When do ISTPs share their deeper emotions?

[millerm277]

Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley

Even with someone you really trust and are close to?

Except under certain circumstances (Highly stressed, something bad happened, etc.), no.

Btw, changed the title from "do" to "when." I didn't want to assume anyone avoided emotions entirely.

It's not that I'm avoiding them, I just address them internally, and prefer to keep them to myself.

Originally Posted by "?"

oh yea did I mention that Myers-Briggs, Keirsey and other theorists say that STPs are the types that are most prone to the belief that talk is cheap and that action speaks louder than words?

Yup, I tend to believe that.

[Lithium]

last time i did i heavily regret.

I was alone with an Istp that i've had a huge crush on for ages, and just spilled everything... she did a lot too. we were both wated... despite there being some connection we haven't said a lot to each other since. I won't be doing that again.

[alicia91]

I tend to directly share the consequences of my emotions rather than the emotions themselves but I will sometimes share my real feelings with my husband. I have no idea why I'm like this but part of it might be that I believe that feelings are very temporary and in my case they can quickly change, and I don't want them coming back to haunt me next time I talk to the person I shared them with.

[Lauren Ashley]

Originally Posted by Lithium

last time i did i heavily regret.

I was alone with an Istp that i've had a huge crush on for ages, and just spilled everything... she did a lot too. we were both wated... despite there being some connection we haven't said a lot to each other since. I won't be doing that again.

Why did you regret it? Because you weren't sure how she reacted to it?

[Grayscale]

Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley

What would you like to be called?

machete.

[rhinosaur]

Originally Posted by alicia91

I tend to directly share the consequences of my emotions rather than the emotions themselves but I will sometimes share my real feelings with my husband. I have no idea why I'm like this but part of it might be that I believe that feelings are very temporary and in my case they can quickly change, and I don't want them coming back to haunt me next time I talk to the person I shared them with.

Yes. Sometimes, if I'm angry or hurt, I will keep my mouth shut, because I realize that the reason I feel the way I do might be immature or irrational, and I might not feel the same way once I think things over.

[yukino2002]

Originally Posted by Randomnity

I talk about my emotions only with the right people and more importantly, in the right circumstances. Privacy is a big factor. Time/ability to talk in depth. Generally it has to fit into the conversation somehow, so I'm not just blurting out random stuff. Otherwise, something has to be fairly upsetting for me to bring it up.

I'll also talk about different emotions with different people, of course.

I think I'm very much like you. I actually talk to people about feelings a lot more now that I'm in my mid-twenties. But it's always people that I feel incredibly comfortable with and trust and most of the time, I only care to share one piece of information once or maybe twice.

[lauranna]

Really i would say i very rarely let people in. Almost never. My closest friends are T's which is probably why i like them. I feel comfortable that they won't ask me anything personal.
The only time i have shared emotions is under extreme stress and with a very close friend. And then not entirely. and more to discuss the emotions that i might be feeling and what to do about them rather than the emotion itself.
I broke down once when i was stressed and a close friend said something that just tipped me over the edge. I cried randomly in a very public place. The feeling of letting it out was so scary and alien to me i literally ran away to be alone and pull myself together. I definitely do not feel at all comfortable being so vulnerable as that and not being in control.

[yugyug]

Originally Posted by rhinosaur

Sometimes, if I'm angry or hurt, I will keep my mouth shut, because I realize that the reason I feel the way I do might be immature or irrational, and I might not feel the same way once I think things over.

This is exactly why I keep my mouth shut in such circumstances, too. I don't recall a time when I regretted that decision.

Originally Posted by lauranna

Really i would say i very rarely let people in. Almost never. My closest friends are T's which is probably why i like them. I feel comfortable that they won't ask me anything personal.

* nods *

Problem is when I actually do want to talk about something that is stirring up emotions for me (and decide the timing & person is right), I'm so unpracticed at it that it comes out all wrong, which aggravates me and makes me just want to clam up/give up. And, if there's even the slightest hint that the listener is burdened, annoyed, or bothered by the small amount of revealing I attempt to do, I stop talking and think twice before I open up to that particular one again. Once I've tried several times (because they are a spouse or family member) and felt I had to pull the emotions back in, it is pretty much a long-term or permanent wall I erect between us. I'll listen to them, but won't open up to them myself again. I just figure I can go off and work it out myself, which I usually choose to do rather than open up anyway.

A good portion of the time, I have a list of topics on which I don't mind opening up about quite so much. When I detect the other person in the relationship feels they need closeness with me and the way to get it is for me to open up to them, I'll choose from that list and "open up." This is also how I subtly test what kind of friend they'll be. If I hear my story on the town gossip chain the next day, I have my answer. All this may sound cruel or cold, but I realize this is what I do and why I do it. It has helped me judge the character of people and not get taken advantage of like I ordinarily might.

[substitute]

Ha, I saw the title and immediately thought of my best buddy ISTP. My instant answer was: when they're drunk