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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Costrin View Post
    You're just screwed, sorry.

    You're being chases by a herd of wild platypi.
    Perfect opportunity to test out that cursed sengai sword.

    You repeat the 2nd grade seven times until they kick you out of the school system.

  2. #22
    Senior Member plaguerat's Avatar
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    You can write your name faster than anyone you know- the perfect oportunity for showing off your autograph skills to some big shot talent agent.

    You find a delicious hunk of cheese hidden in the back of the fridge and no one has claimed it. You take a bite only to discover that it wasn't cheese at all- it was your mother's breast milk fermenting because she forgot it was in there.
    VI VERI VENIVERSUM VIVUS VIVCI
    "By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe."

  3. #23
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by plaguerat View Post
    You can write your name faster than anyone you know- the perfect oportunity for showing off your autograph skills to some big shot talent agent.

    You find a delicious hunk of cheese hidden in the back of the fridge and no one has claimed it. You take a bite only to discover that it wasn't cheese at all- it was your mother's breast milk fermenting because she forgot it was in there.
    That situation needs no silver lining.

    You get teleported into TV Land! Yay! But wait! You're stuck forever in Teletubbies!
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
    - Costrin

  4. #24
    Senior Member plaguerat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Costrin View Post
    That situation needs no silver lining.

    You get teleported into TV Land! Yay! But wait! You're stuck forever in Teletubbies!
    You get to feel like a spaceman (or woman) when you sleep because of those tin-foil blankets.


    You have one hand because of a horrific and terribly scarring motorcycle accidnet. You spend years recovering in therapy, and now you can finally cope with the fact that you've got to do everything one-handed from now on.
    One day you innocently scratch your ass whilst making eggs. And then you realize...your nose itches as well.
    VI VERI VENIVERSUM VIVUS VIVCI
    "By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe."

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by plaguerat View Post
    You get to feel like a spaceman (or woman) when you sleep because of those tin-foil blankets.


    You have one hand because of a horrific and terribly scarring motorcycle accidnet. You spend years recovering in therapy, and now you can finally cope with the fact that you've got to do everything one-handed from now on.
    One day you innocently scratch your ass whilst making eggs. And then you realize...your nose itches as well.
    This is a perfect opportunity to cut your nose off. It was too big anyway! You won't have to smell your itchy ass anymore. Then you get back to the fine pleasures of itchin and going deep into the crack. Smear your hand on the eggs for extra seasoning.

    You are eaten by a blue whale and his stomach is full of sharks!

  6. #26

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    Quote Originally Posted by lemons View Post
    You are eaten by a blue whale and his stomach is full of sharks!
    You finally get to visit Japan.

    You are left naked on the main street of your home town, you have a small dick.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    You finally get to visit Japan.

    You are left naked on the main street of your home town, you have a small dick.
    At least I'm not right naked! I'm able to sneak home along the left sidewalk so nobody sees my small pen is showing. The store windows are blocked by signs and merchandise. When I get home I make a cup of hot cider to prepare for some penis weight lifting.

    You just found out everyone is a wizard except for you.

  8. #28

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    Quote Originally Posted by lemons View Post
    You just found out everyone is a wizard except for you.
    You swear never to play another rpg with your friends again. You leave and join a street gang. Later you record a rap album and become a multi millionaire.


    You are in a coma after a serious car accident.

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    You swear never to play another rpg with your friends again. You leave and join a street gang. Later you record a rap album and become a multi millionaire.


    You are in a coma after a serious car accident.
    Yay! No more car accidents.

    It's time to go to sleep. Problem is, you're not goin to sleep. You're ready to awaken your spirit! by thus ruining your chance at consciously attending a life-changing meeting at work in the morning. I guess you have to sleep through the meeting and be the last to get picked for the upcoming project board of masterships. You suck! You later find out you didn't actually awaken your spirit but got really drunk and forgot about it.

  10. #30
    Order Now! pure_mercury's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lemons View Post
    Yay! No more car accidents.

    It's time to go to sleep. Problem is, you're not goin to sleep. You're ready to awaken your spirit! by thus ruining your chance at consciously attending a life-changing meeting at work in the morning. I guess you have to sleep through the meeting and be the last to get picked for the upcoming project board of masterships. You suck! You later find out you didn't actually awaken your spirit but got really drunk and forgot about it.

    Positive: Your spirit also got drunk, and you got it into bed.


    Problem: You vomited all over a girl outside a bar.
    Who wants to try a bottle of merc's "Extroversion Olive Oil?"

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