User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 11 to 20 of 42

  1. #11
    Phantonym
    Guest

    Default

    I do. Only then would I be able to pay the deserved attention to others around me. After that - SO, family and friends respectively or whoever needs the most attention if there's something really serious going on.

  2. #12
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    9w1
    Socionics
    INFj None
    Posts
    9,827

    Default

    Because I'm a parent, family kind of goes into two groups. My kids, of course, take priority over my family of origin and my immediate family and friends take priority over my extended family.

    Sometimes the balancing act between the needs of my SO and our kids is tricky. When the kids were very young, their needs came before everything else -- it is a matter of survival for the helpless little boogers.

    As they've gotten older, their needs are now basically equal with the needs of their father and I, being ranked by how critical the need is. Their wants are not above those of their father, though. He works his butt off and he was pretty well neglected when they were very small, so he is higher on the totem pole now. As they get older and leave home, there won't be any contest -- their dad comes first.

    My needs are now equal with the rest of the family because I can do that and still keep things functioning. The nuclear family has to function as a whole and that will always be a tricky dance. I always encouraged the kids to be as self-sufficient as possible, and I don't currently work, even though they are all in school all day, so there isn't a huge amount of conflict at this time. It will probably change as I begin a career and grandkids are added to the picture.

    I don't really see my well-being as being different from that of my family because if they are not okay, I'm not okay either.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  3. #13
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    8,024

    Default

    Depends on who's got the greatest need, how often and how recently.

  4. #14
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/sx
    Posts
    17,547

    Default

    It is a tossup between work and SO. Then immediate family and close friends. Then extended family and acquaintances.

    I suppose letting work tie for first is a reflection of taking care of me, since my work is extremely important to me. It is not (just) what I do for money, it is how I express myself and find fulfillment. My SO and I are each other's best friend, and the one who is always there for the other. We have been through alot, and I can't imagine anyone else putting up with all the downsides of sharing life with me. Immediate family similarly have shared years with me, and again, we look out for each other. Same with my few closest friends. Everyone else comes after.

  5. #15
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INtp
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/so
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    5,091

    Default

    Family > Friends > SO.

    I only ranked SO last because I don't have a SO right now.

    I ranked family first because I'm closer to them than anybody else. Parents and siblings are irreplaceable. You can always get new friends or a new SO.
    INtp
    5w6 or 9w1 sp/so/sx, I think
    Ravenclaw/Hufflepuff
    Neutral Good
    LII-Ne




  6. #16
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5 sx/sp
    Socionics
    ILI Ni
    Posts
    17,896

    Default

    SO

    Please provide feedback on my Nohari and Johari Window by clicking here: Nohari/Johari

    Tri-type 639

  7. #17
    Wild Card Atomic Fiend's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    ESTP
    Enneagram
    873 sx/so
    Socionics
    SLE Ti
    Posts
    7,163

    Default

    Depends on the situation.

  8. #18
    Senior Member Beargryllz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    MBTI
    INTP
    Posts
    2,739

    Default

    Members that fall into multiple categories would receive precedence over members of only one category. So, exceptionally close siblings that are also friends would take precedence over regular family and regular friends, for example. The ultimate priority would be an individual who is all 3, and barring a few extreme anecdotal abnormalities, that leaves only oneself.

  9. #19
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    Yin
    Enneagram
    One sx/sp
    Posts
    13,909

    Default

    I lack experience with the involvement of significant others, but I can speculate about myself and say the order of priority, roughly, goes like this: SO > Friend > Family.

    Family is no big deal. Mere biological relation is not something I care about, or am I impressed by being raised by or with someone. I assess people on appeals and merits, which I often find lacking or counter-acted in my family members. I did not choose my family.

    Friends I actually choose, so I can select them based on those appeals and merits I spoke of. There is actually a reason, a good reason that I've invested in that I associate with these people.

    I cannot imagine my SO falling outside the category of friend. She must be my friend for the whole thing to work. But she is therefore an exclusive, more precious sub-category of friend. The fact that I can only have one SO at a time, and that such a person is going to likely be selected on either having even more merits than my typical friend, or having highly desirably qualities that only she possesses or I can only get from one person at a time (especially when considering there are functions of monogamy that only work if exclusivity is maintained), means it's fairly rational to put higher priority on maintaining that relationship than the others.
    Go to sleep, iguana.


    _________________________________
    INTP. Type 1>6>5. sx/sp.
    Live and let live will just amount to might makes right

  10. #20
    Senior Member niffer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ENfP
    Enneagram
    8w9 sx/sp
    Posts
    1,219

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic Poriferan View Post
    I lack experience with the involvement of significant others, but I can speculate about myself and say the order of priority, roughly, goes like this: SO > Friend > Family.

    Family is no big deal. Mere biological relation is not something I care about, or am I impressed by being raised by or with someone. I assess people on appeals and merits, which I often find lacking or counter-acted in my family members. I did not choose my family.

    Friends I actually choose, so I can select them based on those appeals and merits I spoke of. There is actually a reason, a good reason that I've invested in that I associate with these people.

    I cannot imagine my SO falling outside the category of friend. She must be my friend for the whole thing to work. But she is therefore an exclusive, more precious sub-category of friend. The fact that I can only have on SO at a time, and that such a person is going to likely be selected on either having even more merits than my typical friend, or having highly desirably qualities that only she possesses or I can only get from one person at a time (especially when considering there are functions of monogamy that only work if exclusivity is maintained), means it's fairly rational to put higher priority on maintaining that relationship than the others.
    ^
    Yeh.

    But really, it depends on the situation. I mean really they're all important to me, and I'm going to use my own discretion on who to please based on how reasonable they're being within a particular situation.
    sparkly sparkly rainbow excretions

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    holy shit am I a feeler?
    if you like my avatar, it's because i took it myself! : D

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 20
    Last Post: 07-11-2013, 07:48 PM
  2. [MBTItm] who're more manipulative? entp or infj
    By Riva in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 290
    Last Post: 03-16-2011, 04:55 AM
  3. Who am I?? INFP, ENFP or INTP??? Please help.
    By Ernesto in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 08-09-2009, 12:59 AM
  4. Who would win? The Crow or Ash from Army of Darkness
    By Clownmaster in forum The Fluff Zone
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 11-29-2008, 11:40 PM
  5. New ESTP(or so they say it is) here...
    By zarita in forum Welcomes and Introductions
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 03-05-2008, 06:06 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO