I've posted about this in my blog a few months ago:
"How to be mature?" CHECKLIST!
- Pretend you're feeling sick everytime you're near a MacDonalds (adults hate MacDonalds, or at least they pretend to)
- Talk about architecture. Compare the architecture style of all towns you've been to in an intellectual conversation.
- Refuse to listen to any music that isn't older than 15 years. This excludes music of all artists that have been active for over 15 years, easy listening, mature rock, jazz, latin american and classical music. Of all the music older than 15 years, you'll have to refuse to listen to hardcore, metal, europop and disco.
- Inspect the entire house with a microscope and freak over every single tiny little piece of dust or dirt you find.
- Don't talk calmly when you're irritated, yell. Yelling makes you seem more serious when you're an adult.
- Don't have any fun, fun is for children.
- Use complicated words and eat complicated food. While these things make you look nerdy when you're young, they'll make you seem adventurous and exciting when you're an adult, even when you're not.
- Hate teenagers and look down on children. This will make you look better than them.
- Don't take too much care of you're looks, otherwhise people will think you're a prostitute, or even worse, desperate for love, which you don't want too admit at all, even though your eggs are starting to age.
- When it rains, take a raincoat or an umbrella. Not taking any of those makes you seem like a teenager who wants to show they're not a pussy and like I said before, true adults hate teenagers.
- Talk with a poshy accent. Not having a poshy accent will make you look poor, or worse, like an undereducated teenager!
- Make a nasty face when you see someone have a snack, especially when they're fat. Fat people aren't supposed to snack, that's irresponsible.
- When you're having a party, only give your guests trendy food. Trendy food makes you seem younger and takes all the attention away from your wrinkles.
- Only have fresh sandwichspread, yoghurt and cucumbers on your sandwich. Eating fresh food makes you seem fresh and young.