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  1. #111
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    Okay, I have no idea what you are talking about. Like what? My acnes scars?

    Thor is not something I'd think by looking at Halla. Only associate because he mentioned him once or twice and dressed up in Halloween (or whatever the occasion was, but yeah I remember the pic vaguely) as Thor.
    I've known men who have a scar which actually enhances their physical attractiveness, as it can give that rough look some girls like. If that happens to also coincide with who they are as a person, it just enhances their appeal.

    I know one ISTP who's going bald. He's very self conscious about it. And yet, I have no clue why. If *anyone* can make that look good, it's him. It suits him. It adds to his appeal as a bad boy. It intensifies his steel blue eyes. It accentuates his great build even more so.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    So how the person is would still shine through the burn scars? Then you need to write that differently. It doesn't shine through HOW one looks but irrespective of how one looks.

    But then you go ahead and say they go together and can't be totally separated So a burning accident would prevent that from happening again then...or the person would just have a new personality because he/she was a burn victim? I'm confused.

    I know someone who's a burn victim actually. She got hot water over her when she was 4 or something. And when you see her, she's never self conscious about it as she's lived with it all her life. You notice it when you look closely, even though the scars are very visible. And yet..it doesn't in any way attract attention in a way that you'd find yourself staring at it. It doesn't detract from her grace, or her fragile build. I don't think it detracts or adds to her physical appeal at all.
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  2. #112
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    I do sometimes wonder if women are more genuinely attracted to personality than men, though. I do wonder that, because it seems to me that I'm usually most attracted to the guy who I think has the most interesting personality, as long as he's decent looking and not obese he doesn't have to necessarily look a certain way.

    Is this more common with females?

  3. #113
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    Yeah, and those preferences are still subjective. Objective indicates that we, collectively, can measure a standard: like youth, health, symmetry.
    I was equating objective with a more conscious kind of attraction (oh my, he has beautiful eyes!) and subjective with a less conscious draw to someone's physical features.

    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    We can even say, for example, that some women on this site get flirted with more often than others. This may be due to an objective agreement that these women have balanced facial features and decent figures. But I also think, even on-line, that the people who get the most attention get it because of personality, too. It's a combination of the two things, not just one or the other.
    Of course. My point being that you don't see body language in a photo and people still tend to get drawn more to some faces than others AND ALSO if you like the interaction online with some very much and months after see his/her face and find it unattractive, the personality won't matter much.

    And body language doesn't even enter the equation the entire time! This is why I differentiate between three kinds of attraction.


    I'll have to conclude that either my english is not up to par (I swear people just seem to get me in portuguese right away) or my delivery really stings a lot of people because this is becoming quite recurrent - can't seem to get my point across at all on these forums.

    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    I do sometimes wonder if women are more genuinely attracted to personality than men, though. I do wonder that, because it seems to me that I'm usually most attracted to the guy who I think has the most interesting personality, as long as he's decent looking and not obese he doesn't have to necessarily look a certain way.

    Is this more common with females?
    I think so, much in the same way some (N)F traits are more common in females.

    But as an NF male, I'm the same for the most part.

  4. #114
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Satine View Post
    I've known men who have a scar which actually enhances their physical attractiveness, as it can give that rough look some girls like. If that happens to also coincide with who they are as a person, it just enhances their appeal.
    I wonder who analogously would benefit from acne scars? A geek? :P

  5. #115
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    I was equating objective with a more conscious kind of attraction (oh my, he has beautiful eyes!) and subjective with a less conscious draw to someone's physical features.


    Of course. My point being that you don't see body language in a photo and people still tend to get drawn more to some faces than others AND ALSO if you like the interaction online with some very much and months after see his/her face and find it unattractive, the personality won't matter much.
    Ok. You can see personality quirks in some people's pics though, even if you can't see body language, even if it's not like meeting someone in person. Take a look around at some of the albums on this site.

    And body language doesn't even enter the equation the entire time! This is why I differentiate between three kinds of attraction.
    Yeah, okay.


    I'll have to conclude that either my english is not up to par (I swear people just seem to get me in portuguese right away) or my delivery really stings a lot of people because this is becoming quite recurrent - can't seem to get my point across at all on these forums.
    Your first language is Portuguese? That may explain a lot. Seriously.

    However, your delivery seems to come across as defensive rather than harsh...it's like you're cranky more than mean. In the past I've been more annoyed by your tone, not so much offended by your harshness.


    I think so, much in the same way some (N)F traits are more common in females.

    But as an NF male, I'm the same for the most part.
    I think it may have more to do with being NF, or maybe even just being N. I hope I don't get killed for saying that.

  6. #116
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    I wonder who analogously would benefit from acne scars? A geek? :P
    Personally, I'd say that to me the scars would be irrelevant, as with the burn victim. Actually, I know one guy who has a lot of acne and in which case the scarring once again adds to his bad boy image. Not sure if it's my cup of tea, but I can see it working for him
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  7. #117
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    i'm always analyzing shit in my head...not judging...just exploring the reasons for things and i often notice how someone's outward appearance has very little imo to do with genes and everything to do with who's in there...i have felt this very deeply and i'm not quite sure i'm capable of stringing the words together in such a way that you might understand.

    but i believe pretty strongly that you could take one persons soul and put it into the body of someone else...someone perceived as plain...someone that would never attract attention and they would become transformed into an entirely different looking individual...

    sometimes you see strung out street kids...poor upbringing...no social skills...maybe they look trashy...talk trashy...don't take care of themselves...feel worthless...are totally hardened by life...and then you put a beautiful soul in there...someone with an inner strength and confidence and a great love and compassion for people...and that person...who's genes weren't ever bad she just didn't know what to do with it..is transformed into someone who turns heads everywhere she goes...

    i just honestly think it's not the gene cocktail that shapes your appearance but your personality that does.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  8. #118
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    I wonder who analogously would benefit from acne scars? A geek? :P
    I think Bill Murray and Edward James Olmos are both attractive, and they both have acne scars. Nobody would necessarily just look at a picture of either and think HOTTIE! but taking the whole personality into account, it works for them.

    Yes, it definitely pays to be conventionally attractive (though in some cases it can complicate life for the attractive person), but having a few flaws doesn't mean all is lost. I rarely think someone is ugly. I tend to take the whole person into account, and actually prefer average looking or interesting looking guys to conventionally gorgeous ones.

    There are definitely men I flat-out don't find attractive physically, but that's just life, isn't it? I don't expect everyone in the world to think I'm attractive.
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  9. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by Satine View Post
    Personally, I'd say that to me the scars would be irrelevant, as with the burn victim. Actually, I know one guy who has a lot of acne and in which case the scarring once again adds to his bad boy image. Not sure if it's my cup of tea, but I can see it working for him
    My ex has some acne scars and women seem to love him...because he has great bone structure, beautiful eyes, long eyelashes, perfect teeth, carries himself confidently, and of course his delivery...his personality...he says he "twinkles" :rolleyes2:

    But yeah, in his case acne scars do not make him less attractive, but it's admittedly because genetically and physically speaking he has a lot of other basic features going for him other than the smoothness of his skin. His personality/presentation helps, though.

  10. #120
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    Ok. You can see personality quirks in some people's pics though, even if you can't see body language, even if it's not like meeting someone in person. Take a look around at some of the albums on this site.
    I think those personality quirks you can pick up from some people's pics would be in the sense of "how would the general populace react to this face" and try to tell a story by it. "Oh, I associate this face with goofiness" etc In the end, imo, it proves my point that our face shapes our personality via how people react to it over the years.


    Your first language is Portuguese? That may explain a lot. Seriously.

    However, your delivery seems to come across as defensive rather than harsh...it's like you're cranky more than mean. In the past I've been more annoyed by your tone, not so much offended by your harshness.
    I'm Portuguese yeah. I don't see myself as sounding defensive, but I can see how you'd think that, if we were to take certain topics as example. I'm a bitter idealist and a moral perfectionist.

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