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Thread: Constructive rants on products

  1. #11
    Resident Snot-Nose Array GZA's Avatar
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    Aug 2007


    Yah, to the rat-bastards at Volcom:

    If you're going to charge me $50 for a pair of shorts, put a little extra time into making sure they don't suck. The shorts are, for the most part, perfectly fine, except the pockets. A well made pocket is designed so that when one sits down, the contents do not slide out. Even your every day, crappy, cheap ass shorts from Wal Mart are made to avoid this -it's just common sense. Yet every time I sit up in these shorts, I see whatever change was in my pocket is now on the chair. I've probably lost a few bucks because of this (cause we Canadians have $1 and $2 coins). Why the hell don't these shorts have good pockets if we're being charged that much? It's not like the Queen herself sewed it with the finest of silks; it's made in China out of a cotton-polyester blend! For $50, make good pockets, you cheap swine!

    And Volcom is a super popular brand among people my age, so I can't imagine how much other cheap shit they make that they charge mucho denero for by charging unspeakable sums of money. Like really, how could these shorts possible cost $50. Do they provide healthcare to the child-workers in their Chinese sweatshops? They probably make 50 cents an hour, so unless it takes them 100 hours to make those shorts, they should be dirt cheap.

    In fact, while I'm at it, all of these surfer/skater/california brands can go to hell. Volcom is probably one of the best and most legitimate of all these brands, but I'm still pissed about my shorts, so they're in. I'm tired of all this American Eagle/Hollister bullshit, in Canada. All the companies that advertise this whole "so-cal, surfing, laid back lifestyle" or whatever, suck, especially when they are not in california. It's just such a joke to walk into a store full of advertising that shoves california and surfing down your throat, when if you look out the window you realize it's febuary and there's three feet of snow and you're in a different country on the opposite end of the continent and this whole idealization of whatever california is is a complete, contrived joke. Some people actually love waking up to a bed of snow, and are tired of your dumb fantasy of sunny beaches, palm trees, and surfer-dudes. I'd much rather whip snowballs at your car. It's not just the surfer/cali ones that suck, any of the "lifestyle" brands can be applied to this, just replace "surfer" with prep-school student/athlete/nerd or whatever social stereotype pleases you most. They all fall way out of their element when they are marketed and sold here (or anywhere, for that matter, since they are all completely forced attempts at being some kind of one dimensional typecast... they're just even more out of place here). Maybe this isn't constructive, maybe it doesn't help them improve their products, but they should GTFO.

  2. #12
    On a mission Array Usehername's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    I always buy men's bikes - I just assume they are better.
    You must enlighten me sometime.
    While women's bikes aren't always the better choice for any individual woman, it's always worth test-riding one of them. IF you're short and/or contain most of your height in your legs as opposed to above your waist, you just might fit a women's bike better.
    (If you find a male the same height as you, chances are he's going to be more upper-body and you're going to be more leggy.) The distance between your seat (saddle) and your bars is less for females (we can't reach as far with less upper body height), but not at the expense of standover height. There is different geometry involved to accomodate the different body proportions.

    Quote Originally Posted by Martoon View Post
    The only difference I was aware of between men's and women's bikes is that men's bikes are designed to irreversibly alter the men riding them, should they become dismounted from the seat in a sudden and unfortunate way, while women's bikes don't carry this feature.
    This used to be true. Now, you'll find essentially all top tubes slope and it's not a gender-guide anymore (though it doesn't slope as dramatically as the ones you're thinking of). Additionally, there are often closer brake levers (females have smaller hands to grab the brakes), the width of handlebar is usually narrower on a women's specific bike, and sometimes it comes with a women's specific saddle (seat).

    Women's pelvises are considerably wider for childbirth reasons, and you really don't want to be bearing your body weight on anything but bone. (Single most important reason why females likely don't enjoy bike riding--they are bearing body weight on soft tissue!) I recommend Specialized for women's specific saddles. I ride on 155mm width; most males ride 130mm. Specialized (um, this is a brand) dealers will have a little thing to sit on unofficially called the "assometer" which leaves imprints next to a ruler and tells you how far apart your "sit bones" are. You want to sit on these bones, or you will hate riding.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  3. #13
    perdu fleur par bologne Array Martoon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007


    Quote Originally Posted by GZA View Post
    Yet every time I sit up in these shorts, I see whatever change was in my pocket is now on the chair.
    Every pair of dress pants does that, regardless of brand, design, or quality. But this is consistent with their purpose; to be as uncomfortable, inconvenient, and mobility restrictive as possible.

    I hereby restate my affection for cotton.
    I'm not a procrastinator. I'm a long-term planner.

  4. #14


    Quote Originally Posted by Gish View Post
    You know, I almost typed about a thousand things here, but they will all get me banned.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.


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