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  1. #11
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    Not at all, it's just another topic and seems to have enough momentum for its own thread.

    Edit: I should say you didn't offend me, but I can't speak for everyone. Anyway, I thought it would make a cool thread on its own and was beginning to derail the girl thread a bit.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  2. #12
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    Did I offend someone? o_O
    Certainly not me. I completely agree.

    Now, I'm kind of mixed on this. I don't really care to have my own kids, but there is an obvious philosophy about letting our genes carry on. To me, though, this is just basic programming... it's with us because without it, we wouldn't be here.

    But I've taken a rational approach to the present world, and deduced that having my own kids will reduce my own happiness and not increase someone else's... a complete loss. I'd rather take a child away from a negative situation and try to improve it, then gain the satisfaction of both helping and guiding. Having a child is simply less efficient and once I identified the real impulse involved, I took it on it's own merit... how happy will it make me? Not very, relative to the work I'm going to go through.

    I say this knowing full well that if I had a kid, I'd love it unconditionally and without resentment, just I have done with each pet I had "donated" to me... it's not something I think is optimal, but certainly no fault of theirs (and I might as well maximise my enjoyment of it!)

    My wife and I have talked about it for several years, and that is more or less the conclusion we have. If we adopt kid(s), it'll be once we are established, probably getting closer to semi-retirement (that would be I'd be hitting about 40-ish, on current projections). That way we won't feel that having a child in our life is a serious drag on our plans to travel, her to start her own business/go into politics and so forth. It's not too old, either, especially if you adopt at several years. So it works for us.

    I feel I need to note that my viewpoint is a subjective valuation on what I want. No one should take it to mean I disagree with their choices. This is what I want, and can easily see why others would want it differently. Ok, not easily, heh... but I understand why others would want it.

  3. #13
    Nerd King Usurper Edgar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    But seriously, what's the appeal of having one's own children?



    If I ever want kids, I'm adopting.
    Why in the world would you want to spend your time and resources raising someone else child, just so he/she can group and yell "YOU ARE NOT MY MOTHER!" during every heated argument?

  4. #14
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Why in the world would you want to spend your time and resources raising someone else child, just so he/she can group and yell "YOU ARE NOT MY MOTHER!" during every heated argument?
    News flash, they do that even if they are your child.
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  5. #15
    Wild Card Atomic Fiend's Avatar
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    Another thread about asexuality? By an INTJ?

    How novel.

  6. #16
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silently Honest View Post
    Another thread about asexuality? By an INTJ?

    How novel.
    This thread isn't about sex.

    I approve of sex. There are these things called contraceptives now, you know.
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  7. #17
    Nerd King Usurper Edgar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    This thread isn't about sex.

    I approve of sex. There are these things called contraceptives now, you know.


    It's a male myth about feminists that we hate sex. It can be a natural, zesty enterprise.

  8. #18
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    I'm not offended. Not everyone has to or should reproduce.

  9. #19
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    I changed the thread title to better reflect Haphazard's original question. I'ma stop messing with it now.

    Anyway. I always knew I wanted to raise a family, but the decision of whether to reproduce or adopt was kind of made for me by my first child. After my experience with her, I realized that the biological experience of bonding through birth and nursing and stuff like that wasn't something I could be sure I could recreate with an adopted child. The potential for screwing up a kid that way was too high for me to want to try. I realize this isn't flattering but it's the truth.

    We didn't want our daughter to be an only child and we wanted to have more kids, though, so we decided to stop after one more. We simply replaced ourselves, ZPG-wise.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  10. #20
    Wild Card Atomic Fiend's Avatar
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    I think the idea of parts of me running around after I'm gone is quite appealing, in all honesty. Sort of like the series finale of Dragonball GT with Goku Jr. and Vegeta Jr.

    Except without the super powers.

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