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  1. #171
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    You can only "touch" someone who is free. If they don't choose to be with you, it's just you loving yourself through them. They might as well be a toy or a brick or a frog or some other mindless object.

    Perhaps that's good enough for awhile, but usually life just becomes lonelier and emptier and more boring... Solipsistic.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  2. #172
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ptgatsby View Post
    I would point out there are a lot of cultures that are built upon duty... Japan recently had a study about how many marriages are "sexless" and so forth - a relationship more like brother and sister... So there is a wide variety of issues.
    That's true. I was only tossing out examples. (I'm an ENFP, I don't care about being precise. )

    Regardless, I do agree with you. When in the relationship, Sona will want more than just power. The likely outcome is a constant attempt to force love, which won't emerge, which will cause... more force!
    Yep, he'll never be satisified.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  3. #173
    Senior Member Sahara's Avatar
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    Well I think it's just plain wrong, so there
    "No one can be free of the chains that surround them"

  4. #174

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sona View Post
    [] I am going to stop drinking, and I'll not be committing fornication once am married.
    Good for you. Just keep going in the right direction.

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
    Robot Fusion
    "As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance." John Wheeler
    "[A] scientist looking at nonscientific problems is just as dumb as the next guy." Richard Feynman
    "[P]etabytes of [] data is not the same thing as understanding emergent mechanisms and structures." Jim Crutchfield

  5. #175
    heart on fire
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sona View Post
    Yes I do know what you're trying to say. I.e. Am using religion in a calculated way to get kick-backs for myself.

    Well the way I see it, is. Why should a believing man who believes in Allah get all this pleasure from his wife. His going to use the same tools as me to take advantage of his wife, and shes not going to complain as she will be doing her duty. Am just there to get the pleasure.

    Its like this... If I was a drug dealer - and I could sell drugs even though knowing the damage it creates. As opposed to a drug dealer who doesn't have a clue. I'd still sell the drugs... You know why... If they don't buy the stuff from me they will buy it from someone else.

    Its my right for me wife to act how I want her to or how I want to use her. She's my wife. I don't go up to other men and tell them they should treat their wives in a set way, I don't have the authority. If I can use a piece of scripture to get laid when I want then sure as hell I will use it. Whats so wrong about that?
    Wow, it is like you took the "Submision to God" thing out of your religion and replaced it with 'Submission to the Male Id."

    Good luck on getting a woman to agree to it and still respect you in the morning. Isn't devotion and faithfulness to Islam part of what women respect in their men within Islam?

  6. #176
    Tenured roisterer SolitaryWalker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lateralus View Post
    It matters to everyone. You're just supressing those feelings. It doesn't have to necessarily be about love, either. It could be respect or admiration. When someone is with you because they're being controlled, there is no love or respect.
    Oh no..its the Intuition he is supressing. You need to think in the abstract a bit to understand what love is. He put it perfectly--he cant understand it because its not tangible. And if he cant understand it what good is it, even if its there?


    Sensors need to make extra sure that they really are trying to understand things for their essence, not just their appearance.
    "Do not argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." -- Mark Twain

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    My blog: www.randommeanderings123.blogspot.com/

  7. #177
    Tenured roisterer SolitaryWalker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    How on earth can you exploit someone by contributing to them and playing by the established rules that have been laid down for the group? That seems silly to me. If you play by the rules (i.e., do not disrupt the organization) as a kindness, and you contribute to others again as a kindness, how on earth can you consider it to be exploitation?

    The only difference is belief... and belief is not black/white, it's a continuum. At what point (aside from their own admission) can you lump someone in a non-belief category versus the belief category? Even the believers don't believe it all; and the unbelievers often still believe some of it, partially. Which is why they're still there.



    Now, admittedly, you are losing me.

    To return to the beginning, I suggested that it was a good thing to contribute positively to others even if you don't necessarily believe everything that is being sold, and it's a bad thing to take purposefully take advantage of others (like a scavenger) even if you don't believe. Perhaps I worded myself poorly earlier.



    You should qualify that comment. It's far too strong.



    So you're saying Islam promotes as "moral behavior" the exploitation of others within the system in regards to behaving one way outwardly to gain face and then behaving however one wants when one is alone? That's part of the actual tenets of the faith?

    The difference between Sona and a conventional religious person is that the former is exploiting the system and the latter is being exploited by the system.
    Last edited by SolitaryWalker; 08-24-2007 at 09:30 PM.
    "Do not argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." -- Mark Twain

    “No man but a blockhead ever wrote, except for money.”---Samuel Johnson

    My blog: www.randommeanderings123.blogspot.com/

  8. #178
    Senior Member niffer's Avatar
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    Soo...

    Any updates on the current situation at home, Sona?
    sparkly sparkly rainbow excretions

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    holy shit am I a feeler?
    if you like my avatar, it's because i took it myself! : D

  9. #179
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    Quote Originally Posted by niffer View Post
    Soo...

    Any updates on the current situation at home, Sona?
    Yes. Now that my moms backs my SIL is acting normal and un-bitchy like.

  10. #180
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    Wow, it is like you took the "Submision to God" thing out of your religion and replaced it with 'Submission to the Male Id."

    Good luck on getting a woman to agree to it and still respect you in the morning. Isn't devotion and faithfulness to Islam part of what women respect in their men within Islam?
    Not to men. To me. A wife must give her submission to her husband first and then god. You really don't understand Muslim women... You would really be surprised how respectful and submissive they can be to their husbands. A good pious religious Muslim wife can change a mans life completely.

    Here is a poem you should read:
    MuftiSays Community :: View topic - The Pious Wife

    Here read this article on the correct etiquette of a pious Muslim wife:
    Islamic Wife (Muslim Bride) in the light of Holy Qur'an and Ahadees (Prophetic traditions)

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