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Thread: Personal space

  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    No it doesn't have to do with personal space,
    but I look into people's eyes with a lot of intensity.
    Those who can't look me in the eye, I don't trust their sorry asses.
    I attribute it to severe low self esteem, or poor moral character. I wouldn't choose to be around either.

  2. #22
    Senior Member Liminality's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 01011010 View Post
    I attribute it to severe low self esteem, or poor moral character. I wouldn't choose to be around either.
    In my experience I'd say it's more related to insecurity or nervous tension, but generally of the people I know, I've not really noticed a correlation.

    I've old friends who were exceedingly low in the moral fibre and self esteem count and who were somewhat touchy feely and rather eye contactful.

    On the other hand I've a bubbly, morally shining, not that unconfidant friend who hardly looks me in the eye.

    Forgetting of course my poor people reading skills >_> <_<.

    Personally, regarding eye contact I vary depending on the person.

    Personal space wise, I'm pretty fond of being close, unless the person makes me feel rather anxious/low self esteemy...Okay maybe I'm majorly wrong with that first part...

    Ooh, if you know the enneagram, and stackings -instinctual variants; They're said to have a fair chunk of an impact on eye contact, sx firsts are real big on it.
    Come along Fool
    A direct hit of the senses you are disconnected
    It's not that it's bad, it's not that it's death
    It's just on the tip of your tongue, and you're so silent

  3. #23
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    I think it's impolite to look at a person straight in the eyes, especially when I don't know them too well. If that makes me sound weak - it's fine, but you have to keep in mind possible cultural differences before the final judgement.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  4. #24
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Liminality View Post
    Ooh, if you know the enneagram, and stackings -instinctual variants; They're said to have a fair chunk of an impact on eye contact, sx firsts are real big on it.
    Guilty as charged. I have SX first.

  5. #25
    Senior Member Liminality's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    Guilty as charged. I have SX first.
    Bawhawhaw, I knew it, you connectophiles may feign an air of interrogation, and justice, but we softies will be in the background when no one can stand up to the test, with shifty eyed cuddles and hot chocolate !
    Come along Fool
    A direct hit of the senses you are disconnected
    It's not that it's bad, it's not that it's death
    It's just on the tip of your tongue, and you're so silent

  6. #26
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ragingkatsuki View Post
    Hmm. Not an introvert/extrovert thing. I have an extremely extroverted friend who has quite a large personal space.
    It's more of a feeler/thinker thing. Feelers like to close in on people when they speak to them as well as touch them. Thinkers usually don't like that.
    Not a feeler thinker thing either, I have huge personal space issues, my brother bluetooths me hugs instead (he will open his arms at a distant and shout out bluetooth so I know what he means haha).

    I'm 32 and I've only just started to hug my friends, and I'm still struggling with the invasion that it feels like.

    I don't like anyone being too close in my face talking to me, whispering in my ear since that's breaking my personal circle that I have erected around me.

    I only do direct eye contact with people I trust, or in a direct confrontation because it's intimidating to others lol however no confrontation and no freindship with trust then forget it, I prefer not to allow you to look that deeply into me.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

    Berb's Johari Berb's Nohari

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    I think it's impolite to look at a person straight in the eyes, especially when I don't know them too well. If that makes me sound weak - it's fine, but you have to keep in mind possible cultural differences before the final judgement.
    Sure.

    Japan is big on not making direct eye contact as part of politeness. Then again, Japan is full of parasite singles/hikikomoris/grass eating men. I'd say their social/cultural system isn't working out for them. Especially, when a girl can get beaten up by her bf/husband in a crowded subway and everyone just looks away.

  8. #28
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    Mine is pretty large although I'm not as anal about it as I used to be.

    ^read that out of context now. haha
    -end of thread-

  9. #29
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Liminality View Post
    Bawhawhaw, I knew it, you connectophiles may feign an air of interrogation, and justice, but we softies will be in the background when no one can stand up to the test, with shifty eyed cuddles and hot chocolate !
    I like that term "connectophile."
    I was in a meeting with a fella in a conference room.
    He kept wiggling around in his seat as I spoke to him.
    Finally I burst out laughing and asked, " Do I make you nervous?"

    He said, "Has anyone ever told you that you look inside people, rather than at people? I feel like I am being . . ."

    "Do you have anything to hide?" I interrupted.
    "No," he said.
    "Then relax."

    I have this habit of deeply "scanning" people.
    It can make some people twitch.

  10. #30
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    I'm pretty space-sensitive, but it depends on the area. The rule is you need to be as far away from me as is possible. In crowded trains I can tolerate people being in "my" space - say, a couple inches away - for a short time, for example, but that must be the furthest they can be or irritation sets in. I loathe - LOATHE- when someone sits or stands next to me when they didn't need to be right next to anybody. I'm not sure why the territoriality is so strong.
    I have no problem with eye contact; I will use it to convey GTFO messages, for example. What's not to like?
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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