I only had crushes on real people and I always told them about it. I was way too adorable, I had a wedding with a different boy every few weeks. Sometimes multiple times with the same one. You won't be spotting me doing the same thing another time. Anyways, I have a hard time having crushes on celebrities. I tried it multiple times, but it just doesn't work. I need to know someone in person. I never understood those girls who had a crush on Brad Pitt, for example.
I was sitting outside the classroom waiting to go in, and I saw an airplane hit the tower. The TV was obviously on. I used to fly myself and I said, "There's one terrible pilot."
- George W. Bush -
There is nothing strange, creepy, or wrong about swarms of people posting pics of you all around the internet confessing their undying love and need to have sexual intercourse with you. If it was someone famous, great and prestigious, such as myself, it would only make sense that they'd want to jump bones the first time they met. All those years of built up hours of escapism would equate to one powerful experience until the body guards escort the lady (or men for that matter) out. It could always be worse, ya know? Someone might have to call the police to handle such an lethal love. Fatal attraction is one of the strongest of it's kind, and the stuff of real romance, no? But, who wants to get the police intervening in love. Lets watch it balm in he hearts of 10 year old girls who have driven their parents further in debt for buying all of Justin Bieber's apparail, and perfomance tickets. Who knows, they might not grow out of this true love and graduate to groupies during those loaned-tuition college years. I say, full speed ahead!
In the end, the attraction is harmless. Any kid stuck infront of a TV long enough is going to develop some connection to a specific character, actor, cook or celebrity. I figure its better than a fascination with all the murder scenes. Plus, the attraction is often superfical, or physical. What they see or hear, they appreciate. Otherwise, the celebrity wouldn't be celebrated. Then, what we do with all our time? Live our own lives? What, are you crazy?
But, speaking of celebrities living their own lives, I'd like to mention that I'd like to mention I want to have sexual relations with Kim Kardashian. Oh, don't give me that face. Yes, people think she is stupid. However, I have to remind you that you do know who she is don't you? And you've seen someone, if not yourself, purchase one of those magazines with her on the cover? And I can bet you know she has a cheap, self-made pornography out? She's making money off all this too. So, I wouldn't be so quick to judge her menal aptitude. She clearly has finacial fortitude. Yet and still, I'd probably approach her, if I met her, as if she was a dumb blonde. Then, I'd proceed to hit on her like she was a dumb blonde.
Anyway, this topic is veering into the bullshit of social commentary, and should be returned to the topic of softcore pornography. That's always fun. I'll get us started:
* I'm sure someone, somewhere has a childhood crush on her. She is holding an ice cream. Kids love ice cream. So, were still on topic.
First crushes I ever remember having, on both of them:
And on Alisdair from 'You Can't Do That On Television':
And a little bit of a crush on Howling Mad Murdock, though he mainly became the hero which shaped my life (which may not come as such a surprise to some of you)
When I got a little older, it was practically every male in the cast of 'The Young Riders' :
And when I was a teenager, it was these fellas:
I had just a little, tiny bit of a thing for the British fellas, and I eventually wound up marrying one. I think I'm over it now though!
I had way too many crushes too, if I were to make a comprehensive list it would be long and most likely, very embarrassing.
"Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get, but if you work really hard, and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you...amazing things will happen" --Conan O'Brien