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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    People may tell me I'm good, but I never feel that I'm good enough.
    I can second that.

    Compliments make me feel awkward and I'd rather hear them and give them out in private. And nothing exuberant! Sincere and simple.

  2. #12
    Self sustaining supernova Zoom's Avatar
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    For strangers it wouldn't matter as much, as they don't know ye and whatnot... but from what I've noticed, most don't want to hear a general compliment from those close them as much as how they are unique in the giver's eyes. Specificity and personalizing (not in a fake manner) the compliment lends it the authenticity most people would like to hear, and it makes more of an impact when someone is really seeing something in you.

    "You're smart, man."

    vs.

    "That was an amazing paper you wrote - ye really have a way with words."

    This especially applies in romantic relationships - I don't want to hear I'm cute from a lover, but how amazing my ass is or how they love the play of my mucles along my back... etc. and so forth.

    For my own odd personal wants: I really like it when someone compliments me in areas I feel slightly insecure regarding - looks and social skills. I know the majority of "normal" roles for either of those don't fit me, so hearing that my differences are viewed as a positive sounds... wonderful, to say the least.

  3. #13
    Senior Member Tiltyred's Avatar
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    Hm. Well ... if it's complimenting something I had nothing to do with, like, "You have pretty eyes," then however and where ever it happens is fine. For some reason, if it's complimenting my efforts, though, I like that to be done in private and briefly. Then I carry it around with me like it's my secret treasure, and it makes me happy.

  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sky is BLUE! View Post
    I can second that.

    Compliments make me feel awkward and I'd rather hear them and give them out in private. And nothing exuberant! Sincere and low-key.
    Right on. I know exactly how you feel. Some compliment givers can be a bit much. There was this teacher at my high school that I didn't even have. She was really sweet and nice but she would stop me in the hall during passing period and tell me like almost every other day how "beautiful" I was (I consider myself to be average looking).

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pitseleh View Post
    Right on. I know exactly how you feel. Some compliment givers can be a bit much. There was this teacher at my high school that I didn't even have. She was really sweet and nice but she would stop me in the hall during passing period and tell me like almost every other day how "beautiful" I was (I consider myself to be average looking).
    Ahh, yes. The people who think that you look like you need encouragement because you seem down for some reason. I've met my share of those too.

  6. #16
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Note: these only apply if genuinly and spontaneously given. Nothing's worse than a fake, studied or forced compliment.
    In both cases:

    "Thanks for helping me out with this, I dunno how I would've done this without you"

    works brilliantly. I love helping people, and I love it even more when they show their appreciation and do not take it for granted.


    At work also:

    "Good job, you handled that perfectly."
    "Ah, that's great, thnx." (after i facilitated their work, or was thoughtful to them somehow)

    Social circle:

    "Life's never boring with you around."
    "I'm intrigued by you."
    "Great insight."

    and well..what girl doesn't like
    "I can't take my eyes off of you"

    or

    " I can't stop thinking about you"

    as long as stated genuinly and with the right amount of awe
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  7. #17
    Senior Member BlahBlahNounBlah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    I'm generally unmoved by compliments. Sometimes I think they might encourage me or boost my self-esteem, but they usually don't. (So I've been seeking long-term solutions.)

    People may tell me I'm good, but I never feel that I'm good enough.


    This. But I appreciate the intent.

  8. #18
    Once Was Synarch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    People may tell me I'm good, but I never feel that I'm good enough.
    Why wouldn't you be good enough? Good enough for what?
    "Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."

  9. #19
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    I don't give compliments just to make people feel good, i do it because i appreciate them. I don't expect anything in return and get rather surprised when i do.

    Different matter in the work place though.



    Quote Originally Posted by DisneyGeek View Post
    I really don't like it when people compliment me. Often I think that people do it out of pity for me or because they feel they have to. Just generally appreciating me works best.
    I do agree with that. Someone recently gave me a really nice compliment. I could see the feeling put into it and also the logic. But i didn't want the feelings. I did feel uncomfortable.

    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    People may tell me I'm good, but I never feel that I'm good enough.
    Totally.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  10. #20
    Senior Member Nillerz's Avatar
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    If someone tells me I'm good looking or charasmatic I am like "omg!" but if someone says I'm smart I usually pass it up because I'm used to hearing that one alot.

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