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  1. #141
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Feops View Post
    Asking a woman to dance? Does that work?
    I've seen it work...

    From what I've seen only the most aggressive guys will succeed in such an environment. In a loud place with tons of people around it's more physical actions than verbal actions that get you noticed. They're going to beeline for the women dressing/acting most receptive, and they're going to err on the side of being too assertive rather than being too passive, because it's more successful.

    Ethics aside, these guys occasionally get some interest in return, while the passive guys get nothing. Results talk!
    I guess if you go to the club to pick up. I prefer to pick up in my hobby and friend groups; more likely they'll be my kind of crazy instead of some other kind of crazy.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

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    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  2. #142
    Senior Member Feops's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EffEmDoubleyou View Post
    I can't dispute your theory. I just despair that it appears to be such a no-brainer that getting some cheap ass is the value held highest over all others.
    Hmm. It's a no-brainer that humans want to hook up? Could you clarify?

  3. #143

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    Quote Originally Posted by Feops View Post
    Hmm. It's a no-brainer that humans want to hook up? Could you clarify?
    Well, that IS a no-brainer. Hell, I like to hook up, too.

    But I was referring to the fact that it appears to be a no-brainer that people want to hook up at the expense of everything else...character, respect, etc. As if they're thinking, "Well, I don't WANT to put my skeezy hands all over this girl, but I gots to get me my hookup, so that's the way it's going to have to be." It's kind of depressing.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

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    /Nohari

  4. #144
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Feops View Post
    Asking a woman to dance? Does that work?
    Each person is an individual, there is no formula that "works". But I have danced with almost every man that has taken the time (and courage) to ask me. But those have been few and far between, unfortunately.

    I had a 12 year old boy with such manners ask me to dance once (at an outside carnival). I know he'll make a good partner to someone some day.

  5. #145
    Senior Member Feops's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EffEmDoubleyou View Post
    But I was referring to the fact that it appears to be a no-brainer that people want to hook up at the expense of everything else...character, respect, etc. As if they're thinking, "Well, I don't WANT to put my skeezy hands all over this girl, but I gots to get me my hookup, so that's the way it's going to have to be." It's kind of depressing.
    Interesting. I've erased and rewrote my response to this several times now, sometimes from different perspectives entirely. This is something I think about a lot. Give me an hour or two to settle my thoughts.

    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    Each person is an individual, there is no formula that "works". But I have danced with almost every man that has taken the time (and courage) to ask me. But those have been few and far between, unfortunately.
    Why do you think that the requests have been few and far between?

  6. #146
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Admittedly, I'm not going to a club to hook up. Ever. Like runvardh says, I'm going to find someone to date in my circle of friends or someone that shares an interest. I'm more likely to date someone from these boards than someone that would approach me at a club. In fact, if you grope me, you've guaranteed that I now think of you as a disgusting d-bag. If you ask me to dance, you have a much better chance. You're showing respect for me. I don't need an alpha male, thanks.
    Something Witty

  7. #147
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Hmmm. I might look around the room when I'm with friends, but most of the time I'm just people-watching from the safety of my friend-cocoon. And a lot of the time, if I touch my hair, it's to get it out of my face, or because I'm hot. I'm not saying there aren't some signals that are sent out purposely, but I wouldn't put a lot of stock in subconscious body language. There are a lot of different things they could mean.
    Off course there's different ways to do things, touching your hair isn't necessarily a sign of availability, but it is sometimes a strong indicator depending on how you do it. Trust me on this one, when you are good at, and take time to notice people's body language it's sometimes a lot easier to see their intentions.

    Quote Originally Posted by Feops View Post
    Asking a woman to dance? Does that work?

    From what I've seen only the most aggressive guys will succeed in such an environment. In a loud place with tons of people around it's more physical actions than verbal actions that get you noticed. They're going to beeline for the women dressing/acting most receptive, and they're going to err on the side of being too assertive rather than being too passive, because it's more successful.

    Ethics aside, these guys occasionally get some interest in return, while the passive guys get nothing. Results talk!
    I beg to differ. Being aggressive is a whole different league from being assertive. Aggressive is tactless and rude, while assertive is merely taking control. The line is not as thin as you might think, but obviously there are still a lot of guys who don't see it (groping, harassing etc.).

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Admittedly, I'm not going to a club to hook up. Ever. Like runvardh says, I'm going to find someone to date in my circle of friends or someone that shares an interest. I'm more likely to date someone from these boards than someone that would approach me at a club. In fact, if you grope me, you've guaranteed that I now think of you as a disgusting d-bag. If you ask me to dance, you have a much better chance. You're showing respect for me. I don't need an alpha male, thanks.
    May I direct your attention to the part of my post above your quote, about the difference in aggressive and assertive! There's a difference between an Alpha male and a jerk mind you. I think most girls would love to date or even have a one night stand with an Alpha male, a guy who takes control of the situation, as long as he isn't just brutally invading your space, and pull you out of your comfort zone in any way. Am I wrong?

  8. #148
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Feops View Post

    Why do you think that the requests have been few and far between?
    Because the general consensus with men today is that they will be seen as old fashioned and that politeness is wack. They'd rather shove their junk in my back. I blame music videos.

    (ok, I don't actually blame the videos - but the acceptance of this sort of culture is everywhere)

  9. #149
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    (ok, I don't actually blame the videos - but the acceptance of this sort of culture is everywhere)
    Ladies, please don't get mad because of my next statement, but I actually like this culture, it leaves me to be to be the night in shining armour. Prince charming, etc.

    Hell, last time I got 'bonus points' for not even insinuating anything sexual when I first met a girl. It actually hadn't even crossed my mind to do that when I met the girl. On the other hand, on the first planned date when I asked if I could kiss her, she said she already wanted to kiss me before but was too shy to ask, and loved me for taking control of that situation. I felt so proud for doing that the right way.

  10. #150
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    you should reap the benefits! why not?

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