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  1. #1
    Senior Member ArbiterDewey's Avatar
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    Lightbulb S vs. N Conversation

    No, this thread isn't what you're probably thinking.

    I have noticed when listening to two of my friends (Metamorphosis/Hexis, both N types) that their conversational manner is on the same "wavelength" for lack of a better word. There is seemingly no time set to interpretation, they just know. It is as though they know exactly what the other person means, at all times. While myself, an S type, even in conversation with another S does not have this quality. It is as though I know exactly what I'm talking about, but I have to go far out of my way to get the other person to understand exactly what I'm saying or the point that I'm making. Two S types I find have the hardest time at this.

    An S type talking to an N type, as far as I've heard brings stress to the N type. They're so used to being immediately comprehended that having to go out of their way for an S to comprehend them is seemingly a waste of time (as I have seen. May not be the case for all.)

    What are your thoughts?

  2. #2
    Senior Member Hexis's Avatar
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    Well like you said us three have already discussed this and feel its true so im gona wait for other replys.
    SDMF

  3. #3
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Actually, I've heard that talking to N's is often stressful for S types as well... so it should work both ways. Concrete-Concrete and Abstract-Abstract should be simpler, theoretically, compared to Abstract-Concrete or Concrete-Abstract.

    In your specific case, I think it's the shared xxTJ with Meta, meaning you both show and communicate via Te. And you and Hexis have all the same functions in reverse... meaning you should experience all the same aspects of reality, but with opposite priorities.

    N's aren't necessarily used to being comprehended, actually. Society is mostly made up of S's who are unlikely to "get" them easily, and healthy ones usually try to learn coping skills to compensate. It may well be harder for them to explain themselves to an S, but if they really think it's a waste of time, then they're just being arrogant.

  4. #4
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    Sensors and Intuitives just don't seem to live on the same wavelength.. I have sensor friends and relatives that I absolutely love, but our relationship can never get any deeper, because some things just aren't understood or appreciated by [the] sensors [I know] and vice versa.

    I often get the blank stare or the change of topic. I've just learned to take a passive role in relation to the sensors in my life, because it's easier just to let them to set the pace.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    When I converse with sensors, I don't get stressed, I usually get bored. Conversations about relationships are the only ones that go anywhere between me and sensors (and even those lack depth). I just spent a week working with a bunch of sensors at a golf tournament and the conversation was soooo boring 99% of the time (talking about sports, cars, and how they'd like to sleep with some woman they just saw walk by). I'd just wander off and read a book or turn on my mp3 player during most of the downtime. A couple of them tried to engage me in more intellectual conversation and I tried to go with it, but everything I was saying was way over their heads, so I gave up.

    But hey, I was there to work, not socialize, and I made a LOT of money that week. So I'm not complaining.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  6. #6
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    I've never had any problem talking with Intuitive people! I find them interesting and I grew up with an INTP dad, so I'm used to the different communication style

    I hope that I'm not boring I try to learn as much as possible about the world in order not to bore anyone with conversation! Some of my INxx friends actually encourage me to tell them stories because they find my experiences interesting!

    I think that as long as the Sensor or Intuiter are aware of the differences that it's quite easy to converse across the type
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  7. #7
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    I think that as long as the Sensor or Intuiter are aware of the differences that it's quite easy to converse across the type
    This is true. Talking about our types together has improved my relationship with my ISFJ mom. It's given us something to talk about that I like and she likes..

  8. #8
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by athenian200 View Post
    In your specific case, I think it's the shared xxTJ with Meta, meaning you both show and communicate via Te. And you and Hexis have all the same functions in reverse... meaning you should experience all the same aspects of reality, but with opposite priorities.
    I think he is more so talking about me and Hexis talking to each other, not individually to AD, although there normally aren't problems in that respect either. He can correct me if I'm wrong, though.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  9. #9
    Free-Rangin' Librarian Jae Rae's Avatar
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    Darling Whatever, you could never be boring. [smile.]

    I agree with and relate completely to your post, with the exception of certain INFPs. When they talk to me, I feel as if they're leaving out half the words necessary to convey what they're trying to say.

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    Proud Female Rider in Maverick's Bike Club.

  10. #10
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArbiterDewey View Post
    No, this thread isn't what you're probably thinking.

    I have noticed when listening to two of my friends (Metamorphosis/Hexis, both N types) that their conversational manner is on the same "wavelength" for lack of a better word. There is seemingly no time set to interpretation, they just know. It is as though they know exactly what the other person means, at all times. While myself, an S type, even in conversation with another S does not have this quality. It is as though I know exactly what I'm talking about, but I have to go far out of my way to get the other person to understand exactly what I'm saying or the point that I'm making. Two S types I find have the hardest time at this.

    An S type talking to an N type, as far as I've heard brings stress to the N type. They're so used to being immediately comprehended that having to go out of their way for an S to comprehend them is seemingly a waste of time (as I have seen. May not be the case for all.)

    What are your thoughts?
    This is sort of how I recognize other N's. I know who I connect with by just expressing concepts, and who is not "getting it" and who I need to be more explicitly with. Some S's demand a lot of tangibility. And it's exhausting sometimes for me to deal with.

    S's, I think, need to have things more specific and clearly stated for them to really grasp everything. It is just how they work. So even when an S speaks, N's can still usually grasp the concepts and make the connection, but an S listener demands more specifics.

    Most S's, though, seem to think in specifics, so they don't seem to mind as much to have to be so specific. (maybe you are different here, I don't know.) I remember being irate with S's who tell me FAR more detail than I need, when I already understood their point five minutes ago.

    I don't know. I guess this is just a post of affirmation.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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