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Thread: Handshakes

  1. #21
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    Now, about the cheek kiss, how's it work? Where I'm from no one does it, except if they visit Quebec where the kiss kiss thing is standard among the francophone population. Otherwise it would be viewed as affected (because no one else does it). I kind of assumed it was just something people did on TV or that had caught on amongst celebs. Do you just air kiss? Do both parties kiss at the same time?

  2. #22
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Now, about the cheek kiss, how's it work? Where I'm from no one does it, except if they visit Quebec where the kiss kiss thing is standard among the francophone population. Otherwise it would be viewed as affected (because no one else does it). I kind of assumed it was just something people did on TV or that had caught on amongst celebs. Do you just air kiss? Do both parties kiss at the same time?
    I always kissed once towards someone's left cheek on the approach, and then on the right. It is essentially air kissing because you're really just briefly pressing the other persons cheeks against your own.

  3. #23
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Is it so rare for women to return with a firm handshake?
    I have no idea, but...

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Is this a bad thing? Men, what do you think?
    ...Anyone that thinks this is lame.
    Go to sleep, iguana.


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  4. #24
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Quinlan View Post
    I never understood the whole handshake thing, I could care less about the firmness of your grip.
    Yeah, I agree. But some people place a lot of importance on it.

  5. #25
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    I can't stand a limp handshake from either gender. It seems weak and indecisive. The dead fish handshake creeps me out. I don't understand it. It's the equivalent of someone trying to kiss you and you just letting your lips go droopy and not reciprocating. Equally annoying is when someone gives you their hand like they're the Queen of England, palm down.

    I give a firm, but not deathgrip, handshake.
    Something Witty

  6. #26
    Patron Saint Of Smileys Gloriana's Avatar
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    This made me laugh, only because I have my handshake/hugs backwards. I was so nervous at an interview that I got with Best Buy that I hugged the guy before I left without thinking, lol. I didn't get that job but I hope the hug had nothing to do with it (maybe they were afraid I'd be hugging customers inappropriately? hehehe). Then, in social settings, I shake hands when people go to hug me or give me kiss. I gotta get my shit straight!

    I never even pay attention to the strength of handshakes, it's one of those things that seems irrelevant to me. I tend to have sweaty palms, so I'm constantly rubbing them on my pants to dry them in anticipation for potential handshakes, even though sweaty-ish handshakes don't bother me personally unless they're really WET. Otherwise handshakes are sort of easily forgotten for me.
    "Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get, but if you work really hard, and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you...amazing things will happen" --Conan O'Brien

  7. #27
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    I never remember hand-shakes or even think about them. Maybe that's because I only do it about once or twice a year, and if I'm shaking your hand, our meeting is probably formal enough to be completely insignificant to me beyond the context of the immediate circumstances. (It's not a normal part of my job or social life.)

    Out of the ten or twenty people I know, like, and love the best in my life, I highly doubt I've shaken hands with any of them.

    But, to be precisely on topic, a firm hand-shake from a woman seems completely normal to me and I wouldn't think anything of it. I wouldn't think anything of a weak hand-shake, either. I just kind of assume they only shook my hand out of formality, that they may be distracted, awkward, and that they know this is probably the only time they're ever going to see me, so they're making an effort to be polite and get on with their lives.

    The thing is that anybody can decide ahead of time how hard to squeeze for reasons of their own. Since you cannot read minds, it's a pretty insignificant thing, unless you're really desperate to be jumping to conclusions in order to solve an urgent problem. Anybody can decide to give a firm hand-shake, but that doesn't mean jack about how confident or trustworthy they are.

  8. #28
    Dali
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    I can't stand limp handshakes from either sex and I definitely can't stand bone-crusher hand-shakes from either sex too. The latter feel like the other person is attempting to establish dominance over you. I mean you might as well give me your hand palm down and shake my hand with your back turned to me.

  9. #29
    Dali
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    As a follow-on to the other post, in Kenya, we shake hands all the time. Men shake hands with other men and women and vice versa. It's a very common greeting and people would be highly offended should you refuse to shake their hand (Muslim women are excused from this). I was surprised to go to Malaysia and find that this was much less common. Oftentimes I'd proffer a hand and the other party would look on inquisitively for a (VERY long) two or so seconds before shaking my hand.

  10. #30
    Senior Member JivinJeffJones's Avatar
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    I've always thought girls/women give limp handshakes as a way of appearing more feminine. Japanese, Indonesian and Korean women especially give the limpest handshakes, which makes sense since those are cultures in which the women are expected to be (appear?) soft, weak and submissive. It irritates me a little, but mostly I write it off as a cultural difference. I like a woman's handshake to be firm enough that I don't feel that I'm inadvertently molesting/crushing their hand. On the whole Aussie women have very respectable handshakes.

    I went through a spell as a teenager where I was all about giving a slightly firmer handshake than I got, which sometimes got me into brief impromptu handshake competitions. I soon decided it was silly and insecure, so I settled on a pressure I felt was firm enough to be noticeable but not so firm that it became challenging. You think about these things as a teenager (or I did, at least), just as you think about what your signature should look like.

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