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  1. #31
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
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    I think most people are really nice and polite on here. Maybe I spent too much of my youth on Stormfront. I just consider the fact that I don't actually know anyone here. I don't know what they're dealing with in real life, and I don't know why they're here or what they're looking for. After my initial frustration with something someone says, I usually consider the fact that it's difficult to tell what unfamiliar people are saying, or how they actually meant a comment, when you're online. This is especially true if they don't use lots of emoticons.

    There are times when I don't understand my own close friends when we're online due to a lack of body language cues that help you understand another person's intent irl. It's occasionally difficult to know when someone is teasing, or being playfully sarcastic, or actually meaning to be hurtful.
    There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

  2. #32
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    Weird there was another post here. Fine I will have a go.

    Rude is saying something with no context, no irony, no initiation, no point, no humor, with the intent of simply emoting your frustration onto another or getting a reaction.

    By this standard there are a lot of things that could seem rude, as it does inspire a reaction, but that doesn't mean it lacks the above. In those cases people should be less sensitive.

  3. #33
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    I think that most of these assessments are true, especially Elaur's and The Sky is BLUE's. However, it is reasonable to suggest that many of the posters here, and in real life, are just inherently rude because of various circumstances. They might not adhere to social norms, or consider other people. They may gratuitously instigate fights for the purpose of amusement.

    Others may not be trying to be rude. They are simply trying to correct an issue for the sake of clarity. Unfortunately, this behavior is often misconstrued as a personal jab to someone's character. This is defines one of the primary differences between T and F personality types. Ts often strive for factual relevancy, while Fs strive for personal authenticity. In the realm of communication, these types can clash as a result.

    I have been rude in the past, and I apologize. I hope this post wasn't rude by the reader's standards.

  4. #34
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
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    So I'm seeing the theories that:

    1. There are people pushing buttons, either because they are jerks in real life or like the power of being a jerk online. (This probably includes trolls)

    2. Actions on the internet don't matter as much because it's just the internet.

    3. Certain types might come across more rude because they don't have a niceness factor built in. T's can come across roughly because they focus on "facts."

    4. People are abrasive and think that other people might consider them rude when they are just being themselves. They don't want to change being what they consider "themselves."

    I discount 3 and 4 in my mind because (3) the types that I think are the most abrasive in real life are not the types coming across as overly rude here. There is also a large difference between stating facts to argue points and attacking people. Plenty of T's of differing personality types are not rude, and I have seen F's on this board go psycho rude. I think you also can't go by what personality type people say they are. It would be possible to join the forum and claim to be a certain type just to claim intelligence and not feel the need to back up that intelligence.

    I don't think (4) is valid because the people who even realize they might be abrasive probably are taking it into account often enough that they don't come across as constantly being rude.

    (2) is strange to me, because everyone online is a person. There is no large difference between being online and talking to someone real life, other than them not being able to punch you. On that note, I probably don't go around saying I hate people in real life (oh, yes I do, but only to a few people) and I also don't get to consider my responses as much as I do on a forum. I think that "playtoy forum" might be a possible reason for some the behavior.

    I come back to (1) as a reason for most of the out of the ordinary behavior I see. I guess it is good old fashioned trolling with a cheering section.

    (As an aside, sadly, I've come to question the number of people who are actually acting out mental issues. I know many people who do have mental issues use the net in healthy ways, but I am sure there are plenty that don't.)

  5. #35
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    What the--?

    We need names.


    I've seen people be tiresome, but I have no idea who or what is rude.



    (Is she talking about me? Is she? She has a kniiife!)
    Bellison uncorked a flood of horrible profanity, which, translated, meant, "This is extremely unusual."

    Boy meets Grr

  6. #36
    Ginkgo
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    I think the term "rude" is being thrown around like a volleyball here without anyone actually defining it.

    The fact is that there are individual standards of rudeness among people. Therefore, it is largely undefinable.

    You're implying that you believe that everyone should adhere to your standard of rudeness. This will never happen.

    The only common denominator we have is the forum rules. These forum rules should be enforced with minimum flexibility, as they allow for a certain brink of rudeness that the majority can agree on.

    It is saddening to see forumers spitefully attack each other. However, I do not have the liberty of lording over them with my own personal standards. One can only hope that the moderators do their job.

  7. #37
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elaur View Post
    I come back to (1) as a reason for most of the out of the ordinary behavior I see. I guess it is good old fashioned trolling with a cheering section.

    (As an aside, sadly, I've come to question the number of people who are actually acting out mental issues. I know many people who do have mental issues use the net in healthy ways, but I am sure there are plenty that don't.)
    Cultural and linguistic differences can make people seem abrasive as well though, right? Could you give examples of what you've seen?
    There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

  8. #38
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    She has a kniiife!)
    Yeah, I worry about the knife.

  9. #39
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    I'm usually rude to people when I feel that they've been rude or unfair to me, accusing me of things or holding me to things I don't feel I should bear any responsibility for. Of course that's more slightly likely online due to lack of consequences, but I will do it in real life, it simply takes slightly more provocation. Chances are that by the time you see me acting rude on here, I would have started to sound threatening and have my face turn red in real life (though I'm also more likely to try and find an excuse to get away from the provocation in real life before that happens). In fact, sometimes the time needed to write my post and actually see what I'm saying actually causes me to SCALE BACK my initial hostility.

    You do NOT want to know some of the things I've almost posted (and probably would have said aloud) before I saw how they looked in writing. I'm probably much more caustic verbally, if anything.

    Anyway, I'd say the reason for online rudeness is simple:

    1. The person is always rude. There are a lot of rude people in real life, so of course there are going to be rude people online. You probably just don't notice because you don't end up talking to the majority of people who show up in the same place as you in real life. In school or at work, you maybe talk to the people who sit next to you. A few old friends you met in school, work, or activities. Maybe you talk to your family. Here, you talk to everyone who shows up, most likely.

    2. The common theory, the one that people are going to be rude because of their anonymity. Well, that's true, but I think the potential benefits of anonymity outweigh that cost. Many will use it appropriately.

  10. #40
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    All the points are quite valid and I can see them happening.

    In the first case (1) I find it confusing, because it all depends on how you define trolling. My own definition of trolling is straightforward. It means you attack another person with flames, which is unwarranted under any kind of circumstances. Kind of like someone who punches another person in real life, after getting into a quarrel with them. He/ she can claim that he/she was "baited" into throwing the punch, whatever that means, but I'll put the onus on him/her to avoid throwing that punch. Still, I can see how easily any verbal disagreement can disintegrate into name-calling, then escalating into physical violence. I just abhor it. Courtesy should beget courtesy.

    In (2) that argument is not quite valid to me, because personality is personality no matter where you go. But I definitely understand why some people feel freer to be a different person on the net, while some feel freer to be their true self. It all depends on perception.

    In (3), I actually think there is some validity to this perspective. Discounting the outright rudeness of (1), there might be times when people focus too much on content and not enough on the implication of the words. I won't apply the T/F dichotomy here. But its also equally true that we'll become neurotic, if we are forced to watch our words excessively. In other words, a fine balance exists between your rude and my rude.

    In (4), what you state might actually be true. People have different characters, jackasses being jackasses. There are people who conciously pushes buttons for fun. There are people who try to take that into account and still end up pushing buttons. In other words, we can only be ourselves. And if we don't take to each other, we can only keep away lol

    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post
    I think the term "rude" is being thrown around like a volleyball here without anyone actually defining it.

    The fact is that there are individual standards of rudeness among people. Therefore, it is largely undefinable.
    This is about right.

    Edit: It was me who annoyingly took off a post and did it again. Hopefully, it's okay this time because it was a short summary and no one quoted it.

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