what SP's look for in a potential mate

GirlAmerica · 11-23-2007, 06:48 PM

Define the following characteristics-

Physical:

Emotional:

Mental:

Randomnity · 11-23-2007, 08:30 PM

physical: essential. I need to find someone sexually attractive, have that chemistry, or it obviously won't go anywhere beyond friends. Note that this is not the same as them being model-quality or something silly like that. There is only a small degree of objective attractiveness I need, the rest is mainly a chemistry thing. Personality makes someone physically more attractive to me as well.

emotional:
-willing to talk and listen
-willing/able to be supportive/listen to a bitch-fest when needed.
-not malicious to anyone without a good reason.
-reasonably stable and not ruled by emotion.
-not controlling.

mental:
-not too much dumber or smarter than me, so we're on the same wavelength.
-someone I can have interesting debates with.
-willing to consider/debate opposing views instead of immediately dismissing them.

I don't have a checklist or anything, but I am attracted to very few people on more than a superficial level, so you could say that I'm overly choosy. It isn't on a conscious level though. Mostly the combination of chemistry + interesting to talk to + interested in me is what eliminates most people.

sundowning · 11-24-2007, 03:51 AM

Same things as any other type.

haplo_09 · 11-24-2007, 06:38 AM

As long as she decently looking and not ISFJ/ISTJ - I am happy

sassafrassquatch · 11-24-2007, 06:58 AM

Physical: 100% natural, no artificial colors, flavors, fillers or strange bits of metal poking through her skin. Must be healthy and whole. No amputees or burn victims please. Appendices, wisdom teeth, tonsils and gallbladders are hawt but I can do without if I must. No chronic diseases like asthma, diabetes, etc. Anything like that would make me paranoid that she’s going to die and I don’t need the worry. No blondes either. Blech.

Preferably a redhead or raven haired girl of the sort who burst into flames in direct sunlight. Well endowed bosomwise but not so much as to be uncomfortable for her. Height between 5’ 4” and 5’ 8”. Not too thin, not too fat.

Emotional: Stable, well balanced, no psychos, not too possessive, not controlling, emotions should always take a backseat to rational thought, empathetic/sympathetic/whatever, not too moody.

Mental: Similar intelligence to my own, rational, curious, good for deep discussions, not stodgy, not an intellectual snob, preferably an ISTx.

I don’t want a normal dating/marriage type of relationship. The form of my ideal relationship would be more like best friends with benefits who are room mates. No marriage, no wedding, no rings, no kids.

pocket lint · 11-24-2007, 10:09 AM

LOL @ sassafrassquatch's answers

! Have you found anyone close to your ideal?

whatever · 11-24-2007, 10:30 PM

physical- I usually go for dark hair and dark eyes, but I'm not picky!

I also like people who are as active as I am

emotional- someone who has enough self confidence that they won't need my constant praise and re-affirmations of my devotion to them, self-sufficiency

mental- please not someone who wants to discuss horrible abstract things like philosophy and poetry? a smart person is good though!

all of these would be nice- in about 20 years!

ChazzMichaels · 11-24-2007, 10:59 PM

Physical- I would prefer blonde or brunette, my same height approx., blue eyes, not too large. Sexual compatibility, would have to be adventurous.

Mental- Prefer someone of fair intelligence, I love to talk about abstract things.. sometimes, when my N is showing.

Emotional- Positive outlook on life, we can do it! attitude, must be a feeler who can understand my emotions and care about them.

Loves to have fun!

Can stop and smell the flowers for hours ideally.

arborvitae · 11-27-2007, 05:12 PM

Physical: Taller than me, so more than 5' 8''. Not morbidly obese. Good hygiene. I don't like anybody too vain, but its good to take care of your body and at least make an effort to look nice. Bonus points for smelling good.

Mental: Intelligent, obviously. The cuddly-wuddly and physical side of a relationship is going to get old, so being able to keep up an interesting conversation is important. Can be a deep thinker, but must respect my need to be completely irrational. Also very important to be passionate about something - work, a hobby, a subject, etc.

Emotional: Loving, but not clingy. Emotionally stable, since that helps to ground me. Willing to put in effort to bond with me, since I take a little work to get to know. Likes to be silly and have fun.

Yomama99 · 11-30-2007, 05:50 AM

Physical: Skinny or Fat depends...on the face, I tend to have a preference for short hair or really long hair (no in between) ..but it's got to be the luxurious long hair. She definitely has to be cute.

Emotional: Crazier the better. I'm not talking about bipolar psycho or controlling batheads..just wacky is fine.

Mental: Smart, sometimes smarter than me is fine too! She has to like me for my strengths and give me space.

For female types: ENFP, INTP - NO J's I grew up in a family filled with those horrible types of people who value MONEY and MATERIAL goods over beer, video games.

11-23-2007, 06:48 PM	#1 (permalink)
GirlAmerica Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Type: intj Posts: 247	what SP's look for in a potential mate Define the following characteristics- Physical: Emotional: Mental: __________________ I am the mess you choose The closet you cannot close The devil in you I suppose Cause the wounds never heal

11-24-2007, 10:30 PM	#7 (permalink)
whatever shameless hussy Join Date: Oct 2007 Type: entp Location: wherever Posts: 7,620	physical- I usually go for dark hair and dark eyes, but I'm not picky! I also like people who are as active as I am emotional- someone who has enough self confidence that they won't need my constant praise and re-affirmations of my devotion to them, self-sufficiency mental- please not someone who wants to discuss horrible abstract things like philosophy and poetry? a smart person is good though! all of these would be nice- in about 20 years! __________________ We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. ~ Kurt Vonnegut ENTP- 7w8 so/sp SCUEI

11-24-2007, 10:59 PM	#8 (permalink)
ChazzMichaels Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Type: ISFP Location: Middle Tennessee Posts: 12	an ISFPs preferences Physical- I would prefer blonde or brunette, my same height approx., blue eyes, not too large. Sexual compatibility, would have to be adventurous. Mental- Prefer someone of fair intelligence, I love to talk about abstract things.. sometimes, when my N is showing. Emotional- Positive outlook on life, we can do it! attitude, must be a feeler who can understand my emotions and care about them. Loves to have fun! Can stop and smell the flowers for hours ideally. __________________ Chazz: You're living in the past, Sammi. Me and the Woodland Fairies, we're living in the HERE and NOW.

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11-23-2007, 08:30 PM	#2 (permalink)
Randomnity insert random title here Join Date: May 2007 Type: ISTP Posts: 1,454	physical: essential. I need to find someone sexually attractive, have that chemistry, or it obviously won't go anywhere beyond friends. Note that this is not the same as them being model-quality or something silly like that. There is only a small degree of objective attractiveness I need, the rest is mainly a chemistry thing. Personality makes someone physically more attractive to me as well. emotional: -willing to talk and listen -willing/able to be supportive/listen to a bitch-fest when needed. -not malicious to anyone without a good reason. -reasonably stable and not ruled by emotion. -not controlling. mental: -not too much dumber or smarter than me, so we're on the same wavelength. -someone I can have interesting debates with. -willing to consider/debate opposing views instead of immediately dismissing them. I don't have a checklist or anything, but I am attracted to very few people on more than a superficial level, so you could say that I'm overly choosy. It isn't on a conscious level though. Mostly the combination of chemistry + interesting to talk to + interested in me is what eliminates most people.

11-24-2007, 03:51 AM	#3 (permalink)
sundowning Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Type: ISTP Location: Winnipeg Posts: 259	Same things as any other type.

11-24-2007, 06:38 AM	#4 (permalink)
haplo_09 Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Type: ISTP Location: chicago Posts: 2	As long as she decently looking and not ISFJ/ISTJ - I am happy

11-24-2007, 06:58 AM	#5 (permalink)
sassafrassquatch Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Type: Posts: 967	Physical: 100% natural, no artificial colors, flavors, fillers or strange bits of metal poking through her skin. Must be healthy and whole. No amputees or burn victims please. Appendices, wisdom teeth, tonsils and gallbladders are hawt but I can do without if I must. No chronic diseases like asthma, diabetes, etc. Anything like that would make me paranoid that she’s going to die and I don’t need the worry. No blondes either. Blech. Preferably a redhead or raven haired girl of the sort who burst into flames in direct sunlight. Well endowed bosomwise but not so much as to be uncomfortable for her. Height between 5’ 4” and 5’ 8”. Not too thin, not too fat. Emotional: Stable, well balanced, no psychos, not too possessive, not controlling, emotions should always take a backseat to rational thought, empathetic/sympathetic/whatever, not too moody. Mental: Similar intelligence to my own, rational, curious, good for deep discussions, not stodgy, not an intellectual snob, preferably an ISTx. I don’t want a normal dating/marriage type of relationship. The form of my ideal relationship would be more like best friends with benefits who are room mates. No marriage, no wedding, no rings, no kids.

11-24-2007, 10:09 AM	#6 (permalink)
pocket lint Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Type: isxp Posts: 111	LOL @ sassafrassquatch's answers ! Have you found anyone close to your ideal?

11-27-2007, 05:12 PM	#9 (permalink)
arborvitae Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Type: ISFP Location: Austin, TX Posts: 40	Physical: Taller than me, so more than 5' 8''. Not morbidly obese. Good hygiene. I don't like anybody too vain, but its good to take care of your body and at least make an effort to look nice. Bonus points for smelling good. Mental: Intelligent, obviously. The cuddly-wuddly and physical side of a relationship is going to get old, so being able to keep up an interesting conversation is important. Can be a deep thinker, but must respect my need to be completely irrational. Also very important to be passionate about something - work, a hobby, a subject, etc. Emotional: Loving, but not clingy. Emotionally stable, since that helps to ground me. Willing to put in effort to bond with me, since I take a little work to get to know. Likes to be silly and have fun.

11-30-2007, 05:50 AM	#10 (permalink)
Yomama99 Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Type: ISTP Posts: 51	Physical: Skinny or Fat depends...on the face, I tend to have a preference for short hair or really long hair (no in between) ..but it's got to be the luxurious long hair. She definitely has to be cute. Emotional: Crazier the better. I'm not talking about bipolar psycho or controlling batheads..just wacky is fine. Mental: Smart, sometimes smarter than me is fine too! She has to like me for my strengths and give me space. For female types: ENFP, INTP - NO J's I grew up in a family filled with those horrible types of people who value MONEY and MATERIAL goods over beer, video games.