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  1. #1
    is an ambi-turner BRMC117's Avatar
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    Default Not having an emotional response

    I just found out that I am going to be an Uncle. I really was happy for my brother and his wife...its just that I really couldnt show it. I really didnt want to jump up and down, or get all big eyed. I was just like...cool.

    So I was wondering, when someone presents you with information that should strike emotions, is it hard to show? did you really want to show it?
    "I put the fires out."
    "you made them worse."
    "worse...or better?"

  2. #2
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    well, maybe once you see the kid, everything will hit you.

    that, or you have aspergers.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by BRMC117 View Post
    So I was wondering, when someone presents you with information that should strike emotions, is it hard to show? did you really want to show it?
    Yes, it is hard to show. No, I don't/didn't want to show it. My immediate response to anything emotion-evoking is indifference...until the emotion hits me a bit later, it can only be a few seconds...or it might never show up. And all the while I'm thinking that I should really show positive emotions, but they're just not there..I am...cool. I feel so fake during that time and the feeling stays for quite a long while after the real emotional response kicks in or not. And then the guilt sets in.

    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    well, maybe once you see the kid, everything will hit you.
    I think so too.

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    is an ambi-turner BRMC117's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sky is PINK! View Post
    And then the guilt sets in.
    Ah yes, the guilt
    "I put the fires out."
    "you made them worse."
    "worse...or better?"

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    Vaguely Precise Seymour's Avatar
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    I relate a lot to the OP. I neither gush particularly well, nor do I feel appropriate emotions on demand. In some situations I feel guilty for the lack of enthusiasm/emotion I should feel.

    I think part of that is simply the nature of Fiin particular feeling compelled to be genuine and being aware of one's own emotional state.

  6. #6
    Senior Member ObeyBunny's Avatar
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    Default Advice shwos love.

    Quote Originally Posted by BRMC117 View Post
    I just found out that I am going to be an Uncle. I really was happy for my brother and his wife...its just that I really couldnt show it. I really didnt want to jump up and down, or get all big eyed. I was just like...cool.
    Are you a closet INTx? When you found out that you were going to be an uncle, did you offer your brother and his wife advice as apposed to showing much emotion?

    (Example: Cool, you're going to have a baby. You should baby-proof your house before he's born. If you can, try to put all the poisons and cleaning fluids under lock and key.)

    Because that's a very NT type of way to express your emotions.
    Q: "What is the process of seeking the truth?"
    A: "Distilled liquor"

    Q: "If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?"
    A: "Between a starving prostitute and a steak sandwich."

    Q:How would a mathematician capture an elephant?
    A:He would build a cage, step inside, and rename his new location as "outside."

  7. #7
    is an ambi-turner BRMC117's Avatar
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    Its kinda odd, now that I think about it, one of my friends told me not to long ago that he got a new car. I was more excited for him about that then my own brother. We dont have bad blood, and we dont fight...I dont know
    "I put the fires out."
    "you made them worse."
    "worse...or better?"

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by BRMC117 View Post
    Its kinda odd, now that I think about it, one of my friends told me not to long ago that he got a new car. I was more excited for him about that then my own brother. We dont have bad blood, and we dont fight...I dont know
    Don't worry about it that much. You haven't seen the baby, held him/her in your arms, I assume you don't even know the sex yet...so...it's like he/she doesn't exist yet. The excitement isn't kicked in yet. Do you have previous experience with kids? They tend to grow on you with time. Well, some of them anyway.

  9. #9
    is an ambi-turner BRMC117's Avatar
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    no, I haven't had any experience with kids that much. I think you are right thanks for the help you guys, this is why I love this forum!
    "I put the fires out."
    "you made them worse."
    "worse...or better?"

  10. #10
    Senior Member Chunes's Avatar
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    I experienced the same thing. I was less enthusiastic about being an uncle than just about everything else.

    Part of it might be the resentment caused by the expectation to have a relationship with someone just because they're blood.

    *shrug*
    "If you would convince a man that he does wrong, do right. But do not care to convince him. Men will believe what they see. Let them see."
    Thoreau

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