The underlying principle of manners is to make other people feel comfortable. There isn't a particular style of manners I expect, but ideally see good manners as the ability to adapt to a variety of cultural styles of interacting which can include some levels of "rudeness" or super-politeness. If there is good intent and I am aware of it, then someone being rude as an attempt to include me, or someone pulling out a chair for me, or someone calling me "miss", etc. are all the same in my book. Within the range of my own personal limitations, I try to accommodate the other person's style as best I can.