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Duality experience.....???

Malaina

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Sep 15, 2014
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(Re-post, to make a new separate thread)
Hi there.. Im not sure if Im experiencing what is called as duality.. but a person who I have known for almost two years through professional realms, he has had some seemingly wierd effects on me. We aren't close friends, but I feel completely aware of when he is around. He is what I would consider an extrovert and I an introvert. He made a speech when I first became aware of him, and I walked away.. with a surreal feeling which I cant describe, apart from talking with people in a very unknown responsive way of confidence. Lately, I somehow locked eyes with him unexpectantly for what seemed a long time.. and felt myself in a trance like state where I was completely relaxed.. with him then standing next to me, I felt one with him.. but was also so scared of this unknown feeling that I soon walked away. I also then another time was walking, when I heard him walking behind.. I seriously felt a pull back towards him!!!! I could be going crazy, but from all the readings that Ive done on the web, this seems to fit the what I have encountered. I feel a force drawn to him, which transforms my being to another state which I cannot describe.. but as relaxing (maybe euphoric?). And its freaking me out, as I like to be in control of myself at all times inside. Comments? Questions?
 

Betty Blue

Let me count the ways
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:wubbie: Sounds like you are in Love!
 

Malaina

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Sep 15, 2014
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Come on guys.. here to find some help or insight on what I thought was a forum for people who were very much interested / knowledgeable in this area???
 

TheCheeseBurgerKing

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Jan 5, 2013
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I'm the one who gets stuff done behind the seasons, the practical one who executes. The other leads the way with a crazily annoying, yet attractively feisty drive. Together we kind of just get stuff done with out having to communicate at all really, we just go and automatically understand as it happens.

It's definitely nice whether it lasts long or not. The thing about duality is theres never any tension.

[MENTION=22802]Malaina[/MENTION]
Yeah, you just have a crush on him. That's completely irrelevant to duality lol
 

Malaina

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Sep 15, 2014
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Jeezus, so pretty much everyone else who describes similar experiences that are put forward as duality are in fact crushes/feelings. Not duality?
 

Pionart

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Sep 17, 2014
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NiFe
Well, you're more likely to have a crush on a dual.
 

Opal

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here to find some help or insight on what I thought was a forum for people who were very much interested / knowledgeable in this area???

Most fit the former description more than the latter.

It would be easier to view through a typological lens if you knew one of your Myers-Briggs or Socionics types.

I haven't read through it, but perhaps this thread will help describe the experience.
 
Joined
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Yes. What is your type?

What you describe is different from love at first sight but seems more or less intense.

I would hate feeling that at work, because I like to be in control inside AND outside:D

But when it happens in a place where you can be yourself, it's so beautiful:heart: that connection and energy is very powerful.

That force you feel is probably a positive force you need to trust with TIME.
You could be going crazy or feel like walking away because this unknown feeling gives you the impression you are LOSING CONTROL:imok:.

Love or attraction, whatever, that feeling needs to be developed.

When it happened to me (5 times exactly), I was becoming very aggressive the 2 first times.
It just came out naturally to protect myself (it was also a way to test "the other").
Of course this behaviour makes the person who could "make you crazy" go away.
:ninja: I was still very young and I felt a very strong attraction towards men who were the age of my father...

The 3 other times I just knew this powerful force.
I wanted to be sure this feeling was mutual (it has nothing to do with a banal sexual attraction).
And it was. The guy and myself may not be free at this precise moment. But who cares ?
It does not matter. You know it exists...:wizfreak:

I still see the 5th man with who that happened. He is very awkward when we meet for some few minutes (in his work place).
I don't feel this introvert trustful/confident with me to go further anyway.
All I hope is that my smile makes the situation comfortable and seductive enough and that this very sexual tension+attraction will not always remain "shy".

Anyway, I'm not free, and this is just part of life.

ENJOY YOURS, that does not happen every day...
 

Malaina

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Sep 15, 2014
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Thanks, was cool to read on your experiences!!!

He is an Estp I reckon, Im not sure if Im an Infp or Infj... So he could be my dual or conflictor.. Intensity is what I feel when he is around, where I can't block him out like I can with other people who kinda seek attention. Which can be quite stressful when you try to work and stay focussed. I also see ways in which he tries to get inside my world at work, which I shut them down because I dont completely understand what he is trying to achieve. Im not completely open to being myself at work - in some ways I am a different person just for my job. But I reckon it could be a duality thing, day seems boring when hes not around
 

Poki

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Dated my dual(ENFP) for over a year and it is the easiest most laid back and comfortable relationship, on both sides, not just mine. Its over now, but has nothing to do with direct personality, more learned personality. We are now working on just friends. Luckily we get along really well so that part wont be hard, its the want for more that will be harder. We will find a happy medium, will just take time. And until then we have a good time together, almost no fights/arguments, and work really good together which means all focus is pretty much on finding that happy medium, not other crap.
 

NK258

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I was involved with an ESTP (though I must confess he might be ENTP), I'll probably never know. But. I was involved 2 years about and of all the people out there , I know if someone were to ask him about me, he would have love in his heart for me and laugh remembering me. But, I was the absolute worst to him than anyone ever before. He just took it and I'll never know why. He sends a random email every blue moon and we'll exchange a few words and that's it. He's the entire reason why I got online to work on understanding my type better. I had been typed a year prior.
 

chubber

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Well, they say at first you will not even recognise your dual because they would seem so boring. That is if we talk in Socionics dual terms.
 

Poki

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Well, they say at first you will not even recognise your dual because they would seem so boring. That is if we talk in Socionics dual terms.

I disagree. I would say that due to personality and life you are not drawn together. Its a hmmm....walk off thing. You notice each other, but you don't really "need" each other so there has to be some external force to create and maintain that initial bonding.
 
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