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  1. #21
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Are you curious about what other people think of you?

    Do you care one way or the other? (Why or why not?)

    Are their perceptions of you usually accurate?
    1 - Unfortunately yes. I don't want people to think i am a bad person.

    2 - Sometimes i have a 'Don't give a rats ass' approach to people, then other times i wonder if i have hurt their feelings by being blunt and honest. It would be easier to be one or the other.

    3 - Most people i know, know i am a good hearted person and i'll help anyone with anything if i have the resources/time available. People surprise me sometimes with their kind words. I suppose i am just to modest.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  2. #22

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    I'm very curious about how others perceive me. I've always tried to read how people are perceiving me. It just seems like a useful thing to know. It is not that I care what they think as much as I just want to know. And I'm terrible at guessing games.

  3. #23
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Are you curious about what other people think of you?
    Not really.

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Do you care one way or the other? (Why or why not?)
    No. I care about what I think of myself, that is most important to me. I hold myself to high standards, and when I don't meet them I get down on myself a little. I'm not there to put on airs and be fake to someone just to get their approval. I don't care that much.

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Are their perceptions of you usually accurate?
    Don't know what they perceive, so I can't say.

  4. #24
    Just a statistic rhinosaur's Avatar
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    Are you curious about what other people think of you?
    To some degree. I don't actively seek to find out attention, but if someone has an opinion about me, I'll listen. In the absence of volunteered information I just go about my business and do the best I can.

    Do you care one way or the other? (Why or why not?)
    Yes, I do care. If someone has a negative opinion of me, it hurts, and I see it as a flaw in my own behavior or character. If someone has a positive opinion of me, it feels good, and I want to continue doing whatever it was I did.

    Are their perceptions of you usually accurate?
    Yes, usually.

    I had a conversation with an ESTJ once who found it puzzling that I was even curious as to how others perceived me. I think most INFJs find that they are often misperceived but in very different ways. I think for me it does matter because I care to some extent what people think, although sometimes it is just a source of amusement.
    I think ESTJs are the kinds of people who would say "his/her opinion doesn't matter."

  5. #25
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    I do care about some peoples' perceptions of me. Our success and happiness depends greatly on the opinions of others.

    I find that I don't naturally present enough information about myself to project a true representation of who I am. First impressions end up being based on stereotypes, which are usually much more negative than what it should be.

    So I make an effort to be act as outgoing as possible when I meet new people. I try not to be so private. When it comes to the opposite sex, I find that I need to behave in a stalker-like manner (in my mind) to be perceived as even remotely interested by the other.

  6. #26
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Are you curious about what other people think of you?
    Yes. I'm always trying to find external homeostasis and I need feedback.

    Do you care one way or the other? (Why or why not?)
    I care what the opinions of people I care about are and I try to do impression management of those who have power over me. Like it or not, it matters what my boss thinks of me. It doesn't so much matter what Joe Blow on the street thinks of me.

    Are their perceptions of you usually accurate?
    Different groups of people see different aspects of my personality although there is a consistent thread of me throughout all these manifestations. I think that thread is accurate. The only majorly different perception of me is probably at work and I don't really care for them that much except for getting my work done and the hell outta there.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  7. #27
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    Are you curious about what other people think of you?

    Yes.

    Do you care one way or the other? (Why or why not?)

    Yes. The perception that others have of you effects your life, plain and simple.

    Are their perceptions of you usually accurate?

    I haven't exactly been counting. I'll say they hit and miss equally. But then, maybe I have no idea what I really am and can't judge this situation anyhow.
    Go to sleep, iguana.


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  8. #28
    The Duchess of Oddity Queen Kat's Avatar
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    Fortunately, most people don't know me at all. If they would know me, they'd take advantage of me and I don't wan that to happen!
    I was sitting outside the classroom waiting to go in, and I saw an airplane hit the tower. The TV was obviously on. I used to fly myself and I said, "There's one terrible pilot."
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  9. #29
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saint Kar View Post
    Fortunately, most people don't know me at all. If they would know me, they'd take advantage of me and I don't wan that to happen!
    I understand as i never truly let my guard down around most people.
    Some people will take advantage, you can't get away from that. You just have to hope that you've surrounded yourself with positive people so should some sick, twisted, selfish son of a gun take the piss out of you, those true friends will help pick you up and get you back to your feet.

    You have to believe that not everyone is out to take advantage of your good nature .. I keep telling myself this anyway.

    Anyway, i am sure you are a diamond in the rough .. You need those positive people to help you shine so you can show your true potential. Then take on the world.

    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  10. #30
    That chalkboard guy Matthew_Z's Avatar
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    Are you curious about what other people think of you?
    Do you care one way or the other? (Why or why not?)

    I have a natural curiosity of sorts. I generally enjoy comparing notes. This naturally includes notes about myself. However, comparing those notes always prove to be the most interesting due to differences in perception. I know my thoughts and these influence my actions. However, an inverse relationship with others; that is, my actions influence their thoughts of me. There eternally remains the intriguing possibility that I can use this second order to learn something about myself.

    I would say that I care about this perception. It's another tool in my arsenal of information. However, should this information be somehow useless,(based on inaccurate data, for instance) it follows that I wouldn't care about it. Therefore, to some degree I care, and to some degree I don't. I do not try to change myself simply based on what others think of me. If others think I have a problem and I agree with that assessment, I will attempt change. However, I generally resent "change" for the sake of giving others a false impression.
    If a deaf INFP falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

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