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  1. #1
    A wannabe dog
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    Default Supervisor relationships

    Hello, I am conducting a research here.
    If you are a supervisee, how do you view your supervisor? If you are a supervisor, how do you view your supervisee?
    And would you ever date your supervisor/supervisee?


    I am INFJ and my supervisor is supposed to be ENTJ. I happened to know an ENTJ irl and I noticed that I have a love-hate relationship with him. I love and admire him so much, yet at the same time, I fear him and I often find myself avoiding him. I find him very scary. I am always walking on eggshells around him. I am always afraid that he will get mad at me. Yet at the same time, I find him intriguing. I feel like I want to get to know him better. Whenever he isn't around me, I start missing him and start hungering for his presence. But whenever he is around me, I start cringing in fear and I feel like running away from him.
    My feelings for him is very complex, it's a combination of admiration, fascination, love, fear, anger. I wonder if this is how supervisor-supervisee relationship is supposed to be like.

  2. #2
    AKA Nunki Polaris's Avatar
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    Thinking about the Supervisor thing makes me question my Socionics type, because the person in my life who was by far most Supervisor-like was definitely not an ENTj. If he was my Supervisor (and surely he was--I can't imagine anyone Supervising me more thoroughly than he did), he was an ISFp.

    Would I ever date someone like that? Hell, no. It's a terrible, terrible situation for you as the Supervisee. For me it was a little like being religious again (note that I didn't date this person). The perfect being was constantly monitoring my every action, and nothing I did was good enough to satisfy him. It got to the point that every conversation with him was stressful--there would constantly be something I was saying that needed to be criticized. And because you like the person, it's hard to do what you should do, which is run away and don't look back.

    My recommendation to anyone considering dating their Supervisor is to give it a pass while they have a chance. My experience is that the relationship doesn't start showing its true nature until you're hooked.

    That's what I'm saying while I have my "socionics hat" on, anyway. In reality, I'm skeptical about the theory's ability to predict these things and think you should date anyone you want to date, which may include a supposed Supervisor whom you get along with marvelously.
    [ Ni > Ti > Fe > Fi > Ne > Te > Si > Se ][ 4w5 sp/sx ][ RLOAI ][ IEI-Ni ]

  3. #3
    Senior Member Alea_iacta_est's Avatar
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    I have not truly engaged an EIE in anything besides a basic conversation or greeting, so I am unable to answer for being a supervisee.

    I have supervised an LSE, and it is important to note that both LSE and ESEs tend to be highly inept at discerning what is important, when to wait and when to go, and seeing ulterior dynamics in the background (1-D Ni, Inept at perceiving distortions in reality), and thus I feel extremely annoyed when they do things for absolutely no ulterior purpose or without anything perception on whether or not that needed to be done or whether or not it was even important. That said, the most annoying quality of LSE specifically revolves around this incapacity to determine what is important in combination with their Dual-Seeking Fi+, which inclines them to seek compliments for doing mostly pointless work and expect praise (from what I have experienced with this sociotype).

    The specific LSE I have supervised for quite some time now is interesting, considering that she is in a relation of duality with my friend (and beneficiary, EII). Thus, I am completely baffled at how my beneficiary could possibly enjoy such a person, yet through the system am forced to realize that even though my Supervisee annoys me endlessly, that the LSE's way of doing things is not wrong, but resoundingly different and strange to my own.

    I'm skeptical about the theory's ability to predict these things and think you should date anyone you want to date, which may include a supposed Supervisor whom you get along with marvelously.
    All inter-type relations does is assess psychological compatibility via respective cognitive styles (Duals can be terrible, Conflictors can be good). That being said, it would probably be highly difficult to maintain a Supervisor-Supervisee romantic relationship, but if the Supervisor is willing to hold back and recognize the other way of doing things, perhaps the relations can unfold in a more beneficial light. However, problems may arise if a sociotype's Super-Id needs are not met or are neglected completely.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    **How to tell which types you Supervise and are Supervised by (as well as Mirror and Conflictor), if you do not know.**

    1. Which temperament annoys you the most? (Ej, Ip, Ep, Ij)

    • Ej: People who are proactively organizing things and managing things all of the time, they are always engaged and committed to something that requires their "leadership" finesse, tend to be over-committed and overly concerned with planning and organizing things.
    • Ip: People who seem to never engage in anything and always go with the flow, overly lazy people who seem too relaxed and passive, unconcerned even, with what happens around them.
    • Ep: People who seem overly impulsive and overly energized, doing everything on a whim's notice without any forethought or respect for any sense of order, those who are impatient and can't keep still, always on the move.
    • Ij: People who seem way too restrained for their own good and too stalwart or stable for any sort of spontaneity to occur, people who are overly methodical and precise in their sphere of influence, no room for anything but what is deemed right or correct, overly cautious.


    Ip's supervise and are supervised by Ej types (Supervisor Rings: ILI -> LSE -> SEI -> EIE -> ILI, and IEI -> ESE -> SLI -> LIE -> IEI)

    Ep's supervise and are supervised by Ij types (Supervisor Rings: ILE -> LSI -> SEE -> EII -> ILE, and IEE -> ESI -> SLE -> LII -> IEE)

  4. #4
    alchemist Legion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Complexity View Post
    Hello, I am conducting a research here.
    If you are a supervisee, how do you view your supervisor? If you are a supervisor, how do you view your supervisee?
    And would you ever date your supervisor/supervisee?


    I am INFJ and my supervisor is supposed to be ENTJ. I happened to know an ENTJ irl and I noticed that I have a love-hate relationship with him. I love and admire him so much, yet at the same time, I fear him and I often find myself avoiding him. I find him very scary. I am always walking on eggshells around him. I am always afraid that he will get mad at me. Yet at the same time, I find him intriguing. I feel like I want to get to know him better. Whenever he isn't around me, I start missing him and start hungering for his presence. But whenever he is around me, I start cringing in fear and I feel like running away from him.
    My feelings for him is very complex, it's a combination of admiration, fascination, love, fear, anger. I wonder if this is how supervisor-supervisee relationship is supposed to be like.
    Omg yesss /me with (an) ESFj

    i onli d8 dualz

  5. #5
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    My supervisor is also ENFJ, but he is 3w2. Him and I share A LOT in common and get along really really well. Though we both have said to each other that we're surprised we have killed each other yet because we can also clash in our similarities. We're both very outspoken, opinionated, driving, and emotionally expressive. When both of us are in a bad mood, we avoid each other as much as possible, cause then bad things would happen.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
    Functions: Fe > Te > Ni > Se > Si > Ti > Fi > Ne
    Enneagram: 1w2 - 3w4 - 6w5 (The Taskmaster) | sp/so
    Socionics: β-E dimer | -
    Big 5: slOaI
    Temperament: Choleric/Melancholic
    Alignment: Lawful Neutral
    External Perception: Nohari and Johari


  6. #6

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    Socionics: I am an LII-Ne subtype, while my supervisor is either an ILI-Te or an LII-Ti.
    MBTI: I am likely INTP, while my supervisor is likely an INTJ or possibly an ISTP or INTP.

    He is most definitely a smart guy and I have respect for his knowledge and background, but I have come to the same conclusion that everyone else seems to have already had...that he is "just mean" and "mean spirited".

    He's sort of obsessed with his own reputation and frustrated by the fact that many of the people he went to school with have major accolades but he seems to be left out. Bitterness, although common in academia, is not a good motivator.

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
    Robot Fusion
    "As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance." John Wheeler
    "[A] scientist looking at nonscientific problems is just as dumb as the next guy." Richard Feynman
    "[P]etabytes of [] data is not the same thing as understanding emergent mechanisms and structures." Jim Crutchfield

  7. #7
    Member atlascatcher's Avatar
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    My supervisor is the ENTj. I love ENTjs as teachers and leaders because I find myself always wanting to be at my best and to not screw up in front of them. I don't know that I would want an ENTj as a close friend or relationship though because it'd be like having a parent around all of the time. My mother is ISTp and that's enough Te as it is.

    My supervisee is the ESFj. I find most of them to be incredibly irritating and want to scream at them half the time (and I have in the past) to stop shooting themselves in the foot. Having Ni as a blindspot I find myself helping them project outwards as to how things will develop over time or explaining interpersonal situations that have a lot of underlying or symbolic communication. My best friend is ESFj and I love the amount of Fe he has but I could give or take the Si. He can be very traditional and is often focused on what he is feeling sense-wise in the present experience. We're psychonaut buddies more or less however you describe such a term and often times he's telling me what he's experiencing in an amount of detail I could never hope to achieve nor care about but I respect him for it. As far as dating an ESFj...I'm not sure. Maybe but I'd have to see once the time came.
    [ 4(69) "The Seeker"; IEI-2Ni (INFp) ]


  8. #8
    A wannabe dog
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    Quote Originally Posted by atlascatcher View Post
    My supervisor is the ENTj. I love ENTjs as teachers and leaders because I find myself always wanting to be at my best and to not screw up in front of them. I don't know that I would want an ENTj as a close friend or relationship though because it'd be like having a parent around all of the time. My mother is ISTp and that's enough Te as it is.

    My supervisee is the ESFj. I find most of them to be incredibly irritating and want to scream at them half the time (and I have in the past) to stop shooting themselves in the foot. Having Ni as a blindspot I find myself helping them project outwards as to how things will develop over time or explaining interpersonal situations that have a lot of underlying or symbolic communication. My best friend is ESFj and I love the amount of Fe he has but I could give or take the Si. He can be very traditional and is often focused on what he is feeling sense-wise in the present experience. We're psychonaut buddies more or less however you describe such a term and often times he's telling me what he's experiencing in an amount of detail I could never hope to achieve nor care about but I respect him for it. As far as dating an ESFj...I'm not sure. Maybe but I'd have to see once the time came.
    Yes I have the same feelings of deep respect toward ENTJs and wanting to perform to my best standards around them.

    And funny but I don't get along with ESFJ either. My mom is an ESFJ and she pissed me off on a daily basis. There are times when I actually find myself wondering if how I feel toward ESFJ is how ENTJs feel toward me.

    The ENTJs that I know in real life seemed to get pissed off by me a lot. For example, I failed my exam the other day and my ENTJ teacher got mad at me and yelled at me. I always seemed to accidentally end up offending him

  9. #9
    Senior Member RedAmazoneFriendZone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Complexity View Post
    And funny but I don't get along with ESFJ either. My mom is an ESFJ and she pissed me off on a daily basis. There are times when I actually find myself wondering if how I feel toward ESFJ is how ENTJs feel toward me.
    My mum is an ESFJ ! So this is the truth for all ESFJ mums ?

    Fe Si Ne Ti


    My ESFJ mum (even if she has Fe as a 1st function) can be much more into jugements than some ENTJ I know very well !!
    If you show an ENTJ great interest by asking questions, if you are being frank and wilful, and expressing that you too enjoy -intellectual-challenges in a way or another, they will probably like you being around. On the contrary, try to avoid showing you can feel intimidated (a weakness to most of them). And there is no reason to be ! They'd eat you alive

    ENTJINFJ
    ALL THAT WE SEE OR SEEM TO BE IS BUT A DREAM WITHIN A DREAM

  10. #10
    A wannabe dog
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    Quote Originally Posted by ExNinjaTropPervertie View Post
    My mum is an ESFJ ! So this is the truth for all ESFJ mums ?

    Fe Si Ne Ti


    My ESFJ mum (even if she has Fe as a 1st function) can be much more into jugements than some ENTJ I know very well !!
    If you show an ENTJ great interest by asking questions, if you are being frank and wilful, and expressing that you too enjoy -intellectual-challenges in a way or another, they will probably like you being around. On the contrary, try to avoid showing you can feel intimidated (a weakness to most of them). And there is no reason to be ! They'd eat you alive

    ENTJINFJ

    looool at the ENTJ angry and INFJ cry emoticons XD

    And yes, I personally find ESFJ much more judgemental than ENTJ too. ENTJs are only judgemental when it comes to competence, whereas ESFJs are judgemental in every aspects.

    It's not uncommon for my ESFJ mum to judge people based on their jobs. For example, there was once when I wanna apply a part time job as an assistant at the clothing store and my ESFj mom got angry over this and kept yelling at me over this, she said I am embarrassing her by working there.
    Then I worked as a dental assistant, and she said why I worked in those dirty places.
    Then I worked as a private tutor, and she said this job isn't able to support me financially.
    She always has some critical comments to make on every jobs that I have. The only job that she doesn't mind me working is 9-to-5 office cubicle jobs, but I get depression (diagnosed by psychiatrist too) from working those type of office cubicle jobs, seems like my ESFJ mum cares more about her pride than my health and well-being. My ESFJ mum also often criticised my personality, the way I smile, the way I talk, the clothes I buy etc. It's like no matter what I do, everything about me is just so wrong in her eyes. And I don't think it's her Fe that makes her this way, I think it's the Fe and Si combination that makes her this way.

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