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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    I shall look into this memory repression a little more.

    I take accountability for my actions, i suppose with me when it comes to arguments/discusions with others. I don't put to much weight to it.
    Pissed off - discussion - conclusion - move on. Its a process. For me personally to have another person say "you said this, that and the other" I don't always remember as it was cleared up in the past. Its done now. It happened and i learnt from it. I don't understand why it needs to be dragged up again to prove some point.
    Can't please everyone.
    True.

    The problem I have (as an INTP) is that for people to communicate there must be a shared understanding, the base of this is a shared reality. When someone can't remember events that make up this reality then it is very disconcerting to me.

  2. #22
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    True.

    The problem I have (as an INTP) is that for people to communicate there must be a shared understanding, the base of this is a shared reality. When someone can't remember events that make up this reality then it is very disconcerting to me.
    No, i understand. If a discussion from 2 years previous is being brought up though, well so much has happened since then. I don't have the ability to retain all information.

    I have just been reading up on repressed memory and found this.
    (bearing in mind some of this goes back 23 odd years, thanks mum, lol)

    Memory can decay, and the longer a memory has been stored and not used, the less available it will be. As new information enters the memory, it may be harder to access other information and cognitive system seems to be less efficient.

    The encoding of the memory can be affected by how much attention is devoted to the message.

    As mentioned before, even if memories are repressed, it may not be intentional. Some people choose to deliberately forget some traumatic experience. Memories can be forgotten due to a weak neural connection that was formed during the time of the experience or the brain did not encode for the memory.

    Memory is a very complex mechanism, which is not always accurate. That is why it is difficult to rely on the words of different eye witnesses of the same crime. Usually, each different witness remembers something different. The mind is capable of repressing memory as well. The mind is able to subconsciously forget a certain event, usually traumatic events, as a defense mechanism. These repressed memories can be recovered; however, there is much controversy behind that. Many argue that recovered memories are not always accurate.

    It is for this reason, i am going to leave well alone. I don't want to plant ideas in my head and cause problems. I can't change what my mum told me, i personally wished she had never said anything at all but it's done now.
    I can't change what my mum went through with that horrible man. How could a little girl protect her mum.
    The argument i had with my mum, well we are friends now and that is all that matters.
    I am unable to get clarification from my ex so i am just going to come to the conclusion that he was very unhappy but it was up to him to do something about his unhappiness back then.

    Thank you for taking the time to respond to this. I do appreciate it.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  3. #23
    no clinkz 'til brooklyn Nocapszy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    The thing is, i have a great memory.
    Thoughts please.
    it's not you -- your mom's crazy.
    we fukin won boys

  4. #24
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nocap View Post
    it's not you -- your mom's crazy.
    Yeah, i know that. Thought she was ESTP .. now thinking ESFp.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  5. #25
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    I cant rember shit but I know what it felt like. With the things I remember tho only
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  6. #26
    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    Generally, I think it's hard not to not remember negative memories, because they tend to leave spikes in our memory, and unless a person experiences some kind of head trauma or brain damage, I think it's hard to forget.. Other times, time passes by, and we simply 'chunk' our memories by simplifying to details, and forget.

    Other people CAN forget bad memories by repressing it so well that they forget what happens by replacing those memories with something else. What I learned in a psyche/human development class- those who do resort to inhibiting those memories may start out to develop multiple personality disorders as a way to cope with their pain. It's not to say everyone who represses their emotions get this way.. And, I think it's really case by case for each person..

    Some people develop PTSD. Other people learn to cope/adapt (given the proper environment/care). Really depends.

  7. #27
    Senior Member sonata's Avatar
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    There aren't specific incidents that I can't remember once someone has mentioned them, but I don't know whether some of my childhood memories are real. I have clear pictures of them, but whenever I think of them, I have this feeling in the back of my head that I might have imagined or edited that memory, and I can't tell what really happened.

    I'm thinking this may be because at the time, whenever I shared certain events with anyone, I was called a liar.

  8. #28
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    No, I can't. Sometimes I wish I could. I seem to remember everything in at least a vague sense, though the specifics can frequently remain just out of reach, taunting me for a while before I can recall them.

    I can still recall various sentences from textbooks I read in 8th grade, tell you which online profile a sentence regarding a type came from, or tell you who said most famous quotes upon hearing the quote.

    I actually have a better memory than most people, but strangely it's more for long-term than short term. I may struggle to remember what happened yesterday or a week ago, but I'll clearly remember it once it's further in the past, strangely enough.

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