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  1. #11
    figsfiggyfigs
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post
    Yeah, I know I'm coming off as a stereotypical INFP here. Self-absorbed and meandering.

    It's really good that you moved forward. Did you feel like your experiences got much more dynamic during your college years? I here there are 3 types of people: Party animals, study animals, and those who fade between the twilight of both of these worlds. I would imagine it would be difficult to find balance, but maybe not. It largely depends on who you associate with.
    when I was still an ENFP/J, I was a pseudo party animal for sure, before I turned it all around, I didn't care very much. I did pretty well in school(before dropping out) without even trying, it was natural for me, so being a pseudo-party animal was a default. In college, the first year is always the "wild party animal" year, where you want to experience everything you missed out on( I did). I quickly got sick of it and realized it was not for me. I still partied every now and then, out of obligation mostly.

    Moving out, working a generic cashiers job was a slap in the face. When I realized just how sheltered and oblivious I've been my entire life, I started working hard. I was managing( doing the bosses job) 4 different stores after a few months; Because I was responsible for thousands of dollars each day, I quickly developed a strong Te(my F is now 11%).

    When I made the decision to go back to college; I RARELY go out to parties, no matter how close they are. Usually I'll make an hour appearance so people don't bitch about me being anti-social. LOL

    I spend most of my time studying, or entertaining myself. After a long time of trying to figure out who you are, what you want, and what is important to you, I think you will find the perfect balance to suit YOU tater.

    That might mean you might party a little more than you study, but it is about you being happy and content with who you finally choose to become. A happy person is a healthy person; I believe once you find yourself, you will begin to make the correct, life-improving decisions you are searching for.

    I think association with people does effect what decisions people make, however, your independence and the ultimate outcome rest in your hand. You have to be able to say no, and not let people persuade you into doing something you think might effect your self-growth. It is hard when you are at a young age, but after a while, even if it upsets people, at least you are doing the right thing for yourself. : )

    Half of my friends are party animals, and the other half are like me. No matter what they ask me to do , or how they try to persuade me, I do what I think is right for me to do.

  2. #12
    Pumpernickel
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    Quote Originally Posted by You'reWrongI'mRight View Post

    I know you said no MBTI's, but I figured that I would add, that I was an extremely unhealthy ENFP before I made the decision to own up and turn my life around. and now I think I'm a pretty healthy ENTJ.
    uh what

  3. #13
    figsfiggyfigs
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    Quote Originally Posted by JustHer View Post
    uh what
    I was just refering to developing my Te, and J, not saying that an ENFP <ENTJ. not at all.

    I hope thats not what you thought I said? : )

  4. #14
    Ginkgo
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    Quote Originally Posted by JustHer View Post
    uh what
    NO MBTI Discrepancy. We could probably go on about this in every thread with the multitude of ways people look at MBTI. I would go further but yeah.

    I'll respond more to this later. Someone needs to go to the doctor.

  5. #15
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    First and foremost, read this wiki entry about setting goals. Rephrase your goals to fit these SMART criteria. It's a tested management method for setting goals you can actually work with rather than vague ideas. Make sure every one of your goals follows the major term described in the article. Also, state all your goals positively, rather then negatively. Your goals are what you want to work towards, not what you want to avoid.

    If you want you can post your rephrased goals in this thread and other members can give more specific help.

    For me, rather than change a lot at once, it's better to start small. For instance, taking a job at McDonalds might not be what you want, but if it's better than your current situation you should take the option if it comes along. You can always take better options as they come along later.
    (removed)

  6. #16
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    As for your specific points, there may be a couple I can give you advice on.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post

    Let me start by listing the number of things about the past or present that have coaxed me into my current position. This isn't a wallowing session, just the facts. I need to change all of these things.

    -First and foremost, I want hope. I want to know all of my desires will come to fruition, and that there is a will to move foreword. I want someone to put a carrot in front of my face and say, "Move! The carrot's right here if you can get it!"
    Hope will come when you start seeing improvement in your situation. Having a plan will help.

    -I am 20 years of age.
    Can't help you with this one, but give it a year or so and I'm sure this will have changed.

    -I am jobless, unemployed.
    ANYTHING will do wonders for your self esteem compared to sitting at home. If there are employment agencies in your town go to them, a school counsellor might have ideas as well, even though it's not necessarily their job, their experience with people your age provides them with knowledge of these things. Handing out open applications to places you think might need somebody now or in the future, a friend of mine went to a dozen stores around town one day handing out his Résumé, in each store he asked if he could talk to the manager or highest clerk present, introduced himself and explained that he would like to work at that store and why. Pick stores that suit you, maybe they relate to your hobby, or your clothing style, or your interest. Don't be afraid to work lots of hours either, it'll be good for your wallet.

    -I have a driver's license, but no car or personal insurance.

    -I live with my parents. My environment is oppressive.

    -I have not graduated from high school yet because of medical setbacks and sheer laziness, though I can drop in a half credit to get a scholarship and a diploma online.
    Considering your financial problems you're not yet ready to worry about these things. Get your high school diploma and endure whatever oppresion your parents give you knowing that as soon as you have money you are going to live on your own. Besides, once you have a job, you'll be home less anyway.

    -I don't have many friends. (really, just 2 who I keep in contact with)

    -I don't have a girlfriend. In fact, I haven't had one in more than 3 years.

    -I haven't had sex. But when I do, I would prefer it be someone I loved.

    -I really want to get wasted. Like, just smashed off my ass, just to see the world from a less rational viewpoint. For a long time. There comes a point where being sober for too long is actually being drunk with boredom.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    Sports would be good for you. It helps take your mind of things, gets you in shape, and if the club offers a social life it can help you with the above mentioned things as well.
    If you're bad at sports, I wouldn't pick a team that's too competitive or tight, you could stand negatively.
    I picked rowing because you do have a team, but events like this are more about fun rather than winning anyway.
    (removed)

  7. #17
    Playnerd Timeless's Avatar
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    What exactly is it you want?

  8. #18
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by You'reWrongI'mRight View Post
    I was an extremely unhealthy ENFP before I made the decision to own up and turn my life around. and now I think I'm a pretty healthy ENTJ.
    This has to be one of the most ridiculous posts I have ever read.

  9. #19
    figsfiggyfigs
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    This has to be one of the most ridiculous posts I have ever read.
    ahhhhhhhh why do people misunderstand what I meant!!! fo fums sake!


    I'm just adding in what the truth. -_-

    it doesn't really mean anything. It is how I scored a few years back.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by You'reWrongI'mRight View Post
    ahhhhhhhh why do people misunderstand what I meant!!! fo fums sake!

    Good Lord.

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