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  1. #21
    Senior Member proximo's Avatar
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    A lot of people aren't comfortable with showing emotions in front of others. Could be that it'll suddenly hit you, and you'll say to yourself one day whilst washing the dishes, "Hey, I'm gonna be an uncle! How awesome is that?" and you'll laugh to yourself as you continue to scrub, and that'll be it

    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    well, maybe once you see the kid, everything will hit you.

    that, or you have aspergers.
    Just a minute... are you seriously saying here that anybody who doesn't typically respond to good news by crying and jumping up and down and screaming with delight, is therefore autistic?

    Cos if so, about 90% of the men in this world, and a good portion of the women too, must be autistic.

    Life's not a movie... we don't all follow scripts and respond as the director says we "ought to", in his opinion, respond to our cues.
    I'm male and over 30, FYI.
    Preferences: 20% Extravert, 98% Intuitive, 68% Thinker, 17% Perceiving

  2. #22
    Senior Member Gerbah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BRMC117 View Post
    I just found out that I am going to be an Uncle. I really was happy for my brother and his wife...its just that I really couldnt show it. I really didnt want to jump up and down, or get all big eyed. I was just like...cool.

    So I was wondering, when someone presents you with information that should strike emotions, is it hard to show? did you really want to show it?
    I don't think your response is abnormal just because it wasn't the kitsch response. Even mothers all respond differently to having their own children.

    It is hard for me to fake emotions I'm not feeling, if what I'm feeling is really far from the feigned emotion. I find what helps in such situations is to tell myself that the situation isn't about me, so in your situation, if I felt as you do, I would focus more on the couple's happiness and respond to that and mirror it.
    the shoheen ho of the wind of the west and the lulla lo of the soft sea billow - Alfred Graves

  3. #23
    Senior Member proximo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gerbah View Post
    I don't think your response is abnormal just because it wasn't the kitsch response. Even mothers all respond differently to having their own children.
    So true. I remember the times I've been in maternity wards and seen the huge differences. Some cuddling their precious bundles, not wanting to let them go, glowing with pride and love. Others exhausted, confused, looking over at the lump sleeping in the cot and not quite knowing what to do. Others still, matter-of-fact, casual, almost absent-mindedly businesslike as they go through the motions whilst chatting with others about everyday things.

    It is hard for me to fake emotions I'm not feeling, if what I'm feeling is really far from the feigned emotion. I find what helps in such situations is to tell myself that the situation isn't about me, so in your situation, if I felt as you do, I would focus more on the couple's happiness and respond to that and mirror it.
    This is great advice. I'm gonna make a mental note of this for those times when I feel like I'm under pressure to give an emotional response
    I'm male and over 30, FYI.
    Preferences: 20% Extravert, 98% Intuitive, 68% Thinker, 17% Perceiving

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