Thats sort of how I do nice.....I'm leaving.
Seven months I've been here!!!
And I do wear a D-cup size bra and yes, they are real!
5w6 or 9w1 sp/so/sx, I think
SuchIrony, I think you need to stop worrying about the amount of attention you're getting or not getting, and just interact the way you want to interact. I do think you're expecting a bit too much too soon, because I remember when you were here for about a month and complained that none of the threads you started seemed to get attention and that you felt ignored. And I do empathize, but really, you can't expect to be as known as some of the folks who've been here forever, when you have been here a little over six months. It's not realistic. Very few people are able to establish a significant forum presence in that length of time, unless they have a very polarizing personality, or are a troll.
Also, some people are going to have quieter personalities than others. I've been here for a few years now, and people know me, but I will never be the life of the forum. I have a more subdued style, and I don't hang out in Vent, etc. I don't post a lot of controversial things or flirt a lot or hang out in heated threads that often. So just know that you can still have a great forum experience without being the head cheerleader, so to speak. I'm very beta here, and I'm totally fine with that.
Since you've posted about this stuff before, I would maybe examine why you feel that way, and take steps towards knowing you're okay without the validation. Then the validation will just be gravy.
I think you underestimate your impact. Something I've discovered from posting here is that just because people don't constantly say it, doesn't mean your contributions aren't valued. Part of what you're feeling can be a result of be an introvert around here, or at least someone that doesn't command attention with their posts. This isn't a bad thing, it just means you take more time getting to know. I'm the same and know what it feels like.
Besides, I totally recognise your name and have a (albeit vague) sense of your character, which is saying something because I virtually have Alzheimer's.
INFP 4w5 so/sp
I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.
- Emily Bronte