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  1. #1
    Senior Member lowtech redneck's Avatar
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    Default Diffrent religious personalities

    This thread is intended as an irreverent but not mean-spirited joke; if it is percieved differently by any anonymous member of the forum, I would have no objections if the madmins moved it to the Graveyard.

    Here are what I view as typical examples of adherents to specific religions:

    Buddhism: "I want to die so that the unbearable pain that is my existence will end, but I'm deathly afraid that I'll continue to exist, anyway...hope this works!"

    Lavey Satanism: "I'm basically an objectivist with a strong hedonist streak who gets off on scaring religious old ladies through bullshit symbols and rituals."

    Scientology: "I am either a) batshit insane, or b) fucking bughouse nuts."

    Wicca: "I really really like Dungeons and Dragons and/or Mercedes Lackey novels."

    Let's hear from some others.

  2. #2
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Scientology: "I am either a) batshit insane, or b) fucking bughouse nuts."
    xD!

    Catholic: "I wonder how many hail mary's I'm getting for this."

  3. #3
    I'm a star. Kangirl's Avatar
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    Jehovah's Witness: "I allow myself no pleasure in life at all. I am better than you."

    (I mean this lightheartedly! one of my best friends became a JW after highschool and it causes some friction between us...)
    "Only an irrational dumbass, would burn Jews." - Jaguar

    "please give concise answers in plain English" - request from Provoker

  4. #4
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    I think Judaism can best be summed up as "OH GOD WHY???"
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  5. #5
    See Right Through Me Bubbles's Avatar
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    Default

    Got one.

    Catholic: Because the Church SAYS SO.
    4w3, IEI, so/sx/sp, female, and Cancer sign.

    My thoughts on...
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    DISCLAIMER: If I offend you, I'm 99.9% sure it's unintentional. So be sure to let me know, m'kay? (And yes, an INFP would stick this in their signature, lol.)

  6. #6
    I'm a star. Kangirl's Avatar
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    Funny quote:

    Jewish logic: ‘If P, so why not Q?”

    Gentile ethics entail “ought implies can,” while in Jewish ethics “can implies don’t.”



    (quote, mangled by me, is Sidney Morgenbesser)
    "Only an irrational dumbass, would burn Jews." - Jaguar

    "please give concise answers in plain English" - request from Provoker

  7. #7

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    Oddly, this works for both Catholics and Jews:

    "I'm not quite sure what just happened there, but I'm pretty sure it's my fault."
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  8. #8
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Pastafarian: "You can't take my pirate regalia away! It's an expression of my faith!"
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  9. #9
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    SOUTHERN BAPTIST:
    If you dance or drink alcohol you're gonna' burn in HELL!!!


  10. #10
    Charting a course
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    SOUTHERN BAPTIST:
    If you dance or drink alcohol you're gonna' burn in HELL!!!

    You forgot the second part.

    "Just let me finish my six-pack, then I'll meet you at the titty-bar at nine."



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