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Thread: In stories only

  1. #1
    Senior Member ObeyBunny's Avatar
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    Default In stories only

    Let's make a list:

    What are some stupid things you read in crapy fiction that nobody does in real life?
    ---
    1. Lighting matches and letting them burn down to your fingers, all the while thinking of your best friend who is an Alcoholic.

    2. Picking up a photo that is on your fireplace, hugging the photo to your chest, begin crying while looking upwards, and saying a phrase like "I hope you're in a better place" or "dream of me."
    Q: "What is the process of seeking the truth?"
    A: "Distilled liquor"

    Q: "If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?"
    A: "Between a starving prostitute and a steak sandwich."

    Q:How would a mathematician capture an elephant?
    A:He would build a cage, step inside, and rename his new location as "outside."

  2. #2
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    3. Putting an object in a loved one's hand, and then pressing their fingers into a fist around the object
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



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  3. #3

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    Bad guys pointing a gun sideways.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  4. #4
    full of love Kingfisher's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EffEmDoubleyou View Post
    Bad guys pointing a gun sideways.
    no, that definitely happens in real life.


    i was noticing just the other day how things that seem very unusual to some people are pretty normal to other people's experiences-
    i was talking about something, saying "this is so weird, this never happens!" but i was met with this pretty unanimous response of "no, that happens all the time."
    haha. i can't remember what we were talking about though.

  5. #5

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    Well, if it really happens, I hope I run into one of them if I'm ever in a gunfight
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  6. #6
    Reptilian Snuggletron's Avatar
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    walk on water

  7. #7
    What is, is. Arthur Schopenhauer's Avatar
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    1. Long-winded monologues. Verbal; generally done by the antagonist or a sentimental protagonist, etc.

    2. The protagonists don't die. Even when the minion vs. hero ratio is something similar to 100quintillion to 1 (and maybe a sidekick). I for one, would be dead if attacked by even one, maybe I could last until two, evil-indentured goon(s). Of course, not all fiction that does this is crap, I'm just saying.

    3. They get the girl... *sobs... on the inside...*
    INTJ | 5w4 - Sp/Sx/So | 5-4-(9/1) | RLoEI | Melancholic-Choleric | Johari & Nohari

    This will not end well...
    But it will at least be poetic, I suppose...

    Hmm... But what if it does end well?
    Then I suppose it will be a different sort of poetry, a preferable sort...
    A sort I could become accustomed to...



  8. #8
    What is, is. Arthur Schopenhauer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adoamros View Post
    walk on water
    Marry me.
    INTJ | 5w4 - Sp/Sx/So | 5-4-(9/1) | RLoEI | Melancholic-Choleric | Johari & Nohari

    This will not end well...
    But it will at least be poetic, I suppose...

    Hmm... But what if it does end well?
    Then I suppose it will be a different sort of poetry, a preferable sort...
    A sort I could become accustomed to...



  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by ObeyBunny View Post
    Let's make a list:

    What are some stupid things you read in crapy fiction that nobody does in real life?
    ---
    1. Lighting matches and letting them burn down to your fingers, all the while thinking of your best friend who is an Alcoholic.

    2. Picking up a photo that is on your fireplace, hugging the photo to your chest, begin crying while looking upwards, and saying a phrase like "I hope you're in a better place" or "dream of me."
    NFPs actually do this. I don't know what you're talking about.

  10. #10
    Senior Member ZPowers's Avatar
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    Someone plants a bomb in your car or house, along with a note that you are expected to read seconds before the bomb goes off, I guess because it's so to them important that you're aware that you're about to die that they expend what is probably an inordinate amount of additional effort setting the bomb to detonate at just the right time or use unneeded complex engineering for to connect it to some arbitrary thing.

    One liners.

    Complex death traps.

    Basically, any unnecessarily inefficient/risky scenario for murdering someone
    Does he want a pillow for his head?

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