I just wanted to know how many of you have actually made it home, to a place that isn't just a house, a roof over your head, but your actual home. The place you come back to with joy, the place that makes you feel comfortable and content when you reach it, secure in the knowledge that you are in your castle safe and sound.
I have moved around a fair amount since I was a teenageer, all in all I have moved 25 times, 23 of those were moves from the age of 13, the other 2 were pre teen.
None of them were home, none of them had the feel of a home, they were just places I stayed, even when my name was on the tenancy agreement, they were still just a stop by gap filler until the next place.
Now I am supposedly settled, in what should be my home, yet it still doesn't feel right. The thought of staying here for years on end makes me feel mightily unhappy.
It's a nice house as houses go, but it is just a house.
I get flighty, I get itchy feet and I get pretty depressed after a few years in one place. I'm not at that stage yet, only been here for half a year so far but I know it will come because I am already dreaming of something different.
I even move my furniture around all the time to at least give me the semblence of change.
Are you home or do your roots never take either?
You remind me of me. I'm 24 and I've moved 18 times already. I either stop feeling comfortable where I am, or something happens which forces me to move. In most cases, however, I've not really felt 'at home'. More like a visitor overstaying a very long welcome. I'm adaptable and seem to take to being anywhere, but after a while, like you, I get restless. Something is off, or not right-- and there have been plenty of instances where I feel like I've almost got it, that feeling 'yes, this is home'- but it's not quite there.
I had never thought about the number of places homes I've physically lived but I rattled off a count and it is at least 20 but possibly more. I moved about 15 times with my parents (maybe 6 or more different regions). Since I have moved out, I have moved 5 times but this was all within the same region. can't say I'm really attached to the places I've lived at or seeking out such a place. despite this, I find this a particularly interesting question. there is a strong part of me that simply wants to own less stuff so it is easier to move around -- to be practical (practical because I am expecting to move around a whole bunch more..). the idea of settling down seems far off into the future. I haven't had a problem moving around within the same region. I am afraid to move to a new region where I wouldn't know anyone and would have to start meeting many new people/friends somehow.. although I view this as the next logical step once I finish college.
I moved a bit as an adult, shifting between various rental properties. I started out in group houses then moved in with my partner. Most places felt like home after a few months. My current place feels most like home because it's the first place we've ever owned. We no longer have the possibility hanging over of us of the landlord selling the place or wanting to move in. I like the feeling of permanence, and it will feel more permanent once we've paid off the mortgage.
The suburb that we live in helps too. We know a bunch of people who live nearby, and even though we don't see them very often, it makes the place feel more, I dunno, like a community or something.
It sounds like a handful of INFPs I've known, BerberElla. One had "everything" and left it all behind. A log cabin home in the woods, family, money. Died on the streets. Never held still a day after he left.
I love to travel and I love to come home.
The first fifteen years I was married we moved twelve times. Now I have lived in the same home for thirty-two years.
I have lived away from home several times since we moved here but this truly does feel like my spot. Part of what made it "mine" was a commitment to hold still and make it so.
I am willing, and would like, to move to Mexico when my husband retires and when our mothers are gone. But circumstances will dictate that, I think.
Now I'll say something so corny that you can all stick your tongues out at me. You know in "The Wizard of Oz" when Dorothy says something about looking for something when all the time it was right in her own backyard?
That restlessness, I think, is a search for Self. Once you've got it, home is in your heart wherever you are.
"No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer